Weird Comment

As you may have read, there was a comment on my post yesterday. Someone thinks we’re weird. Really? Hey! Me too!! Of course, I don’t think anyone is completely normal.

I’m not Suzie Homemaker. I am perfectly happy with a messy house. I don’t like to cook. I don’t hate it either. It’s just something that needs to be done. Is that weird for a woman to say? Shouldn’t she have meals prepared for her husband when he gets home? Shouldn’t she greet him at the door with his pipe and slippers? That’s very 1950s. Nowadays it’s weird if the husband doesn’t pitch in with cooking and cleaning.

I don’t go to church. CNN reported just the other day that “no religion” got a response of 23.1% in a recent study. It edged out Catholicism by a narrow margin. But still, the heathens! So is it weird to have religion or not to have religion? I suppose if you break it down to just no religion versus any religion, religion would win but I’m not sure that has any bearing on whether it’s weird or not. And, of course, it’s possible that no religion simply means no organized religion. I can not go to church and still believe in Christianity. (Happy Easter!)

The only sport Lion likes is football. Does that make him a weird man? Aren’t men supposed to salivate over anything sports? I’m wrong. He also likes tennis. But tennis? Come on. That’s not a real sport. Is it? Am I weird because I don’t like tennis? Or is Lion weird because he does?

The point of this is that weird is in the eye of the beholder. If you think I’m weird for locking my weenie up, or for even calling it “my weenie”, then why are you reading? If you think it’s weird that Lion likes to have his butt spanked, then don’t read. If I found out you had a blog about how to grow rutabagas I wouldn’t read it. Does that make it weird? Nope. I just don’t care about rutabagas. Or growing them.

My First Post-Surgical Spanking

lion being spanked with wooden spoon

This is Mrs. Lion’s spanking spoon. It’s one of our first spanking tools. We found it at a gourmet kitchen store. its small striking surface makes it ideal for focused, painful concentration of swats. The spoon is on the spot she hit the other night.
(Click image to view larger.)

A few nights ago, I got my first spanking in well over a month. I had mentioned that I thought it was time to begin spanking me again, even if it was just for maintenance. On our first outing to a restaurant, wouldn’t you know it, I dropped a bit of my salad on my shirt and the salad dressing left a stain. Mrs. Lion said,

“You have something on your shirt.”

I looked down and there was a small grease stain from the salad dressing. Mrs. Lion didn’t say anything else. She didn’t give me that knowing smile I often get when she plans to punish me for breaking a rule. There was no reaction at all other than that simple statement. I wondered if she was going to punish me.

Normally, there would be no question in my mind. When it comes to spilling food or eating first, Mrs. Lion is completely consistent. However, the rules have been suspended for a while and I wondered if she was going to let this infraction slip by.

Later, after we were home, I was naked and we were in bed watching TV, Mrs. Lion left the room and came back in with her wooden spoon. She didn’t say anything. I didn’t think she was going to use the spoon to serve any food so I knew it was going to be applied to my bottom.

As spanking implements go, the wooden spoon isn’t the most ferocious tool she has. It’s capable of making me yelp and putting red marks anywhere she chooses. Again, the lack of comment or immediate action was a little confusing.

A little while later she picked up the spoon and walked over to my side of the bed. She stood over me and told me,

“I want to see the back of your front.”

This is her way of telling me to roll over and present my bare bottom for her attention. After I rolled over she began swatting me. She hit me 10 times with medium intensity on one cheek and then 10 on the other. Don’t get me wrong, medium intensity is more than enough to make me yelp in pain.

I was yelping loudly at each flurry of swats. She followed a pattern: 10 on my left cheek then 10 on my right, followed by a pause of about 10 seconds. I don’t know how many times she repeated this, but I’m very sure I received well over 100 swats. When she finally told me she was done, I rolled over with two stinging spots where she had applied her wooden spoon.

She limited the area she hit to just two small areas: one on each cheek. This was a very effective technique. She commented that I had two “nice” red spots. As I write this post, I realize I made a mistake. I failed to thank her for the spanking. This means I will get another visit from one of her spanking implements. It’s a serious offense to fail to thank her for spanking me.

She didn’t realize it at the time. In fact, she hasn’t mentioned it until her post yesterday. It’s my job to remind her. I wonder if this second spanking will be more severe than the first. I got the feeling that she wanted to get me back into condition to receive more intense beatings. I think she is going to work her way back up to the bruising, 300-plus-swats I was getting before the surgery. I hope she does.

I’ve come to realize that getting back to normal, our version of it, is really important for my recovery. I know that I still will need help with things I used to do on my own  before. In a way, needing that help makes it even more important to restore the things we can.

I did mention to Mrs. Lion that I thought we needed some new rules that she could consistently enforce. I need to feel her control in this way. Of course, she could just spank me for no reason. Her experiment was a way of doing this. I’m certainly fine with that. But there’s something deeper and more meaningful when she catches me breaking a rule and then punishes me for it.

In the past, I thought that all this was a sort of maternal role I wanted her to play. Now I know it isn’t. Through my recovery she had to do a lot of maternal things for me. These activities ranged from wiping my bottom to feeding me. I didn’t enjoy them. I didn’t think of her as my mommy.

Her role as disciplining wife is definitely not maternal to me, or for that matter to her. It’s something else. I don’t think we have a word for it. However you want to label it, I clearly need her to continue in that role. A big part of it for me is rule enforcement and punishment.

This two month hiatus brought on by my surgery may have offered us an interesting reset. It certainly made me more aware of just how important our disciplinary relationship is for my mental balance. My most recent spanking may have opened up a new technique for Mrs. Lion. I don’t recall her ever focusing on just two small areas. I’m not even sure this is something she would want to do regularly. But, it turns out that it’s very effective from my end; or should I say to my end.

After all, the purpose of spanking is to cause maximum pain without serious injury. Focused swats hurt a lot. They begin hurting immediately. I’m not suggesting that each spanking only focus on two small areas. I am suggesting that maybe working on small areas and getting them very sore before moving on to other small areas may be a technique that could make spanking much more memorable.

Of course it doesn’t really matter what I think. My job is to present my bottom, remain in place until Mrs. Lion is done, and then thank her for her efforts.

As I’ve mentioned before, regular discipline seems to connect to my libido. Somehow, being required to follow rules and getting spanked for disobeying them makes me generally hornier. Go figure!

That doesn’t mean I eagerly await my next beating. I don’t. When I know I’m going to be punished, I dread its delivery. I know I’m going to end up with a very sore bottom and some other painful and humiliating punishment dessert. You’d think that I would anticipate this activity because I know it provides me with sexual fuel. I don’t.

There’s nothing logical about the way I’m wired when it comes to punishment and sex. I think that the turn on comes from feeling the strict, consistent control; not the beating. In a way that’s splitting hairs. The control is demonstrated by hurting and humiliating me. Somehow, somewhere there is a logically consistent explanation for all this. Fortunately, I don’t need to know it for me to get the benefit of Mrs. Lion’s paddle.

Rule Breaker

I failed to mention that the other night, when we went out to dinner, Lion spilled something on his shirt. I suspended the rules during his recovery period but I resumed them a few weeks ago. Lion tried to follow them while he was under no obligation to do so and he did a pretty good job. Obviously, I wasn’t going to whomp him for spilling food when he was barely able to feed himself. And since I reinstated the rules he hasn’t really done anything to warrant a punishment. Until Wednesday night.

I can pretty much always count on Lion to make a mess when he eats. He tries very hard, but his food has a mind of its own. I swear it jumps off the fork onto his shirt all by itself. Any time we have chips and salsa, the salsa spends more time on his shirt than on the chips. This time it was either his soup or salad dressing that got him. Splot! Right on his shirt. Poor Lion.

When we got home, I got the key out of the lock box and grabbed the wooden spoon. After I unlocked him and he got the cock ring off, I told him to roll over. The wooden spoon was the first thing I saw and, although it can be mean when applied forcefully to one spot, I figured it was a good thing to start off with as his first spanking after the rules were back. Actually, the wooden spoon was always my go-to when I wanted to give Lion a bruise. Its small head concentrates a lot of power. I’ve since learned I can give him bruises with a variety of paddles.

I started off with ten swats and a rest, ten more swats and another rest, and so on. He got a little wiggly from time to time but I don’t think it was anything he couldn’t handle. He’s taken so much more, although that’s been after a long practice. I told him his butt was almost virgin again. He wound up with two round reddish marks on his buns. I bet he didn’t feel it for long, but we’re now back to punishment.

I just realized he didn’t thank me for swatting him. I guess he needs another spanking as a reminder. He may be sorry he asked for punishment to resume.

Reflections On Our Kinky Lifestyle

This Sunday, April 21, 2019, Mrs. Lion and I will be appearing on the “All the Sex” podcast. You can listen live from 4 to 6 PM EST. It will be available on demand after the broadcast. You can get more information at their website (click here).

We’ll be talking about enforced male chastity and our female led relationship with discipline (FLRD). This is our first broadcast since we were interviewed on the Huffington Post’s sex podcast a few years ago. It should be a lot of fun. Mark and Rebecca have been hosting this podcast for quite some time. Our appearance is a bit of a departure for them. Most of their guests talk about products. In fact, I discovered the podcast when I visited the Mature Metal website which had a link to an appearance by William, who makes their devices.

I contacted Mark and Rebecca because William’s interview was about how he got into the business of making chastity devices. There wasn’t any discussion about how these devices are used. I thought it might be a good idea to talk about more than the hardware.

It’s true that the hardware is fascinating. Like most of the people who make chastity devices and other sex toys, William’s interest was in building a business, not so much pursuing a lifestyle. That’s not to say people who make chastity devices don’t use them. Many do. But their focus outside of the bedroom is on selling hardware, not talking about how it’s used.

This makes a lot of sense. A good business person wants to represent what they make in a way that allows customers to decide on their own how they will use the product. Any attempt to suggest how to use the product might turn off people that had something else in mind.

Any sex toy, yes I’m including chastity hardware in that category, represents the smallest part of the story it’s used to facilitate. A chastity device provides a way to physically isolate the penis. An effective one keeps hands and other things away from the sexual area. This doesn’t imply how the people who own it will use it.

A lot of folks will lock up the penis for a weekend as part of sex play. Others, like us, make it a full-time piece of mail hardware. We wear our chastity devices constantly. They come off only when our keyholders decide they want access.

After years of full-time wear, I don’t feel right without something locked on my penis. That’s why I asked Mrs. Lion to put a locking cock ring on me until she feels I am physically well enough to wear my chastity device. I like feeling the weight of a device locked on me.

It’s true that the cock ring allows me access to the penis. I can get hard without any problem. I’ve published a picture of my erect penis inside the ring (click here to see it).

I’ve noticed that a great deal of the writing people do about enforced chastity and other power exchanges takes place when they first start out. That’s understandable. After all, when we first start something new we are excited and want to share our discovery with the world. The problem is that enthusiasm without experience and knowledge often goes off in bizarre directions. These novice writers love to use the word “should”. Somehow they believe they need to be prescriptive about their newly found hobby.

We have evolved considerably since we started. It may seem odd at first, but something that seems simple like locking a chastity device on a willing penis, is actually emotionally and sexually complex. I think that anything that involves long term changes in something as fundamental as sexual activity will turn out to have significant side effects.

For example, for a long time I felt neglected if Mrs. Lion didn’t pay a lot of attention to my imprisoned penis. It wasn’t that I felt I needed an orgasm. I felt isolated. It seemed that my penis was locked away and no one could give it any sexual attention. Like most guys, I always masturbated. It wasn’t a daily thing, but two or three times a week I got myself off. I had no idea how important that was to me.

When I was locked up, aside from the physical reality that I had no way to play with myself, Mrs. Lion also forbade me to masturbate ever again. I had to agree to this new rule. Over time, she reinforced its importance to her. I came to understand that in her mind it was very close to me cheating with another woman. She expects that any time I ejaculate she will be the cause.

Since my penis was inaccessible to me, I couldn’t masturbate rule or no rule. I was only allowed to be wild under her direct supervision. Even with her watching I was not allowed to sexually touch myself. This rule stays in force to this day. For example, when we play with the Fleshlight, only she can hold it and move it. She considers it masturbation if I move it over my penis.

After years of continuous lockup, I’m in no danger of jerking off. It doesn’t matter that I’m in a device that gives me full access to the penis. I’m trained not to masturbate.

Over time both of us have adapted to the changes we decided to make. Some of the things that turned me on, like not having body hair, aren’t very important to my lioness. Nevertheless, she keeps me hairless religiously. It’s very unlikely I will ever be furry again.

Stuff like this starts out as interesting things we decide to try. Over time, they become incorporated in our relationship and our lives. We get comfort from the very things that we once considered exotic.

Sometimes, we don’t even notice. Since I’ve been wild (nothing locked on my penis) due to the surgery I had in March, some of the physical intimacy we’ve come to love disappeared. It isn’t that we aren’t as attracted to each other when my penis is bare. It’s that the hardware and the rituals around removing it and returning it have become habits and signals to begin intimate activity.

That’s why the locking cock ring works almost as well for us as my Jail Bird chastity device. Even though she never cared either way, Mrs. Lion notices when hair starts growing back. Hairlessness is as much a permanent part of my life as is a locking device around my penis.

That doesn’t mean that I think all guys who practice enforced male chastity need to lose body hair. Though, I do recommend losing pubic hair to avoid painful pulls and tangles with the chastity device.

Our experience has taught us that it isn’t so much what we do as it is that we do it consistently and with love. Obviously, if any of this stuff didn’t appeal to both of us on some level, we would have never kept it up. The fact that we do means that we get real value out of these kinky activities. If you are new to all this, I hope you find things that become meaningful to you too.