One of the first things Mrs. Lion asked when we began our disciplinary relationship was what would be the difference between a punishment spanking and one that we do as part of BDSM play? She had a good question. BDSM spankings are certainly painful like a punishment spanking. Over time we reasoned that the “play” spankings were different because there was a slower “warm up”. This didn’t seem to be enough for me.
I finally believe I understand the real difference. It all became clear after I read a recent post by a man who is in a domestic discipline relationship. Like me, he is spanked when he displeases his wife. He rarely writes about what happens when he gets punished. Recently, he recounted a disciplinary session. His wife used a wide variety of implements on his rear end. She let him know that she was unhappy with him. She used paddles, hairbrushes, and straps.
One of my favorite bloggers, Julie of strictjuliespanks.blogspot.com has written numerous posts about spanking her husband. She makes it very clear that his spankings are scenes, not disciplinary. She uses a wide variety of implements to vary the sensations he gets. At the end of his spankings he is very sore. He wants these spankings.
We have two different people performing two kinds of spankings. Both are administered by wives on their husbands. Both make use of an assortment of implements. They also continue their spankings until husbands are extremely sore. For the record, both men not only consent to this but want it.
Unlike these two, Mrs. Lion prefers to use one implement. In fact, I think she’s pretty indifferent about which one she uses. Her objective is to make me sorry that I did something wrong. Generally, her spankings while painful, don’t go on as long as the two I wrote about above. I decided to do a little research. I started reading about other disciplinary couples that apparently have no BDSM background. Generally, these are husbands who spank their wives. They do this out of tradition: religion or family.
Obviously, consent isn’t required. It comes out of their culture. They tend to use a single implement, usually a paddle. The idea of introducing variety into punishment simply doesn’t occur to them. Their objective is to send a strong message designed to correct behavior. I find the lack of consent troublesome. However, I believe these are true examples of domestic discipline. There are no BDSM accouterments. The objective is to correct behavioral problems with painful spankings.
In our situation this is complicated because I like to be spanked. Mrs. Lion, on the other hand, doesn’t particularly like to spank me. She does it because I want it and because she wants me to be properly corrected. It’s true that she will give me “play” spankings. These spankings feature multiple implements designed to give me different sensations. They are almost always foreplay for sexual activity when she’s done.
Punishments are administered with one, possibly two implements. Mrs. Lion’s intention is to make me feel her displeasure. More correctly, give me a reason not to break rules. I think she may be beginning to learn that if I repeat an offense too soon, the spanking wasn’t strong enough to send the message. In any case, my punishments are generally administered with a single paddle with absolutely no regard to providing any sensation other than pain. They are much closer to the religious/cultural domestic discipline then the BDSM-flavored variety I read about on the web.
I don’t intend this as a criticism of how other people do it. It’s strictly up to the disciplining wife to decide how she wishes to punish her husband. The only reason the single-implement, very-unpleasant spanking style is important to me is because of my long history of getting BDSM play spankings. Over the years we have been practicing domestic discipline, I found that only after the spankings became sufficiently unpleasant did I truly learn from them.
Even if she never intended it, Mrs. Lion clearly signals the difference between play and punishment both with the selection of a single implement and the dedication to making me unhappy to be in position of accepting her swats. Of course, after punishment there is no sex.
I know Memorial Day is a time to remember those who have given their lives serving the country, but it’s also a day off and sort of a celebration. Summer is almost here and people break out the barbecues. We celebrated a slightly different way.
Lion mentioned that we don’t play our games anymore. I actually thought of playing Zapardy! last night but then I just sat there till it was almost over without suggesting it. However, I pulled out the Box O’Fun. I wanted to review the cards to see if any needed to be taken out. I removed spanking but then put it back in. A play spanking would be nice in the midst of all the evil things on the cards. I did remove a card for tying him to the bed since I haven’t found the restraints yet. And I decided I need to add a few to the box. A handjob with coconut oil comes to mind. I’m sure I can find more nice things to counterbalance the tiny clothespins, Velcro and Icy Hot.
Since I had the Box O’Fun out, it just made sense to use it. I was mentally chanting “Velcro, Velcro, Velcro” as Lion selected a card. Damn! He picked plastic clothespins. Oh well. We make do with the hand we’re dealt. I only had eight plastic clothespins at my immediate disposal. Lion said I have more. I know, but if those eight are strategically located then eight should be enough. I made sure they were strategically located. [Lion — Here is a link to a picture with just 3 of those painful clothespins on my balls. I had a frenum piercing when Mrs. Lion took this picture.]
There’s one spot on Lion’s balls that hurts more than others when a clothespin is applied. I found it right away. Of course, I found other spots that are also sensitive, but that one spot makes him wince the most. Naturally, I flicked it and yanked on it while I got my weenie hard. Jerking him off makes it both better and worse. Obviously, he likes it, but it also tends to wiggle the clothespins. Wiggling can hurt. The other thing that can hurt is removing them. Usually I take them off nicely and let him adjust to the pain. Last night I sort of pulled them off. That way the pressure was off but it dragged across his skin as it went. I hope he appreciated an extra shot of pain.
When I was done with the clothespins, I had him get in the blow job position. I knew he was hard but I had no idea how far we’d get. In a matter of minutes, he was at the edge. In another few minutes, he was over the edge and having a nice, creamy orgasm. Afterward, he told me it had been eight days since his last orgasm. Okay. All I cared about at that moment is I got Lion cream filling out of him. I guess we both won.
Mrs. Lion loves games; the kind she plays on her iPad and computer. I am not fond of them at all. I like sexy games where the outcome is spanking, wanking, etc. She doesn’t seem to care for them. Too bad.
She may have a good reason not to enjoy those games. This game is “Heads or Tails”. We have not tried this game. Play is very slow. First we make a move, then take the time to deliver the result. For example, if we play “Spank Or Wank”, first she tosses a coin. Then if it’s heads she wanks me for an amount of time. This can take some time since the timer wouldn’t start until I’m hard. If it is tails, I get spanked. Again, I have to get into position, and then when the timer starts, I get spanked. There is more activity with me than actual gameplay.
Zapardy! is a game that Mrs. Lion used to like. This one moves along and doesn’t take much effort on her part. The way we used to play it, we would watch “Jeopardy” together. I would answer questions I thought I could get right. If I got it right, nothing happened. If I got it wrong, she would zap me with the shock collar. Before we started I would strap the collar on around my cock and balls. Mrs. Lion recently said she wanted to play again, but hasn’t.
I think we may need to modify the rules a bit. In the past there was no penalty for not answering a question. In a way that is fair, but I can escape any zaps simply by remaining silent. Maybe I should get zapped for every two or three questions I don’t answer.
Another “game” we have played in the past was Box O’Fun. Mrs. Lion has a small wooden box in which she’s put cards with things to do to me written on them. The cards are folded in half so I can’t see what they say. The activities range from clothespins on my balls (Link to picture) to bondage and Icy Hot on my balls. As far as I can tell all of the activities are cock and ball torture.
When we played, each night I would pick a card, and Mrs. Lion would do what it said. There are duplicate activities in the Box. After I pick a card, she retires it in another box. The idea is that eventually I will pick every card and suffer every activity. Then she would put the cards back in the box and start again. At any time she can add new activities to the box.
This game assured we would play regularly. It also added an element of suspense for me since I know that some activities are very unpleasant, like dollhouse clothespins on the head of my cock.
We used to play our NFL game. This game is very simple. We watch a game together. Every time either team scores I get 2 spanks for each point. Touchdowns are 12 swats, field goals 6, etc. If our quarterback is sacked, I get 3 and 3 if our team fumbles. Sometimes Mrs. Lion would hit much harder when the team we were not rooting for would score. At the end of the game, I had a sore butt and we had fun.
It seems that unless we do these things regularly, we just stop. It’s too easy to just slip back into inactivity. I’m hoping we can decide to consistently play again. Maybe we can find new games to play. Do you have a favorite?
We ventured out to the store yesterday afternoon. Along the way, we passed the fruit stand where I bought Lion some cherries the other day. When I stopped, there was one other car. Yesterday, there were at least seven cars. That’s far too many people in one spot even if they are all wearing masks. Having said that, there were quite a few people not wearing masks in the grocery store. I guess it stands to reason. It is a fake virus after all. The New York Times devoted a whole front page, and then some, to listing fake deaths from a fake virus. Damn liberal media!
I haven’t been to the store on a weekend in months. Lion hasn’t been to a store in months either. It was more crowded than the weekdays I’ve gone to, but most people are still staying at home as they should. Road traffic was definitely up and one of the hiking areas seemed fairly crowded. That’s based on the parking lot, of course. We didn’t stop to hike. I’m pretty sure there was little social distancing happening. I doubt it was as bad as some of the videos I’ve seen of beaches and swimming areas. “This is ‘Merica. We do what we want. It’s a free country.” Okay. I’m off my soapbox.
We did manage to play last night. Well, it was evening. I gave Lion the beginnings of a blow job. I don’t think he’s ready for an orgasm. Plus, I think he took a step back in the tummy trouble category. We’re both still worried about that. In the meantime, we’ll try to have some fun. Even if he can’t make it far, we get as far as we can. It still feels good. He likes it. I like it. Why not?
The rest of the night we watched old TV shows like the Mary Tyler Moore Show and the Dick Van Dyke Show. It’s fun to see people who went on to appear in other shows and films. Last night we saw Gavin MacLeod on the Dick Van Dyke Show. Of course, he went on to the Mary Tyler Moore Show some years later. I think it amuses Lion that I can pick out younger actors. Law and Order is even doing a run of shows highlighting actors who’ve appeared over the years. We watch so much TV, we joke we’re running out of things to watch.
Today is rainy and cold. We had our outing yesterday. That should last us for a while. We’ll hang out today and I’ll get some chores done. Tomorrow I go back to work, still from home. I’m enjoying that while I can. It’s only a matter of time before they want me back in the office.