One of the paradoxes of forced male chastity is that while the keyholder has the power, the caged male frequently directs the action. Caged males always ask their keyholders to be “in charge” yet invariably talk about things they want to try. If you’re a keyholder you may wonder if you are doing your job if your caged male tells you about things he wants you to try and then you actually try them. So, who’s in charge?
This question has been debated endlessly. This debate is triggered when the people in the relationship forget that the language describing forced male chastity is not the same as the relationship itself. What I mean is that the male chastity relationship seems to imply that the male is controlled by his keyholder. Most people make the mistake of believing that the male has no input. As you have seen here before, any power exchange requires negotiation. Some people take that to absurd limits and have a massive written contract that tries to cover every conceivable possibility. Others, assume that the male should have no input whatsoever.
I like the “irrevocable” wish concept. It’s very simple. The male suggests something he would like his top to do, or a rule he thinks he should follow. The top, his keyholder, decides if she wants to grant this “wish”. If she does, he is then asked, “Are you sure? Once you agree you can’t back out.” If he agrees, then case closed, he’s got to live with it. That’s where “You have no choice” comes in. So, when I decided the shock collar would be a great addition to our chastity activities, and Mrs. Lion agreed, my ability to change that ended. I may live to regret that she can send a shock to my balls anytime she wants, but under this concept, I can’t prevent it.
What happens if I really hate something that either I or lioness proposed? It’s bound to happen eventually. The answer is absolutely simple: I ask her if we can suspend or eliminate that activity. A case in point is weekend diapers. I disliked them from the start, but felt it was a reasonable exercise of her power. I discovered that my sleep was badly disturbed by the diaper. Its extra insulation made me uncomfortably hot. Wearing it out in public wasn’t too bad, but it was hot then too. Mrs. Lion knows how little I like this. When we got the shock collar she had to choose between the diaper and the collar. I can’t wear both. If I pee with the collar on, it will get gross very quickly and could malfunction. So far my lioness prefers the collar. I can see her using the diapers for punishment (I hope she won’t!). She hasn’t agreed to eliminate them.
The point is that there is no such thing as absolute control in any modern chastity situation. The best way for control to be surrendered is through one-way consent. The caged male or his keyholder proposes a new rule or activity. The caged male gets to agree or disagree. Once there is agreement, then the caged male no longer gets a choice. It’s that simple.