Possible Lion Rules

None of these seem like rules requiring punishment. Perhaps my title should be Mrs Lion’s Wish List.

•  So Lion wants to eat semen. Well, wants is a strong word. But he has eaten it in the past. A few months ago I asked him if he was willing to trade having an orgasm for eating his semen. He agreed. So he has done it before. He is correct. I am fairly selfish with it. But if he wants to do it more often, I think I can accommodate him. However, blow jobs are mine. Anything else is negotiable.

• Lion doesn’t want to make decisions about where/what we eat for dinner. I’ve been trying to do it more often. I reserve the right to ask him to make certain meals at certain times. He is, of course, welcome to make suggestions. I will then act on them or not as I see fit. However, if I am in charge then my decision should be final. We have a standing agreement (I thought) that whenever one of us is having stomach issues we eat a certain meal that is least likely to make us feel worse. Somehow, this procedure works when he isn’t feeling well, but not so much when I’m not feeling well. I am less likely to argue with him when my stomach is attacking so I wind up eating something that either doesn’t help or actually aggravates the situation. No more. I need to be more forceful with my decisions.

• Lion is in charge of the finances. There are a few reasons for that. When I first moved in I didn’t have a job. It seemed ridiculous for me to be in charge of his money. But the major reason is that I am horrible with finances. If he wants to keep a roof over our heads he should be in charge of the money. Over the years we’ve tended to keep our money separated. I give him a portion of my paycheck and he makes most of the purchases for the household. I pay a few bills with my remaining money. In little doses, I can manage money because I know a tiny amount has to last me a long time. However, there are problems with this arrangement. It drives Lion crazy that I will not tell him when I have no money left. I also never ask for things. The flip side of this is that Lion will buy things because he wants them. Why is that a problem? Throughout the year I try to come up with ideas for his birthday, our anniversary, etc. and I am usually out of ideas because he’s bought everything he wants. Maybe we need a pool for discretionary spending. Maybe if I knew there was a slush fund I might be more likely to ask for things. Maybe not. But it might keep him from buying his future birthday present before I can.

• There were times when I kept Lion chained to the bed. He had enough lead to get to the bathroom, but not anywhere else in the house. Obviously I can only do that when I’m nearby, but he likes being restrained and it takes little to no work on my part. I’ve been toying with the idea of doing that again. Once we are settled in for the night watching tv he usually doesn’t venture further than the bathroom anyway, but knowing he can’t even if he wants to gives me the power.

Numbers one and four will almost definitely go into effect. Number two is really just a modification of an existing rule. Number three requires negotiations.