(Wednesday, July 23, 2014) Since I haven’t been writing down orgasm dates, by my rough calculation I think this is my sixth day without coming. Last night, Mrs. Lion inserted the large (not super large) Njoyand left it in a couple of hours. I was locked up the entire time. Afterward, I asked if Mrs. Lion was going to unlock me. She said, “No.” I told her that I was finally horny. She took note of my sexual weather report, but I remained caged. So here I am at around a week feeling grumbly. I’m also really tired. I haven’t been sleeping well. Grumpy and tired aren’t a good combination.
I’m also happy that Mrs. Lion is in control. I asked for an orgasm and was refused. I didn’t even growl. At this point in our chastity life, a growl is likely to further delay release. I’m surprised at how predictable I’ve become. There was one change this time. Usually by day 5 I am tree-humping horny. This time I wasn’t. In fact, even though I feel grumpy, I am not crazy to come. I know that with very little effort Mrs. Lion can make me tree-humping crazy to come, but it isn’t spontaneous now. I don’t think this is a major change, probably just due to life pressures and being tired. Does it mean I can wait more? Probably. But then, I can always wait more. I know I don’t control that.
It’s pretty easy to limit my feelings to sex. It seems to be the prevailing topic when caged males write. But at least for me, more is going on. I’ve been wondering about whether I am, in fact, still in control. After last night, I am finally learning that I’m not. I had thought about how discovering that I really lost control will feel. Professionally and personally I am a control freak. By that I don’t mean dictator, just that something in me wants to know exactly where things stand at any given moment. This need was behind my request to know how long my wait will be between orgasms.
Most surprising to me, I am not really concerned that I don’t know when Mrs. Lion will let me orgasm. It’s true that I can’t count the days like a kid waiting for Christmas, but I am not upset by this. To me this is a very good sign. It is one indicator that I have surrendered control to Mrs. Lion and I am content (in my grumbly way) to wait for her to decide to give me release. After all, this is exactly what I hoped would happen. I am particularly impressed with the firm-but-friendly way she wields her power. “Not tonight, dear,” is an iron fist in a velvet glove.
This afternoon, Wednesday, her post mentioned that she wanted to wait until I was really horny before considering giving me an orgasm. That got me thinking. We have both struggled with how to decide the time between my orgasms. One precondition to even considering giving me one is that I am sufficiently desperate. After all, chastity is no challenge if the caged male gets off pretty much every time he is horny. Isn’t part of the game forcing the male to wait until he thinks he will explode? Well maybe not that long. But now that I am seven days chaste, I really want to come. This is probably a sweet spot for Mrs. Lion. Actually, last night was the start of that sweet spot.
Now I’m not saying she should always have me humping trees, but it does make sense that one variable is my level of desperation. That might be the threshold. How long past that she makes me wait can depend on any number of things she wants to consider. For one thing, if I really, really want to come, isn’t she at her most powerful if she makes me wait a bit more? I am not trying to dig my own grave here. I just realized that there can be objective reasons to extend my wait.
I also like the way she approached plugging me last night. She just got the lube and plug and asked me to roll over; no discussion, just, “Roll over, Lion.” Quiet assertiveness. I am impressed! I know that Mrs. Lion doesn’t like being a manager, but the truth is that she is great at it. Most importantly, I can stamp my paw all I want and grumble but I am sure it will not convince Mrs. Lion to give me what I want. She is exercising control. Hooray Mrs. Lion!