Chastity The “Right” Way

lion on back

I finally got to orgasm Wednesday night. It was a seven day wait with lots of stimulation.

(Friday, July 25 2014) Yesterday, Mrs. Lion wrote a very interesting post about feeling she is doing something “wrong” when she gives me an orgasm. She said that she feels she is letting me down by not making me wait longer. I never asked for longer wait times. I can say with total confidence I didn’t feel bad Wednesday night. I loved every bit of it.

It’s true that Mrs. Lion and I both wondered how to handle how long I must wait. If you’ve been reading along, you know we have been thinking about how to decide on my wait time. After thought and reading, it occurred to me that my wait time should be until I am super horny. Mrs. Lion independently came to this conclusion. If that wait is a week or a day is unimportant. The key is my need to orgasm. There is no point locking me up if I get to orgasm each time I am horny. Similarly, there is no point to make me wait too long beyond urgently needing to come. When I hit the urgent, tree-humping level of horniness, it is absolutely clear to me that I am not in control of my sexual release. Isn’t this the point of being locked up? So, if Mrs. Lion decides to get me off when she judges I have reached that point, she has made me wait long enough. If she chooses to make me wait longer, that is her choice. It isn’t required.

What about making me orgasm before I get to that point? Is that “wrong”? I don’t think it is. She is in control and as she has said, it is up to her when I orgasm whether I want to or not. I can’t argue with that. She worried in her post that if she gets me off too soon she isn’t doing what I want. Well, isn’t that the point? It isn’t about what I want. She worries she is letting me down on my expectations for being locked up. She isn’t. She really gets it.

Another very interesting point she made is about “happy endings,” orgasms after sexually arousing play. There is no question that I love an orgasm after spanking or anal play. Earlier this week, Mrs. Lion had a butt plug in me for a couple of hours while I was locked it. She removed it without any sexual release for me. It was a bit disappointing, but I couldn’t claim it was unfair or wrong. It is a change for us, but I think it is a good one. The anal play turned up the volume on my need for sex. It was an effective tease. So, as far as I’m concerned I don’t have to get a happy ending every time we play. I’d love one but I recognize that it isn’t possible now that I am caged.

It seems to me that Mrs. Lion and I have to continue discussing and learning. In a way, the fact that we love each other so much can get in the way. For example, I want Mrs. Lion to have as much sexual fun as I do. But she has explained that she currently doesn’t want that much sex. I have to accept that and feel good that I am doing what she wants. Similarly, I think she needs to understand that I want her to control when or if I can orgasm and not worry about my expectations. It’s fair for her to wonder if I am disappointed she doesn’t make me wait longer. I’m not. I’m grateful when I finally get to come. I’m not concerned with how long others wait. This is a game that is between the two of us. We share with you, our reader, but Mrs. Lion and I live it. It’s natural to compare our experiences with others, but because we wait less or more than some is no indication of how we are doing. If we are happy, then we are successful.

Caged male half of a happy couple practicing enforced male chastity and domestic discipline. Locked since 1/2014. Domestic discipline 3/2015. Lion's first mouth soaping was 7/17.

Posted in Lion's Journal, Living with chastity
One comment on “Chastity The “Right” Way
  1. toffeemad says:

    I have just started reading your blog and really relate to what you write. Me and my wife are playing the chastity game but my other half has not got into the tease and denial which is frustrating in Not a way. Anyway keep it real and good luck with the frustration day 6 for me.