Poor Lion thinks he’s at fault for my feeling lost when it comes to playing. I don’t think it’s his fault at all. I don’t think it has anything to do with my just doing it because he wants me to do it. I don’t think it has anything to do with my not getting anything out of it. Up until yesterday I had no idea what the problem was. But the more I thought about it, the more I think it has something to do with work.
Back in April we merged with another office and things went downhill. At the end of June it got worse. Almost every day I feel like I am banging my head against the wall. Most of us are unhappy and looking for different jobs. On top of the stress of working with coworkers who don’t seem to care anymore, I now have the stress of looking for a new job. I hate looking for a new job. Unfortunately, I’m sure I’ve been taking this stress home with me. It has nothing to do with Lion and everything to do with stupid work conditions.
Starting today, on the way home, I am dropping off my stress at the end of my exit ramp off the highway. He can camp out for the night in the woods. I’m sure he’ll be waiting for me there in the morning. Or maybe he’ll hitchhike with someone else. Sorry, unsuspecting commuter behind me. I’m going to do my best not to let him in our house anymore.
I will still adhere to Lion’s anal training and his six day wait. I want to do whatever I can to keep my focus. However, I’ll probably amend it to a five day wait given the fact that our anniversary is Friday. I can’t have an arbitrary wait time affect our celebrations. And maybe with the stress kicked out of the house, my libido will feel more welcome. Last night, Lion gave me some very large orgasms. Maybe I’m coming out of my doldrums already. I hope so. There’s nothing I want more than to make Lion happy.