Whose Choice Is it?

(Wednesday, September 3, 2014) Last night, after my shower, Mrs. Lion got the very mean bloodwood paddle. This is the one from Hanson Paddles to which I (stupidly) applied some rough, anti-skid surface tape (another Home Depot find). She told me to roll over on my stomach and administered four very painful swats. She made a show of tearing up my “naughty lion” coupon. She commented that my butt was rosy red. It felt hot and stung. Then, as promised, after giving me one last chance to pee uncaged, Mrs. Lion locked me up again. She asked me if I wanted to be locked up. I gave a very dubious, “Yes.”

“You don’t want to be locked up?”

“Ummm.”

“You did ask for this, didn’t you?”

(Pause) “I did.”

With that she handed me the base ring and I put it on. Once on, she caged me and tightened the security screw, I could feel the cage and its weight. I wonder what she would have said or done if I had objected to going back into my cage. Would she insist, or would she let me stay wild? The bigger question remains: Is my chastity under my control? Can I say, “Stop,” and Mrs. Lion will unlock me?

Before being released for the long weekend, I had no doubt that Mrs. Lion was in firm control. Nothing happened while I was wild to suggest anything has changed. Maybe it was the question from Mrs. Lion. Asking me if I want to be locked up suggests to me that I can say “No.” and remain wild. It may all be semantics. I think if the conversation went like this, I would feel more controlled:

“You don’t want to be locked up?”

“Ummmm.”

“It really doesn’t matter what you want. The cage goes on now.”

This could be said as sweetly as she wished, but it would have sent a strong message to me. Apparently, it is a message I need to hear. I suppose going wild stirred some insecurity that all this is up to me and Mrs. Lion is really operating under my direction.

Another part of me worried that if I did remain wild, our sex life would return to its former, dormant state. Essentially, I am like a zoo lion who is released from his cage. After wandering outside for a while, he goes back to his cage where he feels safe. Like the zoo lion, I have internalized my living in my cage and when released, I have a good time for a while, but look forward to the safety of being locked up.

Mrs. Lion wrote yesterday that she will be more active in anal training and teasing, perhaps increasing the frequency to every day. Now that is exciting. She also wrote that my next wait(s) will be challenging. I suppose it had to get to the point where she will stretch my time between  orgasms. I guess this is inevitable. I can’t say I am looking forward to increasing level of frustration, but it does go with the territory.

Increased teasing will make the wait more difficult. Anal training doesn’t seem to affect how horny I am in the days after she gives me a workout. I’m learning that there are differences in the long term effects of items in Mrs. Lion’s bag of tricks. Teasing, edging, and spanking all keep me tree-humping horny for days after she does them. Ruined orgasms tend to kill horniness for a day or so and then return me to the level it was at before Mrs. Lion ruined it. Anal training tends to sustain the level for a day or so after she does it.

All forms of attention are very welcome and make me feel Mrs. Lion’s control and love. I guess it makes sense that different activities have different impact on me. Now that we have experience with all of them, Mrs. Lion has the tools to orchestrate my desperation for release. She has a growing toolkit for lion sexual control.