Month: October 2014

Last night, Mrs. Lion resumed her teasing schedule. I was much more horny than I had thought. She deftly edged me several times. When she stopped, I was crazy to come. Normally, I am sorry that I didn’t get an orgasm, but last night I was hurting to come. I stayed hard quite a while after she stopped. In fact, I was still hard when I went to the kitchen with her for a snack. The weight of my erection felt odd as I walked. I almost forgot how that felt. I have to wait until Sunday for release. Time will pass very slowly, I think.

I’ve written a lot about turning an enforced chastity fantasy into reality. Most of my comments have been about the demands a typical fantasy would make on the keyholder. That’s not what this is about. This is about a much more subtle issue: her pleasure.

Pretty much every chastity fantasy includes the keyholder getting frequent orgasms while the caged male has none. The ideal fantasy  has the keyholder become more and more sex crazed as she gets turned on by the caged male’s suffering. That’s a hot fantasy! A few lucky guys actually experience this. Most of us, I think, don’t.

In our case it is very different. Mrs. Lion is currently not very interested in sex for herself. So, the sex is one way for now. She says she really likes giving me orgasms and teasing me, but it doesn’t turn her on. She is my keyholder because she knows this is something I want.

When we first started, I made comments about wanting to give her orgasms while I am locked up. It was, after all, in the fantasy. I quickly learned that this wasn’t working for her. The whole point of my enforced chastity is sexual surrender. That means that not giving Mrs. Lion orgasms is just as valid in our case as endless keyholder stimulation is for others. it’s up to the keyholder, right?

Some people have said (and written) that it isn’t “real” unless the keyholder is doing things for her pleasure. That’s just not true. It’s real for me when my keyholder forces me to wait even when I seriously ask her to let me come. It’s real for me when I remain in my cage at times that I truly want out for a while. Each time she says, “No!” I know it is real. One reason I am reluctant to use the “love coupons” Mrs. Lion has given me is because I am, at least temporarily, taking control. I have to work out being ok with that. After all, they are valuable gifts I am expected to use.

All the years I was a top I didn’t always get turned on by doing things to my bottom. Most of the time I didn’t. I was doing it for other reasons. However, it was completely real. She didn’t have the power to stop me or get me to give her an orgasm unless I wanted to. I enjoyed a lot of the begging I got. Now that turned me on.

My point is that it doesn’t matter why my lioness is my keyholder. It only matters how she handles the role. If she exercises strong sexual control she is doing her job. Why she exercises it is none of my business. She is the boss. Only if she weakens do I feel that her control is slipping. She can make me come or not come at her whim. My job is to obey cheerfully and suffer the discipline she chooses for me. Each time she notices that I break a rule and then takes appropriate action I feel exactly what I had hoped I would feel.

In short, whether or not my keyholder wants sex has nothing to do with my enforced chastity. Whether or not I want sex is irrelevant too. That’s the point. Every time Mrs. Lion spanks me or otherwise disciplines me for an infraction, my feeling of being controlled grows. Each time she makes it clear who controls if and when I can orgasm, I feel it. Why she is doing this has no effect on my submission or her authority.

My pet is back to his horny self again. We played a bit last night. I massaged his balls as they did their disappearing act. The poor things are always front and center. They deserve the chance to hide when he is unlocked. Except, of course, when I want to give them attention. I edged him a few times, kissed the tip of his cock when I was done, and smiled at him when he said he wished he could come. Just a few days ago he said he didn’t think November 2 was such a long time to wait. How times change when you’re a horny lion!

In his post today, Lion says life should not be allowed to intrude into chastity and our sex lives. I believe it has to be allowed. When he isn’t feeling well, am I supposed to edge him as planned? What if I’m not feeling well? I realize he means outside problems and not just illness. But if the wind just blew the roof off the house I think we should probably deal with that rather than play. The point is, there are outside forces that will and should intrude.

I agree that we have put sex on the back burner in the past. I don’t want to do that anymore. I think it needs to be more of a priority. But I don’t think it can be THE priority. Other things come first. And there’s nothing wrong with that. As long as we carve out time for playing and sex. That’s what we were missing in the past. It became something on the to do list that never got done. No more. We’re both committed to placing it closer to the top of the to do list.

I was wondering last night, and I didn’t ask Lion, if he considered this past weekend’s sling fun to be his birthday spectacular. It was pretty spectacular, but it wasn’t quite what I promised him. As far as I’m concerned I still owe him. I bet he’ll be glad to hear that.

[Lion — I was wondering the same thing about the sling play. I was happy to consider it my birthday present. It was very big fun. But if Mrs. Lion wants to do it again, who am I to argue.]

All of us lead regular lives with jobs, family, kids, etc. Enforced chastity generally takes a back seat to everything else. It makes sense. Mrs. Lion and I have to pay the bills, feed the critters, and deal with our families. That certainly is a priority. We have a lot of that kind of pressure now. Does that mean we need to put chastity on the back burner?

You could ask the same question about sex. In fact, it’s the same thing at least for us. It isn’t so much a matter of schedule. A half hour or an hour before we go to sleep could be devoted to fun. It’s more whether we feel like doing anything. It’s entirely too easy to unlock the cage and put it and chastity away until the going gets smoother. That has crossed my mind. But then, should my chastity require me to be “in the mood” in order for it to go on?

Maybe six months ago I could have told Mrs. Lion that I want to put chastity on hold while we deal with external issues and she would have agreed. But now that we are so far into it, I don’t want to even suggest that. What does locking up my cock have to do with dealing with bills, the car, etc.? Nothing.

I think that one of the things that caused Mrs. Lion and I to lose touch with our sexual/physical relationship was interference of outside stuff. We deprioritized sex to the point that we just stopped having any. We are in danger of repeating this mistake with enforced chastity. I got some bad news on Tuesday. That night was Mrs. Lion’s scheduled tease night. Being sensitive to my feelings, Mrs. Lion didn’t try. We snuggled and that felt perfect. I think it was the right thing to do then. But not now.

I, of course, remain caged. Good news, bad news, rain, or snow my cage stays on. I am very glad for that. Even if I’m not in the mood for sex, I hope Mrs. Lion resumes her schedule. I may deny wanting this, but I think that Mrs. Lion and I need to make sex a priority and learn not to let other matters intrude.

Have you had external events affect your chastity? Comment and let us know.

Yesterday was a stressful day. I don’t think either of us was in the mood for play last night. We just held hands and snuggled. Maybe tonight will be more exciting.

Lion has made the point before that the chastity lifestyle is not always exciting. It only occupies a small percentage of our time together. Like most other couples, we have chores that need to be done, pets that need attention and other drains on our time. Once we finally settle in for the night, frequently, one or both of us is tired. To combat that, I’ve committed to playing with him every other night. Even then some nights just aren’t meant to be.

We didn’t get a chance to discuss whether he wants his wait times mapped out in advance. I already have some dates in mind. It’s just a matter of his deciding if he wants to know. His knowing or not knowing will not change them. I think it might be a psychological game for him to know. It could either work for him or against him. He might be relieved to see a wait time of only six days. A wait time of three weeks may have him reaching for his coupons. I’m not sure if seeing a long wait coming up will be daunting or not.

As a kid I always hated March. There are no days off in March. If Easter falls early then there may be something at the end of the month, but March is just a long month of going to school every day. Every other month had a holiday. Even one day off was good. Not March. Nope. Four solid weeks of schooldays. And you know it’s coming. Every year they gave out the calendar and every year, there’s March, nothing.

From that point of view I’d think seeing a long wait looming off in the distance would have a psychological effect. Impending doom. There it is. It’s sneaking up. But Lion’s brain doesn’t always work the way I think it will. It might not affect him at all. Darn it!

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