Place Your Bets

Enforced male chastity has been justifiably called a game. I’ve gone back and forth about that concept. After all, it’s no different from poker or other gambling games. There is an opportunity to win and losing hurts. The stakes, of course, are different. What makes this game so exciting to me is that I really care about the outcome. I love to have orgasms. For some, the game is way more interesting than the outcome (pun intended). Like casino games, only the player is exposed to risk. The “house” (keyholder) always wins. The player (caged male), knows this.

If you think about enforced chastity as a game, things can get much more interesting. Unsurprisingly, the “house” needs a reason to provide this game. Most keyholders play because it pleases their partners. That’s a worthy motive. Mrs. Lion plays for this reason. Since this is a long-term game, it would be good if the keyholder has some additional incentives to play. Unfortunately, this is out of the hands of the player: me.

Are there ways a high stakes sex game can be more interesting to the dealer? Perhaps. Let’s start with the assumption that the player (me) is a good husband and is not in need of any obvious behavior modification. That removes “making things better” from the potential list of benefits. I think that if this weren’t true, that we wouldn’t be playing. Similarly, there is no benefit beyond the game itself for the male. There may be a benefit for the relationship. In our case, enforced male chastity has forced us to put our physical relationship front and center. That reason is enough to keep us playing.

Is there a way to make this fun for the house (keyholder)? That depends on the personalities involved. I’ve been thinking about what could make things more fun for Mrs. Lion. Since she isn’t naturally dominant, she won’t have fun by exercising her power. She does it because I need it. Is there anything else? That’s had me stumped for more than a year. You see, Mrs. Lion really likes giving me orgasms, so extending my wait takes something away from her as well as me. Since enforced chastity is about controlling my arousal and orgasm, is there anything else in the game that might be fun for her?

Like most caged males, I am probably not the best person to suggest things that she might like. Whatever I suggest is invariably colored by my imagined reactions to the suggestion. I’ve been trying to tune out my side and think of things from her point of view. I haven’t been doing well at all at this. So instead, I thought I would decompose the game a bit to see if that triggers any new ideas in Mrs. Lion.

Enforced chastity is about time. The assumption is that with some encouragement (teasing) a male will become more and more interested in release the longer he is forced to wait. The players (me) get an increasing sense of loss of sexual control and get frantic for release. We can reach the point where we will do nearly anything for a chance to ejaculate. This is potentially something for a keyholder to use for her own amusement. Another property of my enforced chastity is that I am far more responsive to sexual stimulation. I was very quiet before being locked. Now I find myself much more verbal. I don’t know why, but I am. It could be that I want Mrs. Lion to know how much I love her attention. Could playing with my responses to arousal be an area of amusement? Teasing is an important part of our play. Every other day or so, Mrs. Lion unlocks me and I get non-orgasmic play. I get edged several times before being locked again. Is there something there that could be fun?

I understand that enforced chastity has a very large effect on me, but not a very big one on Mrs. Lion. I am locked because Mrs. Lion knows I want it and because we have discovered that enforced chastity has provided significant improvements in our marriage. I would love Mrs. Lion to find ways to enjoy my lockup. But ultimately, that can only come from her. Maybe keyholders should spend some time considering how to make the chastity game more fun for the house.

Male half of a happy couple practicing enforced male chastity and FLR with discipline. Locked since 1/2014. FLR 3/2015. Lion's first mouth soaping was 7/17.

One comment on “Place Your Bets
  1. Rambigent says:

    I think looking at the arrangement as a game is a good way to keep a reasonable perspective on things. While it can sometimes be challenging, if the “game” is usually enjoyable for both parties then it’s working. If it stops being fun for one or both, it is time to consider switching to a new game. 🙂

    My wife has a pretty strong dominant streak, though it’s taken a while for her to become comfortable with it. While at the same time I’ve always had submissive desires that I was ashamed of expressing. Approaching male chastity and a female-led relationship as a game has freed us both up to explore these sides of ourselves while also allowing us to make sure that our arrangement is fun and we aren’t taking things TOO seriously.

What do you think?