Believe it or not I am an introvert. I don’t do well around people I don’t know. I don’t even do well around people I do know. It takes me forever to feel comfortable in most situations. When I started my current job, everyone seemed so nice and happy I decided I needed to give the appearance that I am nice and happy. It…Was…Exhausting. Eventually I fell back on my sarcasm and strange sense of humor to give people the illusion that I am both approachable and standoffish at the same time. In short, I can fake being nice when I need to.
I’ve never faked an orgasm with Lion. I haven’t needed to. I bring it up because he’s discovered that chastity and domestic discipline are less fun for him because it’s not fun for me. My first thought was that I should start faking having fun. Aside from the obvious problem of not wanting to fake anything with him, I know how exhausting that would be. And why should I have to fake it? So what if it isn’t fun for me? I do lots of things for Lion that aren’t fun. (Opera. Ugh. I can’t even fake that one.) Why can’t I be happy doing something for Lion whether it’s fun for me or not? What if I enjoy the closeness? Why can’t I be happy that Lion’s butt is red because that makes him happy whether or not I personally care if his butt is red or not?
Ironically, we usually stop playing because I lose interest. Now Lion seems to be at an impasse. Do I snap him out of it with a firm spanking? I am still in charge, after all. I still have the key and all the paddles at my disposal. Besides, we agreed to keep going until 2016. By my count we still have a long time to go. Maybe Lion just needs to suck it up.