Quivering Mess of Horny Lion

This morning, as I was unloading the dishwasher, I had a flashback to this past weekend. Lion fell on the deck and hurt his back. Not knowing how bad it was, and fearing it would get worse with time, I told him to lay down. He said it wasn’t really bad and then winced. We were unloading the dishwasher and he was trying to bend over. I told him he either needed to sit down or lay down and he finally listened. It turns out that it wasn’t bad after all but it’s better to be safe than sorry. It wasn’t until this morning, unloading the dishwasher, that I realized why he listened to me. Once I repeated myself he was afraid to get punished. And I’m not sure how I feel about that.

I guess if I had a firmer grip on domestic discipline I would be happy that he obeyed a command. As a wife I’m grateful he listened. As someone who loves him more than anything, I was just trying to take care of him and it hadn’t even occurred to me to play the punishment card. So what’s the difference? In my mind, from now on, I’ll be wondering if he’s doing something because he agrees or because he’s trying to avoid punishment. Who cares? Isn’t this what I should be striving for? I guess so. But I think I’m still at a point where I’m fighting being in charge. I hope that will change.

As you’ve probably read, Lion had an orgasm last night. His scheduled date wasn’t until Thursday but I took pity on the poor quivering mess of horny Lion in front of me and decided to end his misery. He thinks eleven days was a long time to wait. When I checked the calendar, his next date is much longer. Good thing I decided to adjust things. From sixteen days down to…. Nope. I can’t say. Mostly because I don’t remember off the top of my head, but also because Lion shouldn’t know.

We will continue with the nightly edging. It was a good experiment. It’s nice to have him spring to attention the second the cage comes off. And knowing he’s grumbling to himself because he’s super horny is amusing. Poor Lion. I also decided I can use this edging as a punishment if I want. Did he do something wrong? Uh oh. No edging tonight, my pet.

Last night was also maintenance swat night. He got six semi-hard swats and he took them very well. He yelled a little into the pillow but he stayed still. I used a wooden spoon because it was the first thing I found. I’ll probably try different paddles, more or less swats, and harder versus softer swats as we go along. I can’t let him get accustomed to the maintenance swats anymore than he should get accustomed to punishment swats.

As you can see, I’m still all over the map with punishment and being in charge. Sometimes it feels like the most natural thing to do. And then it turns around to be something I hate. I’ll reel it in eventually.