The Feminine Mistake

man in dress doing dishes

Here is a male wearing female clothes doing housework. This is viewed as a humiliating, submissive act. Why?

It’s always bothered me when chastity fantasies include housework or dressing in female clothing. It bothers me more when women impose this on their submissive males. The reason this gives me so much trouble is what these actions imply. You see, if housework is considered part of the overhead of living rather than a menial task performed by inferior people, there would be no sexual rush in being forced to do it. Similarly, wearing women’s clothing is seen as demeaning, even humiliating for a man. That’s why some guys want to wear panties and other female apparel. It’s humiliating to dress like a girl. Consider why this is the case. If a woman wears men’s clothes, it’s considered cute or sexy. There is nothing humiliating about a woman wearing men’s underwear or other items. The only reason for this difference is that at some level being a woman is considered inferior to being a man. So, a man in a woman’s clothing is seen as humiliated by wearing the garb of an inferior being.

Some men wear women’s clothing because they like how it feels and looks. I’m not including that choice in this discussion. I am referring to the male, submissive fantasies that feature panties, dresses, bras, etc. I have to admit that it is embarrassing for me to think about being made to wear panties. I realize that the only reason I feel that, is my feeling I would be laughed out or ridiculed if seen in them. That’s completely wrong. If Mrs. Lion wore my underwear and was seen, no one would laugh. I see this as a problem I have. I shouldn’t be hypocritical.

The issue with housework is much more serious, I think. Along the line, pretty much everyone buys into the idea that housework is menial duty, or worse, women’s work. That’s why so many males who ask for enforced chastity or FLM describe fantasies where they are made to do all of the housework. Based on my reading, a shockingly large number of keyholders and disciplinary wives also subscribe to this stereotype. The archetypical fantasy has the man surrender sexual control by wearing a chastity device. His keyholder requires his sexual service (what guy doesn’t fantasize aboutthat!), and he is required to cook, clean, and do the laundry. How many blogs can you find where the keyholder requires this of her male?

I do like an element of humiliation in my role as surrendered, chaste male. That’s why I initially suggested diapers and to a much lesser extent, panties to Mrs. Lion. I never considered housework in that respect. The reason for that is that we have always handled cleaning, laundry, cooking, shopping, etc. as necessary overhead and we share it based on available time and energy. I would have been incredibly upset if Mrs. Lion demanded I do it all. Partly, it’s because I would feel it is unfair, but more importantly it would make something I consider an important part of our partnership and turn it into a menial, servant function I would perform. Besides, lions are horrible at cleaning.

If all this seems puzzling, consider cooking. Cooking used to be considered women’s work. Men didn’t do that. But now that’s not even close to reality. Thanks, I think, to wider use of restaurants, cooking shows on TV, and increased status of professional chefs, guys consider cooking a very worthy pursuit in and out of the home. I’ve loved to cook for decades. I am not in the least feminine. I’m also a very good cook. Mrs. Lion says I cook better than her. See? you weren’t shocked that I like to cook? What if I said I love ironing? You probably would roll your eyes, or maybe even snicker. For the record, we both hate to iron.

I think that buying into the idea that any domestic activity other than childbirth belongs to one sex or the other is a terrible mistake. When a keyholder treats making her male do housework as a submissive act, she is making the feminine mistake. This is one fantasy not to feed. I would suggest a new keyholder consider using her power to equitably divide household chores. She can, of course, demand personal services like drawing baths, pedicures, massages, breakfast in bed. Personal services don’t feed the stereotype. This, of course, is up to the people involved. Mrs. Lion isn’t into primping. She is a bit of a tomboy. So, at least up to this point, doesn’t require these services of me. Just as well; she’d be taking her life into her hands asking me to do delicate things for her.

Male half of a happy couple practicing enforced male chastity and FLR with discipline. Locked since 1/2014. FLR 3/2015. Lion's first mouth soaping was 7/17.

What do you think?