Lion dutifully reminded me yesterday was punishment day and that he had one infraction. He even emailed me in case he forgot to actually tell me. We have become so used to emailing during the day, sometimes he forgets when we are together. We talk about all sorts of things, but punishment and maintenance days are not among them.

Lion had a rough weekend in terms of allergies. Having the dog in close quarters is difficult. It’s bad enough at home, but there’s really nowhere to hide in the trailer. We need to splurge on a bath for her. Washing the dander off and having someone who knows how to get the most fur off of her will do wonders for him. Needless to say, Lion was not sleeping well. By last night he was cranky. When I went to administer his punishment swats I made it to eight before he rolled over and said it was too much. I asked if he thought I was done. He said he didn’t care. He wasn’t good at anything so not being able to take more swats shouldn’t surprise me. Obviously we were talking about more than swats.

Once I realized that he wasn’t just being a toddler I decided punishment wasn’t going to work. I can always resume tonight. It’s maintenance spanking night, but I can turn that into punishment. Again, not the issue. Lack of sleep, allergies, and not hearing a word about his recent interviews had come to a head. When I stopped swatting him he was convinced I was mad at him. And that translated immediately into fear that I wouldn’t want to be with him anymore. It’s easy to spiral out of control when so many things are bothering you.

I am not giving up on my Lion. Job or no job, we will be together. His ability, or inability, to accept punishment swats will not change that. If he needs me to brush the dog and vacuum every day, I will do it. I was going to suggest leaving him wild for another day, but I thought that might give him more reason to think I was giving up on him. My motivation, of course, was to make him comfortable. Before I could suggest it, he asked if I was going to get the cage or if I wanted him to get it. Clearly he wanted to be caged. I can understand why. Despite my idea that he might be more comfortable, having the cage on is a reminder that I own him. Especially when I’m not home. Without it, I can imagine him feeling abandoned.

Now he is safely and securely locked up. The key is hidden. He is at my mercy as to when he will be released and if he will be edged. Tonight he will definitely get swats. The only question is whether they will be maintenance or punishment swats. I’ll decide later on.

We traveled home yesterday. Our weekend was spent only 35 miles from Chelan Washington. Friday was a beautiful, clear day with blue skies everywhere. Toward sunset it looked like clouds were coming in from the north. In fact it was smoke from the Chelan wild fire. By morning, visibility was down to less than a mile. Breathing was a bit difficult. Sunday was much better, yesterday blue skies were peeking through. Now that we are home across the Cascades, the smoke hasn’t followed us. There is a bit of an orange cast to the light, but I can’t smell smoke and breathing is easy.

I regularly get email from guys looking for advice on fitting a chastity device. Most of the time I don’t respond. Here are some further comments on fitting a device. Everything I know is already on our “Getting a Good Fit” page. This is just an attempt to clarify points that appear in the mail I get.

Most of the people I know who practice enforced chastity needed adjustments to their custom cages, me included. I’m convinced that if you are serious about enforced chastity, than you will end up with a custom stainless cage sooner or later. There are a few people who manage to fit perfectly in off-the-shelf devices, but they are few and far between. I understand the reluctance to invest $500 in something you may only end up wearing for a weekend.  Unfortunately, if you buy an off-the-shelf device just to try out enforced chastity, there is a fair chance you will not want to pursue it because the cage is uncomfortable, hard to keep clean, and difficult to put on and take off.

I’ve noticed that even experienced caged males will give up on an adjustment to their custom cages within a few days of receiving them. Let me give you an example. My original Jail Bird measured 1 3/4″ in length (you measure length for MM from the bottom; tip to scrotum). My measurements taken several times, came out at 2″. I subtracted 1/4″ and ordered the 1 3/4″ length. After wearing it for about five months, I noticed that most of the time there was a gap between the head of my penis and the end of the cage.  Mrs. Lion and I decided to shorten the cage. Mature Metal, who makes the Jail Bird says the cage should fit like a glove. Your penis should always be in contact with the sides and top.  I asked Mrs. Lion to measure the gap. It was slightly more than 1/4″. So we ordered a jailbird with a 1 1/4″ cage length.

When it arrived, it looked very small. But Mrs. Lion put me in it. With some pushing I was locked up. For more than a week it felt very confining. I was constantly aware that it was squeezing my penis. Then I forgot all about it. I was no longer aware it was there. My penis was always touching the sides and top of the cage. Peeing became much more predictable. My urethra remained nicely centered. Erections never get a chance to start. When I get that early morning wood, it doesn’t wake me up. I am only aware of it if I happen to be awake already.

I’m convinced that a cage should be at least 1/2″ shorter than the measured length of the flaccid penis. I also think that the diameter should be no more than 1/4″ than the actual diameter when soft. The penis, when not aroused, is incredibly compressible. Mine, at least, is perfectly at home in its little cage.

Lion said he wasn’t very horny yesterday. According to his post the other day, that shouldn’t matter. I have no problem if it takes an extra long time to get him turned on. I just don’t want to annoy him by trying for too long. I don’t even have a problem if I just feel him up for a while. I don’t have to edge him all the time. I realize that is the goal. In order to have him at his horniest, I need to edge him. But, realistically, sometimes that won’t be possible.

Having said that, he has no choice. If I want to edge him I should be able to do so. Within reason, illness or injury notwithstanding, he should be available when I want him. I’m not saying I should be able to flip a switch and get an immediate erection out of him. I’m saying, if I tell him we’re playing, within a half hour he should have an erection. With my assistance, of course. I can’t expect him to spontaneously sprout a woody. I know sometimes he might be able to do that. Maybe when I’ve given him a preview of things to come. Or if I’ve caught him doing something he shouldn’t be doing. He’s said he gets turned on by thinking about my power. Whatever I can do to help…

Another thing he has no choice about is orgasms. The other night I said I wanted to give him one, but I was worried he wanted to wait longer. Why? Yes, I need to worry about what he wants, but it’s about what I want too. He has no choice whether he comes or not. It’s completely up to me. If I want him to wait ten days, and then at the end of those ten days I want him to wait another three, then he’ll wait thirteen days. For no reason. Just because. Or, more likely, if I want to give him an orgasm right this very second, he’ll have an orgasm right this very second.

With that in mind, last night I edged him once by hand and then decided to torture him with my mouth. Slow and fast, suction and no suction. I don’t think I technically edged him, but I sure got him going. And he didn’t have a choice whether he came or not. I took that orgasm. I sucked it right out of him.

Of course, he was happy to oblige. He got his silly smile on his face. Afterwards, he said that was certainly a bonus. It was. A nice bonus for me. He just happened to be along for the ride.

(Sunday morning) Saturday night Mrs. Lion gave me maintenance swats. She forgot to do them on Friday and announced Saturday that she would do them that night instead. Well, she makes the rules. She also teased and edged me a number of times. By the time she was done, I was ready to come. She said, “Good! That’s the way it should be.” Yes I guess so. She also said that she wanted to get me off but didn’t want me to say that I had wanted to wait longer. I did say that once. I put my paw in my mouth that time. I’ll hear about it forever. I only have to wait until next Saturday for my scheduled release. It seems a long way off right now.

We just finished breakfast in our camper out here in the smokey, central Washington. Our satellite TV doesn’t work here, but we have LTE Internet and we’re listening to Pandora now. Last night when we went out to dinner, we splurged and got Sangria. My glass was blocked by a giant strawberry. To make drinking it easier, I ate it. Mrs. Lion gave me that look. I smiled sheepishly. She hadn’t eaten yet and she noticed my transgression. I will be spanked Monday night. This is the first time anything I did was noted in a long time. I hate her punishment spankings. Nonetheless I felt a little thrill when she gave me that look. Later, when she began teasing me, I got hard much faster than I thought I would. It did take a long time to get me to the edge the first time, but after that I was so ready.

Right up until Mrs. Lion caught me eating first, my interest in anything sexual was nonexistent. I was sexually dormant. This latest observation is a good clue about my sexual nature. Based on my history and Saturday, I’m not broken. My starter works, but my battery just isn’t strong enough to turn it over. I need a jump start then I am fine. My sexual history bears this out as well. I’ve never been good at initiation, but with a little encouragement off I go. My first experiences with D/S play are the best example of how I work. My partner, who was very smart, would tie me down and spank me, penetrate me, or otherwise play with me. After a session lasting from an hour to just five minutes, she would release the cuffs, lie on her back and say, “Be my attack lion.” (she really did) I would be on her in a flash and we would have great sex. The play jump started me beautifully. Other partners over the years would stimulate me and get me nice and hard. Then I was good to go.

When Mrs. Lion overtly displays her power to me, even if I hate what she is or will be doing, my sexual motor turns over. I don’t get turned on if I am told to do the dishes, laundry or other things like that, so it isn’t submission that excites me. It’s the direct application of power, a sexual jump start, that gets my motor running. For example, even though feeling Mrs. Lion’s power when she told me I was to be punished for breaking a rule gave me that sexual jolt, before, during, and after the punishment I will not be turned on at all. I dread the pain. This didn’t make a lot of sense to me for a long time. I’m not really a pain freak. I don’t get turned on anticipating pain. But I get very aroused feeling sexual power exerted on me.

I’ve tried to find ways to get my sexual battery to self charge. Time will generally get me charged and ready, but usually not enough to make that first move. I’ve tried porn. Some can be pretty hot, but whatever charge it provided disappears quickly. That’s one reason I am not a porn fan. I like watching S/M porn. It isn’t a turn on but I sometimes get information I can put to use.

Periodic teasing gives me enough of a charge to respond quickly when stimulated. The combination of time and very regular edging makes me very horny and keeps me that way. If I am teased daily, by the fifth day I am bucking as soon as Mrs. Lion starts stimulating me. If she stops teasing for more than a day or two, I stop caring and become dormant. I may be intellectually horny; having thoughts that I should want sex, but physically I am indifferent. I guess that makes me a high-maintenance caged male. Without directly feeling power and/or penile stimulation, I fade. I’m sure glad Mrs. Lion thinks I am worth the trouble.