For the record, I am not broken. We are still high on a mountain, far from Internet and cell phone service. This post is being written on a lazy Sunday morning. It’s cloudy with generous patches of blue showing. Saturday night, Mrs. Lion once again proved that I’m not broken. With a bit of effort she edged me several times. As usual, I couldn’t count how many. I was busy. My focus becomes laser sharp as my body prepares for the orgasm that isn’t going to come. Tomorrow, Labor Day in the U.S., is my scheduled orgasm day. Appropriate.
Based on my touring the various blogs and forums, a great many guys writing about enforced chastity belong to the set-it-and-forget-it school of chastity. As they say it, the idea is that the penis is locked in a device and left there until some future date when it comes out for an orgasm. The theory is that a long wait without any stimulation will create an almost unbearable need for sexual release. According to them, male sexual desire grows constantly during a wait for the next orgasm.
The reason they believe this comes from typical male behavior, including mine in the past. Most guys, when unable to find a partner, will masturbate. In my case, in my twenties and thirties, jerking off would be the last thing I did before going to sleep. When I had a partner, she replaced the masturbation at the end of my day. This is fairly typical. So, logically if I am prevented from getting release, my sexual battery will continue charging indefinitely until I either explode or have a nocturnal emission. It seems reasonable.
When guys, like me, first try enforced chastity, the frustration is terrible and grows each day just as predicted. The first wait is not very long and release is great. Even when the waits grow longer, the theory seems to hold true. Most of the “I am going to explode” posts are written by guys who haven’t been involved in enforced chastity very long. Things change.
After being locked up for a while, the set-it-and-forget-it guys start to discover they don’t really care so much about orgasms. In my case after about six months, the horniness grew for the first few days, peaking on the fifth. Then my interest becomes less and less. If you think about it, this isn’t really surprising. Women famously lose interest in sex when none is available. I always thought that males were different and remained horny as a preservation of the species sort of sexual strategy. I was wrong.
Depending on age, interest in sex declines when none, including masturbation, isn’t available. By fifty, a week or so of no stimulation will result in a significant loss of interest in orgasm. If the waits stretch into months, orgasms (according to at least 30 accounts I have read) begin to feel undesirable. Guys say they don’t want to come because they feel depressed for days after an orgasm. In short, not coming becomes more desirable than ejaculating.
Most men, including those not practicing enforced chastity, will lose interest in sex as they age. People are generally surprised when they learn a seventy-year-old still has regular sex. Enforced chastity without very regular teasing accelerates this loss of interest and men under forty find themselves no longer wanting to ejaculate.
If you are a keyholder, this information is critically important. Without meaning to do it, you can train your male to lose all interest in his own orgasms. You can easily train him to have the same interest in your orgasms than he used to have in his own. This sounds desirable from a D/S perspective, but in fact it is suboptimal. As a top or keyholder, the best use of his sexuality is to keep him extremely interested in release; so interested he will do anything just for the possibility of an orgasm. Contrary to popular belief, this is achieved by regularand sexual teasing. The idea is to keep male hormones flowing full force even though there is no chance for relief.
This is achieved by building anticipation. There are lots of ideas out there on how to do it. Edging at least three times a week is a good way. Also, at least for me, letting me know when I will come next builds anticipation. I count down the days. Mrs. Lion teases and edges me nearly every day. Does that seem like too much trouble? It takes less than 30 minutes a day. You don’t even have to take your clothes off. At a convenient time tell him strip. He does need to be naked. Then tease and edge him several times. Verbally teasing him will add to his anticipation. That’s it. That’s Mrs. Lion’s 30 minute lion teasing regime. It works. My next orgasm is never far from the front of my mind. I need to keep Mrs. Lion happy because the last thing I want to do is wait longer than I have to.