Lately, I’ve read a lot about open relationships. You know, one or both people are able to take other lovers. In the case of enforced chastity and FLM, generally the dominant partner can have lovers, the submissive can’t. In BDSM, it’s common for bottoms who have an exclusive relationship with their top to be allowed to play (S/M scenes) with other tops so long as there is no sex for the bottom. Among the people I have known or read online, this one-sided open relationship seems to be the norm. For the record, I’m monogamous as is Mrs. Lion. When I was a 24/7 master, I would never let my slave play with others or service them sexually. I guess I’m just not that sexually secure. I don’t think that is why. I believe that diluting intimacy, whether orgasmic or not, can add stress; at least for me. I was in a triad (two women and me) for over a year, and even though that was not open, having two lovers was stress for each of us.
I know that there are people who thrive on open relationships. It’s certainly not wrong to have one. I just don’t want one. All this came to mind because for no particular reason I was thinking about cuckoldry. That’s when the partner who can have other lovers, makes the primary partner watch and sometimes do humiliating things in front of both of them. The reason that I’m bringing this practice up here is that like enforced chastity, it is almost always introduced by the submissive, male partner. I think it is a peculiarly male fantasy to be emasculated by having his partner accept the penis of another, superior male. In some respects it’s the ultimate humiliation. In every enforced chastity blog there is a multitude of cuckold fantasies. Is it a logical extension of enforced chastity? Perhaps. Enforced chastity turns the use of the male’s penis over to his keyholder. Every fantasy I have read treats this power exchange as humiliating in some respect. I admit that I do too. It turns me on to know that my lioness is the only one who can allow me to get hard or come.
A much more extreme surrender is to support her having intercourse with others but not with you. No, Mrs. Lion, I hate this idea and it would be a deal/marriage breaker for me. I have never had this fantasy myself. Part of the reason I haven’t is that I know I’m not very submissive at all. The lion in me will only give in so far before the claws and teeth come out. But I understand how others can get turned on by it. A caged male has two scenarios: the first and most common is collaborating with his keyholder to have sex with other males. The second, forced bisexuality is another common fantasy. It is the classic BDSM scenario where the caged male is topped and/or provides sexual services to another male without any reciprocation. Both can be intensely hot fantasies. The reality is much more complex. From what I’ve seen, it takes a lot of energy to balance things when another sexual partner is included in a relationship.
My escalation on enforced chastity is domestic discipline with FLM. I not only have no control over my sexual release, but I also get punished for disobedience. I am painfully spanked for breaking any rule or annoying Mrs. Lion. That has a big humiliation component along with the unpleasant pain of the spanking. Being the perverse big cat that I am, I want and need this. I feel loved when Mrs. Lion is strict with me. I can’t rationalize this part of me at all. It’s just how I am.
Yesterday, I was mentioned in the context of the “Blogger’s Recognition Award” in The Thrill of the Chaste blog. I appreciate the mention. The blog also published the “rules” of this award. It turns out it is a very positive chain letter. The idea is that if you are recognized by a blogger, you post about it and list five blogs you wish to honor. You can see where this goes. In a few generations, thousands of blogs are linked to one another. The reason I am breaking this chain is that we already recognize blogs we like to read. They are listed in the right column directly below Recent Posts. They are listed in the chronological order of the last post on their blogs; most recent first. I think it is very important to provide links front and center. Blogs are generally discovered as the result of a Google search (Google has over 95% of the searches that come here). About 55% of the people visiting every day get here from a search, 8% come from links from other websites including blogs, the rest are regular readers, hopefully like you.