Simple, Right?

I’m famous for wanting to try new things. It’s a very good thing that Mrs. Lion is so patient and understanding. I keep coming up with new ideas to expand our enforced chastity, FLM, or domestic discipline. I’ve noticed that others do this as well. I think that, at least in my case, when the Pandora’s box of sexual possibility opens, it’s entirely too easy to try to make everything that comes out into reality. Most of us have enough of a filter to leave some of the more extreme possibilities in the realm of fantasy, but we can get into some trouble on the boundaries of good-to-do and this-can-cause-serious-problems. Where this boundary lies is varies by each person.

The problem with each new idea is that it adds more stuff for Mrs. Lion to do. My overactive imagination can burn her out very easily. It’s not that I want too much. The reason is more complex than that. In the fantasy everything follows the “happy path”. We each play our roles perfectly and everything is exciting. Makes sense. It’s my screenplay about what turns me on (at least in my mind). But when we bring that fantasy out into the real world, it never seems to work the way it did on the silver screen of my mind.

A good example of this is enforced chastity. My mental movie had me locked up in a device and driven mad by the need to ejaculate. Mrs. Lion cruelly teased me with no relief. In the fantasy I had to earn the chance to come. It wasn’t very complex and was extremely hot to think about. The reality was nothing like that. There are over a thousand posts here about our efforts to include enforced chastity in our lives. It wasn’t as easy as buying a chastity device and locking it on. Over time we figured it out and now we are expert at my enforced chastity. It only took us nearly two years to get to this point.

Then I wanted domestic discipline. The movie in my head showed me breaking rules and getting painfully spanked by Mrs. Lion. Simple, right? Oh no! Mrs. Lion agreed to try it. That was several months ago. We both don’t do very well at it yet. In order for her to be a disciplining wife, Mrs. Lion has to decide what behavior she wants to correct. She has to have some method of tracking infractions. She has to decide how to punish me. All I have to do is present my bare ass for spanking when I break a rule.

It turned out that my fantasy of domestic discipline is a huge homework assignment for Mrs. Lion. She has agreed to continue working on it. She’s amazing! How many women would be willing to take the time and energy for this? Nonetheless, we have a very long way to go. We have yet to work out a routine that includes frequent discipline. Mrs. Lion has made remarkable progress. Like enforced chastity, it’s not so much that she has to do more. We both have to internalize what domestic discipline is to us and then build the necessary  habits to make it a routine part of our lives.

My point is that most fantasies are very difficult to translate into real life. OK, it’s not difficult to do a scene where you both act out the roles in your fantasy and essentially act out your script. That’s not too tough to work out. But it is an entirely different story to try to turn the fantasy into a 24/7 reality; to actually add it as a permanent part of your life.

I’ve learned this over the last couple of years as we struggle with making two fantasies come true. Two is a very big number when you consider all the work it takes to change your life in even a small way. The only reason we have persevered is that it turned out the fantasies revealed some amazing benefits for both of us. Enforced chastity has dramatically increased our communication with one another. We talk more about everything, not just getting me off. We both feel much closer.

Domestic discipline, to me at least, may have an important benefit for us too. Since it involves Mrs. Lion identifying behavior she likes and dislikes in me and then reacting in a concrete way, I hope it will teach her to become more aware of what she wants and then assure she gets them. I think it starts with punishing me for failing to do what she wants. I hope that habit will grow into expressing her wishes and believing they will come true. In our case, if the power balance goes to my side, then I know she will suppress her wants and needs. With her in charge, maybe she will consider what she wants first. Simple, right?

 

2 comments on “Simple, Right?
  1. April Child says:

    What you say about the difficulties in making domestic disciplne is so familiar to us as well. THe benefit is obvious: When Things are irritating ar annoying my wife, there is a way to correct it there and then – and move on. In the past – it happened more ofthen than was good that I got “the silent treatment” for days, which was so detrimental to our relationship. Disciplining is definately a good alternative, something we both agree on.

    But as you say, fincorporating this into Our relationship is still not running smoothly. My wife forgets, are a bit hesitant, irregular and inconsequent. I hope we will find a rythm (so to speak) before two years have passed.

    I love it when my wife is clear , determined and demanding! What a women!

    • Caged Lion says:

      “My wife forgets, are a bit hesitant, irregular and inconsistent”

      I know. I think in our case it is because Mrs. Lion sees domestic discipline as something I want, so in some sense she doesn’t see punishing me as something that will do anything for her. It is in her mind, for me. If that’s the case, when she’s pissed off she will be very unlikely to see punishment as something that will help her. Had she been the one who initiated domestic discipline instead of me, then I think she would be tanning my bottom quite often. The trick is to find a way for her to adopt the practice as something that belongs to her. The other problem is that she doesn’t like confrontation, so she will swallow things that upset her rather than dealing with them then and there.

What do you think?