Shopping with the Lions

As you’ve read, Lion found some ginger on our last shopping trip. He hints at it from time to time when we’re in the produce section. The truth is, you can find all sort of “normal” things that can be used for other than their original purpose. I joke that Lion’s favorite store is Home Depot, but he can find toys just about anywhere.

Lion loves coconut oil. I think we may have used it several years ago. He says it’s a wonderful lube and smiles every time we see it in the store. With the big gluten-free movement, there is now coconut flour, coconut sugar, and coconut oil in Costco. He always makes the comment that he bets most people don’t use it the way he likes to use it.

Hardware stores are definitely a great place to get toys. The rope and chain aisle gets Lion’s attention every time. I think that’s the same aisle I found the infamous Velcro cable ties. You can get pulleys and eyebolts. All sorts of great ideas for the do it yourself kinky person. People have even converted reciprocating saws into fucking machines. The sky’s the limit, it seems.

I think it was about ten years ago, Target introduced a new kind of prescription bottle. They had different colored rings for each member of the family. It just so happens that those rings make nice cock rings. They are sturdy enough to hold their shape, but flexible enough to stretch to fit.

Pets stores have dog collars, food bowls, leashes, and Lion’s “favorite” shock collar converted to a ball shocker. Housewares has clothes pins. Craft department have the nasty little dollhouse clothes pins and sometimes paddles intended for craft use, but what they don’t know won’t hurt them. [Lion – But it will hurt me]

And there is, of course, the evil Icy Hot and Bengay. Evil, evil things that were definitely not invented for cock and ball use. More recently, Icy Hot has come out with Smart Relief which is a TENS (transcutaneous electrical nerve stimulation) unit. It can do some magical things when used in an off-label way.

I bet you had no idea you could get some holiday shopping ideas from our blog. You’re welcome!

What do you think?