There are so many different ways that people practice enforced chastity, it has to be bewildering to someone just thinking about it. On the surface it doesn’t seem very complex: remove a guy’s access to his penis and let someone else controls what happens next. Simple, right? Not so much.
As I have learned, the uncomplicated-sounding power exchange is fraught with questions and issues. There is nothing simple about sex. Yes, the actual process is dog doo simple. We all learn how to produce orgasms for ourselves by puberty. The finer points of interpersonal sex take longer, but most of us manage to do an adequate job without attending classes.
You’d think that not having sex would require no training at all. Keep stimulation away from his penis and you are done. We males are more complex than that. My first revelation back in the 90’s was that even thinking about wearing a chastity device got me hard. How about that? Thinking about not being able to get off turned me on. That has to be the very definition of perverse. I’ve learned that most of the guys who end up in enforced chastity have the same reaction. Show us a device to lock our cocks away and we are rock hard.
This paradox has to be confusing to our partners. Hell, it’s confusing to me! Having my hands and feet tied up also makes me hard. There is a pattern emerging. I think it isn’t the chastity device that gets my juices flowing, it’s the loss of control. When Mrs. Lion started fixing my hands above my head, she noticed a reaction below my waist. Conversely, releasing my cock from its cage, doesn’t turn me on at all.
There it is again, the old can’t vs. won’t story. Deciding I won’t give myself an orgasm isn’t in the least exciting to me. But discovering I can’t give myself and orgasm is very arousing. Remove the barrier that prevents me from doing it myself and I lose interest. Of course, it isn’t black and white, but it is a dark shade of grey in my case.
The dichotomy between the physiological need for orgasm and the arousal from denial make life interesting for me. I am deeply aroused by knowing that no matter how much I want it, my next orgasm is under someone else’s control. That doesn’t stop the other part of me from desperately wanting release. This has to be confusing to Mrs. Lion who is receiving seriously mixed messages from me.
Being my keyholder is a delicate balancing act between frustrating me and turning me on by doing so, and giving me sex often enough to keep hope and hormones alive. This is further complicated by my natural body rhythms that change in some sort of cycle and external circumstances that can temporarily kill my interest in sex.
I have about ten days until my next scheduled orgasm. Sometime between now and then I will desperately want release. At the same time I will undoubtedly want to be physically prevented from that same release. What’s a lioness to do? She’s been trying to figure that out for two years.
The fact is that I don’t know what is right for me. I discover that at the same time as Mrs. Lion. In a way I am very happy with that. Enforced chastity is not a cut-and-dried process. It is organic and varies widely with each couple practicing it.