Today is my scheduled orgasm day; at least it is so far. Over the last few days we have both been writing about changes that are happening now. This is the beginning of our third year in enforced chastity. Pretty much since we started, I asked Mrs. Lion to exercise control and enforce it with punishment (and rewards). On and off over the last decade, Mrs. Lion has spanked me as part of D/S play. I find spanking arousing; I always have. So, it isn’t a big stretch for it to become Mrs. Lion’s go-to punishment.
What I hadn’t considered was the actual living in a domestic discipline marriage. To be fair, up until now the domestic discipline has been sporadic and fairly gentle. Yes, there have been times when Mrs. Lion has made a big impression on my butt. Thursday night was one of them. She wrote about how she spaced the swats. That helped me control my movements, but the pain was just as intense as when she hit more quickly. It was an effective spanking. I got the feeling she stopped sooner than she wanted because of my reactions. [Mrs. Lion -I didn’t.] I’m grateful she did, but I hope she will continue regardless of my reaction. I need to be more in control of myself.
We’ve been joking about Lioness. The change is real if the name is a bit geeky. The kind of things that she said she wants to change are very difficult. It’s one thing to punish me because I want punishment as part of our lives. It’s quite another to punish me because she wants me to understand that I did something she didn’t like and that because I wanted domestic discipline has nothing to do with what is happening to me now. It began to feel that way on Thursday.
I think this wish she would own discipline is a source of pressure for her. She’s an easy going lioness by nature. Stirring the pot has always caused her problems. She’s learned it is better to go along than to make waves. Here I come asking her to make waves; a lot of them. If she’s spent a lifetime learning to overlook things and stuff her feelings, suddenly being asked to do the opposite is upsetting.
The hardest part is to just understand what I am asking. She’s done a very good job with that. She understands exactly what I want. The hard part is doing it. As she has said more than once, the biggest hurdle is to observe and note behavior she wishes to correct. Her nature conspires to prevent her from seeing these infractions. Once seen, the next problem is remembering/recording, and finally punishing.
I recently read a post where the disciplining wife has her husband add a dollar to a jar each time he misbehaves. Periodically, the money is counted and he gets a swat for each dollar. Neither of us carries much cash and I don’t often have one-dollar bills, but the idea is a good one. [Mrs. Lion – We have some heart-shaped glass pieces we used for something else in the past. Maybe we can use those instead of money. ] It solves remembering small things. She need not remember, just count items and swat. Bigger infractions, of course, can be punished as she did Thursday night.
The idea is to find a way to help us both be more aware of my position as disciplined husband. Clearly, there are things that need correction. Consistent correction will result in me learning and remembering what I need to do to be the best lion I can be.