Lion strayed into dangerous waters yesterday. He just can’t seem to stop himself. We were emailing back and forth like we always do when we got to this interchange:
[Lion] You should put something in today’s post about what you just wrote.
[2.0] I’m sure I read that wrong because when I read it the first time it looked like it said I “should” do something, but that can’t be right. Can it?
[Lion:] Ooops. No, I meant you might want to consider.
Then we went on with our work and occasional emails. I was in the middle of deciding whether I should give him swats for it when this happened:
[Lion] I did say “should” earlier. Is that on my list for tonight?
[2.0] Yup. I was trying to decide if I should let it go, but I “should” not.
[Lion] 2.0 would never let it go.
[2.0] Are you trying for more swats?
[Lion] Not me 🙂
Uh huh. It sure sounded like it to me. Part of me wonders if he’s trying to push the boundaries to see what he can get away with, but I actually think he can’t help himself. He’s a suggestophile. He loves making suggestions. And telling me what I should do. 1.0 would just take his suggestions and consider them. 2.0 may take the suggestion but she’s going to let him know that “should” will not be tolerated.
Lion did remark that last night’s swats weren’t very hard. True. They were not the worst swats, but why did he yell before I hit him? I gave him four somewhat hard swats, took a break, and before the fifth swat hit he yelled into the pillow in anticipation. It was funny because it was like watching a movie when the picture doesn’t match the soundtrack. Scream. Swat. Weird. He said he didn’t do that. Don’t argue with 2.0. He did it.
Last night I also decided that Lion’s future scheduled dates, rather than being the actual date he will have an orgasm, will be the earliest date he will have an orgasm. Maybe he’ll wait another day. Maybe two. Who knows? It’s up to 2.0’s whim. His upcoming date is safe though. It’s Valentine’s day. Of course he’ll get one then.
Lion’s weekend will be full of challenges if things go according to plan. There’s the new jar of menthol rub we need to test out. There’s a new bottle of green sparkly nail polish that hasn’t been opened yet. We had a comment about the shock collar the other day. Where has it gone? Why don’t we use it? I think it will come in handy this weekend. 2.0 has a specific time in mind that the shock collar could be very useful. And don’t forget about diapers. Oh yes. Lion will have an interesting weekend.