Lion’s post this morning threw down the gauntlet. I’m not really sure how to respond. I feel no matter what I say I will be “wrong” in someone’s eyes. But here goes.
If I’m being honest with both Lion and myself, the only things I really like is giving Lion orgasms and edging him so that those orgasms are as big as possible. The rest, while most of it does get him more excited and more likely to have a big orgasm, I do because Lion likes it and I want to make him happy. Making him happy makes me happy. As corny as that sounds, it’s true.
Having said that, I do like, in the moment, when he’s struggling to make it through a punishment or the clothespins hurt or whatever the case may be. I think it’s mostly because I know I’m doing a good job doing what he wants even if he doesn’t want it at that particular moment. Obviously, it helps if I have my 2.0 hat on too. I guess she’s the equivalent of Lion going into sub space. She doesn’t care what he wants at any given time. She’s got her own agenda and his words fall on deaf ears.
Believe it or not, I still struggle with not giving Lion an orgasm every time we play. Even though I know teasing and denying him makes him hornier and will very likely result in a larger orgasm, I want to make him come. I don’t ever want that to change. That’s the ultimate goal for both of us.
I’m betting Lion feels bad after reading this. He thinks he’s making me do all these things to him that I don’t want to do. Well knock it off, Lion. Yes, I’m doing things I wouldn’t normally do, but I’m doing them because it makes you happy. It’s my choice. And when it comes to being in charge, you have no choice. You’re stuck with things the way they are. Your fate is sealed. If I ever forget that, 2.0 will show up and remind both of us.