Even after all this time we sometimes struggle with whether or not we practice “true” FLR. I think the reason we do is that there are a lot of expectations floating around out there that don’t feel a bit like what we do. So, maybe it’s time that I take a shot at a definition that seems to work for Mrs. Lion and I.
First off, having been a 24/7 Master in days gone by, I can say with some authority that no realistic full-time power exchange can survive as the micro-management fantasy most people think about when we mention FLR. Being in charge doesn’t mean standing over your partner with a whip in hand. It also doesn’t have to mean that domestic duties automatically transfer to the male.
I know, I know, lots of fantasies revolve around a husband/wife role exchange. In my opinion that’s a BDSM scene, not a lifestyle. Mrs. Lion and I are partners. There is nothing I wouldn’t do for her with or without FLR. We take care of each other. That hasn’t changed since we began enforced chastity and FLR. I don’t expect it ever will. We divide chores. True, Mrs. Lion can assign them to me without consultation, but we still divide them.
I can hear you thinking, “Where’s the female led relationship?” We have one. For example, Mrs. Lion can make and enforce rules. If I break a rule, I get punished; not BDSM-play punished, but a spanking that hurts and carries no sexual arousal.
I have to be obedient, not just cooperative. On the surface they look the same, but they are very different. If I am asked to do something, or, for that matter, to stop doing something, I have to; right then and there. Cooperation requires my agreement. Obedience has no need for my input.
Because she can require me to do as she wishes, doesn’t mean Mrs. Lion goes out of her way to find ways to make me feel her power. That wastes her energy and does nothing for me. If she thinks I am forgetting my place, she only has to give me a “maintenance” spanking and my memory is quickly refreshed.
In my world, FLR isn’t a hot practice out of a fantasy blog. It’s a consciously adopted practice that gives Mrs. Lion real and permanent authority. That’s plenty. We are working hard to make it a consistent part of our lives.