Training Wheels Off?

Sunday night we had a rather messy Chinese dinner and ate it in bed. We spent the entire day being lazy and watched TV while we snuggled under the covers. I was wearing a t-shirt to keep me a bit warmer. You won’t be surprised to learn that I managed to get a bit of my dinner on my t-shirt.

The ever-vigilant Mrs. Lion noticed the slip and let me know I would be punished. I argued a bit that maybe food on my clothes is not really a spanking offense.She said she would consider my suggestion. Later, she got out the very nasty rubber paddle and administered a painful spanking. Ever the helpful lion, I told Mrs. Lion that the spanking really hurt. She smiled and said, “Of course it did. It’s supposed to.”

I can’t argue with her logic. Something was different. I didn’t feel any sexual excitement at the idea of a spanking. I didn’t want to be spanked on any level. Perhaps that is progress. I’ve learned that there is nothing even mildly arousing about being spanked. I didn’t want Mrs. Lion to spank me.

Of course I submitted when she told me to roll over. I hated every second of it. It made me wonder why I asked for this in the first place. Is it too late for me to change my mind? The answer to that is obvious, even to me. It’s way too late. The next question is whether it’s time to take the training wheels off and reserve spanking for more serious offenses? I am not a bit confident about suggesting it is time to do that.

Mrs. Lion is doing very well in her role. It seems that she has found a comfortable balance of her own. I know it still feels artificial to both of us. We don’t have the childhood experience that would make discipline feel more natural. Even though I absolutely didn’t want to be spanked. I felt no desire to resist.

I didn’t feel guilty about getting a spot on my shirt. But I knew I made a mistake and would pay for it. Obviously, something as trivial as a spot on my shirt wouldn’t provoke guilt. But I know it is an area of improvement for me. My spanking made that crystal clear to me.

In fairness, Mrs. Lion didn’t make the spanking as severe as she has for other offenses. It hurt a lot and made me yelp and scream, but it didn’t go on as long as others I have suffered. It served two purposes: it reminded me to be more careful when I eat. It reinforced Mrs. Lion’s role as disciplining wife. Nope. We shouldn’t take off the training wheels quite yet.

8 Comments

  1. Author

    I cannot emphasize this too much. Allow your wife to determine why you are spanked, when you are spanked and where.She is slowly feeling her way, developing her style and establishing her standards.You are well on your way to understanding what it is to be a husband under your wife’s discipline ( emphasis on ” her discipline”). Don’t screw it up. Like a few others you may come to regret what you asked for but you will be a better and happier man for it.
    Susan

    1. Author

      I agree with you completely. Mrs. Lion is very slowly taking over. The rules we have are to bridge the gap between an “external” structure and the future state where she does just what you said. How could I screw this up?

  2. Author

    I understand the spankings and I see the progress of Mrs. Lion seeing and initiating the request the effective way this has gotten you two closer and engaging outside of husband and wife roles and making it a relationship between you two. But like everything else on the internet it does at time seem one sided, like the comment by Susan you will be a happier man for it? Are you a happier man? Or are you a happier husband? Is your relationship stronger cause Mrs. Lion is physically showing her love like most men prefer physical to emotional. What about Mrs. Lion will she be a happier woman for it? she did not ask for this but she has gone along with it, what are your thoughts on what Susan has said will you be a happier man for your wife either paying more attention to you or are you happier cause your wife is becoming more dominant than you and what about the opposite is Mrs. Lion becoming a better Woman for this? Did she need this to become happier as like Susan said you can only become a happier man when your wife disciplines you?
    And to stick the post you said you didn’t feel any guilt does that mean you have grown the relationship to a point that you two are connecting at a deeper level then when you started that you actually feel more loved than resentfullness for pitty offenses and maybe you feel happier cause you two are at a point that you worked for?

    1. Author

      Some good points. I am a happier man. I can’t say it is due to the domestic discipline. I am also a happier husband. I agree with you that a good deal of my happiness comes from the physical expression of her feelings. I am not sure I will be a “better man”. I was doing fine before we started all this. I am certainly a better husband. This is largely due to the fact that Mrs. Lion lets me know how she feels about what I do. We are eliminating the “festering” feelings Mrs. Lion harbored in the past.

      I like that my lioness is becoming more dominant. I feel this as her being more involved with me and with us. I don’t resent being punished for petty offenses. I interpret the punishment as greater involvement with me. I also see it as Mrs. Lion communicating with me in a way I can’t ignore or minimize. I can try to turn things around and rationalize that they are not my fault. Mrs. Lion only punished me once for doing this. But it is something that I need corrected. The punishment for trivial rules is critical for our growth. Mrs. Lion learns that she can safely correct me in strong physical terms. I learn to accept correction without any resistance.

      Susan’s comment is a bit simplistic. I think Anonymous brought up the more central questions. Did I answer everything from my perspective?

      1. Author

        Yes and thank you internet is hard to get detail answers and I like your blog cause I see both sides and there is more reality than made up fiction or just fantasy based like a lot of other blogs on the internet, but yes and thank you for answering all the questions I have I ask a lot sometimes, there is one thing I just wounder about with your growth or anyone’s growth in this type of relationship you have said before you and Mrs. Lion are husband and wife first before anything else and like any relationship it takes work on all levels even ones you don’t think of or never thought was something you had to work on, so when you say — “Mrs. Lion learns that she can safely correct me in strong physical terms. I learn to accept correction without any resistance.”
        If you had to take away any sexual based request or fantasy driven desires could you say that this is a way to work on walking in the other persons shoes to see it from the other persons perspective or to learn and apply new skills strictly for growing the relationship by trying something completely new or foreign to what you thought a relationship or marriage needed? I always ask the wife who says she spanks her husband cause he needs it or has done something wrong, it’s very one sided and if the two are equal in the relationship why does she not say she does things wrong that there are things she needs to work on and if she does do something wrong how does she want her husband to deal with it? i think the person who ask for help should get help strictly to what they say they need help with example spilling food on shirt or a bad trait being rude or talkin over someone, my fiancée hates it when I talk during movies or shows especially ones I don’t want to watch, but if she thinks it’s a problem then I need to understand it’s a problem and with her help work on it, but what about her if she’s to passive in areas she shouldn’t like a marriage or bedroom or her husband if the two are equal she should have no reason to be passive or scared so I see what you mean by growth and to me that growth is relationship first no wife should be scared or passive to do something for or too there husband especially if they ask for it and the husband should be able to help his wife work on areas of growth by doing little things she ask and to give her help by giving her more control to learn how to and that it’s okay to be more assertive and not be afraid. So I guess my real question is do you think in the future will everything balance out and the two of you can stop the enforced chasity and the spankings and still be the same two people that you are now and worked for and have the same relationship without the sexual stuff? Let me know if that’s to long or doesn’t make sense?

        1. Author

          First of all, there is no fantasy or fiction on our blog. We report our thoughts and actions, though I sometimes throw in a silly, obviously untrue post now and then just for fun. You may be overthinking all this stuff. So far, we’ve tried enforced chastity and domestic discipline at my request. I was turned on by the sexual game aspect of both. The reality of domestic discipline is part game (rules and penalties), but the punishments are very real and unpleasant. Enforced chastity is fun for both of us.

          Both practices have shown value to us as a couple. I write a lot about that. Neither is a form of therapy to stop once we are “cured” as you imply. They’re integral parts of our lives now. We’ve discussed whether the chastity device, for example, is needed any longer. We both believe there is very little chance we will regress to our prior isolation. I think it is needed for the same reason we need our wedding rings. If I took my ring off I would still be married and would remain faithful to Mrs. Lion. But I wear it as a symbol of that commitment to her. The chastity device is actually more useful than the ring. I won’t masturbate if it isn’t on, but wearing it provides us with a ritual (unlocking me, sexual activity, and relocking) that we both enjoy. I like bondage and the sense of being “forced”. The chastity device satisfies that too.

          Just because something causes a change, doesn’t mean it is no longer needed after the change has been made. I don’t see Mrs. Lion ever stopping her role as disciplining wife. Domestic discipline is part of our relationship now. Even when we reach the nirvana of perfect communications, her paddle will still come out when she needs to correct me. I’m comfortable with this.

  3. Author

    That makes sense and I wasn’t trying to say cure or fix i can see how that can be taken, I may be overthinking just a little I admit that, and no I’m just very interested in this tactic or lifestyle or relationship what ever you want to call it but since this is something that is not normal or ever taught as a relationship growing up its just understandable to have questions about it, and the title about this one is Training wheels off? You end saying not yet, I for my self don’t know if I personally would want to go and take of training wheels i think like Suzan said don’t push it if I was getting the attention and participation from my spouse I would worry if I would push to hard or to fast, but for you what would taking the training wheels off be like? For example just making things up now what if the rule and punishment did its work and you never ever spill on your self ever agian you learned your lesson and you never do that would you have to come up with new rules or start working on something new that you want to focus on?

    1. Author

      Things are progressing nicely. I’m sure I will learn to be neater eating and to interrupt less. My expectation is that there will be less and less need for punishment. I’m not perfect, so I’m pretty sure the paddles won’t gather too much dust. But if I end up only needing a few spankings a year, I won’t mind at all. I can always ask for a play spanking. That takes care of my spanking yah yah’s much less painfully.

      I expect that over time, Mrs. Lion will find other corrections to make. I also expect that spanking won’t be the only punishment in her arsenal. She’s already adopted zapping me with the training collar if I forget to wear it when we go out. I did that the other night and when we got home I had to put it on and get some shocks. They weren’t particularly bad at all. It may be she will need to revert to the paddle to remind me not to forget it.

      Domestic discipline for us will evolve over time. We have the relatively trivial rules now because neither of us has any childhood experience with punishments. So the “training wheels” are opportunities to explore effective physical punishment. I think we both need practice. There’s no rush. But I do think that over time, I will be punished less often.

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