We go home today. This trip has been pretty much like every other one we’ve taken in the past. Yes, I missed my TV. Watching DVD’s is fun, but not the same thing. Like our other trips, we’ve had fun prowling around the area. We both like seeing what’s around the next turn or over that hill over there.
I can’t help with the driving, but then on most trips, Mrs. Lion has the wheel.This tends to tire her out. Worse, she has a cold that tires her more. That’s this trip’s reason for no play. I’m writing this on the morning before you read this. Who knows? Maybe some fun for me tonight.
I don’t think my lioness really likes to do sexual things with me. It’s understandable. The activity is strictly one way. So, it follows that a vacation would be an escape from work. I’m work. It’s probably too much to expect her to actually have fun playing with me. I know from my experience as a top, play is work. The rewards aren’t sexual for her. There may be some emotional rewards, but clearly they aren’t very big.
Mrs. Lion and I represent an extreme end of the continuum of differing sexual interest. Sex in any form is supposed to be reciprocal. Differences in libido generate stress. If the difference in interest is too great, the relationship will suffer.
My introduction of enforced chastity was an attempt to build a sexual bridge across the chasm in our sexual interests. It works when we do it. At least it has up to now. Vacations are the clearest indications of what’s working and what isn’t. We both love the time together and our little adventures. It’s not too surprising that sex for me, at least in the form of play disappears. After all, that is work.
As far as I can tell, the only real solution is to find something that makes sex with me something rewarding for Mrs. Lion. If it was something she really enjoyed, vacation would always include a lot of it. Other couples behave that way.
One reason I like the satellite TV so much is that it fills hours that are essentially empty while we are in our trailer. I wait, hoping Mrs. Lion will decide it’s time for sexual play. Once, maybe twice a trip she does some CBT and jerks me off.
That sounds horrible. It isn’t. I like it. What’s really bothering me is s our lack of sexual connection. I can’t pretend it doesn’t hurt. I know Mrs. Lion will tell me that she will try to do better. I also know she will be thinking of her iPad, Facebook, and games she likes to play. They relax her and make her laugh.
Vacations, as it turns out, can be very instructive. While I’m writing, she’s playing games on her iPad. I wish she would think of playing with me the same way. She looks forward to Facebook and those games. She obviously missed them when she kept her promise to stay out of her iPad. She is clearly happier now.
Maybe this is why I don’t like these trips. Reality smacks me in the face. The artifact of our power exchange is on my dresser at home. I can’t lose myself in the 275 satellite channels. We have some under-bed restraints. We’ve used them twice. I trip over them more than that times a day.
I have no doubt that we’ll do something sexual tonight. We always do after I write a post about missing sex. But take note of how Mrs. Lion writes about it. Look back at former posts. She does a great job of reporting. She lets you know that I had fun. But not once did she say she enjoyed it. Why did it take me this long to realize? I’ve been blinded by my wish that we would both have fun.
You can learn a lot on a vacation.