What’s Real?

“Suck my cock!” What would happen if i said that to Mrs. Lion? Thoughts about this vary. Julie posed this as an example of something she would punish her husband for saying, but if a man she submitted to said it, she would simply obey. This came up in the context of respect for the submissive partner.

When I submitted to Mrs. Lion, did I lose my “he man” rights to demand sexual obedience from Mrs. Lion? That’s an odd question in the twenty-first century. The only time I would ever demand something like that would be in the context of a scene where I am dominant. I would never do it in any other situation. As a vanilla husband, much less a submissive one, I have no right to make such a demand.

In the context of 24/7 roles like ours, sexual demands are either something to be laughed at or punished. There is so much about dominance and submission that appear one way, but actually are nearly opposite in fact. This example is a very vivid illustration of that fact. It’s obviously disrespectful or silly for me to seriously demand a blowjob. Mrs. Lion is actually happy to give me one. She loves sucking my cock.

However, as my disciplining wife, she would have to be offended by such a macho request. Such disrespect! I would require immediate punishment. I don’t think that would offend her at all if you take out her role. She might consider it an odd way for me to tell her I want it, but she would most likely say, “What a good idea!”

Even if no one wants to admit it, FLR, domestic discipline, and male chastity are all joint decisions by the people involved. These are consensual practices. I want Mrs. Lion to be in charge, lock up my cock, and punish me as she wishes. I may hate some of the things she does or makes me do, but I know that this is all by mutual agreement.

So, when it comes to matters of keeping or losing respect, I always refer back to roles. I don’t think there is no coming back if one or both of us decide to return to a full partnership. If my lioness actually lost respect for me due to something we are doing, she would have to question whether or not she wants to be my wife, much less continue our power exchange.

So, when Julie pointed out that if her husband told her to suck his cock that she would punish him, I suggest that is because someone in her role would never  put up with that from her submissive. If I told her to suck my cock, I’m sure she would be massively offended and potentially sock me in the nose. But if John, a man she submits to, gives her that order, she is on her knees instantly.

As someone who has been in the dominant role for almost 25 years, I’ve made that demand of women submitting to me many times. Their response was to immediately get to work. I never asked an acquaintance or friend for such service. It would be plain stupid.

So, if a woman agrees to dominate her husband, the power exchange would make it foolish, even dangerous, to make any such demands. I don’t think that shows she has lost respect for him. It just means it’s wrong for someone with her role to accept such behavior from her submissive partner. Let the debate begin!

 

Caged male half of a happy couple practicing enforced male chastity and domestic discipline. Locked since 1/2014. Domestic discipline 3/2015. Lion’s first mouth soaping was 7/17.

10 comments on “What’s Real?
  1. Julie says:

    IMO, sort of. I’ve been in “vanilla” relationships (before david) where part of the non pre-negotiated acts is the man grabbing my hair, pulling me to him, and demanding “his due”. “Cmon, baby, be a good girl, suck my cock.” Not every guy can pull this off. If he’s a dork he gets slapped in the face and our evening would end early. Never happened in fact. Dorks lack this kind of confidence. But if he’s supremely confident, legit takes charge in bed, built me up to it, and built for it, I went along like the greedy little slut I was and am! I know, not very PC, a bit rapey in fact. But there are men like this (none of them read this blog!), and that behaviour can turn a gal on as well. Most vanilla guys would love to dominate a woman sexually, and many vanilla women want them to. One of David’s trainers loved when her partner grabs her hair and fucks her hard, or chokes her while fucking her. She wanted them to just do it, and not have them ask permission to. NOT promoting rape! This is a chosen sexual partner we’re talking about (albeit a tinder one night stand). If david did that, ha! He doesn’t garner that kind of “sexual respect” from me. Nope. A week 24×7 in panties and a nice long throat fucking as punishment. Ha ha! Teach the little bitch who’s in charge in the sack!

    • Caged Lion says:

      For most of my life I was one of those guys. So, at least one reads this blog :). Before I had any idea what BDSM was, women for some reason always did what I told them. I never talked crudly or in the classic dom voice. I would just say, “I would like you to suck my cock,” in a convcersational tone accompanied by a smile. The result was always immediate compliance. I never understood why I always had sex on the first date, but I did. This isn’t bragging, it’s just how things happened. I figured it was how sex always worked. I was a virgin until I was 19. I went to an all-boys boarding school. I didn’t even have a clear idea what a vagina looked like. Women’s reactions to me at first scared me. I had no idea what they wanted. My freshman year in college a senor, very pretty and one of the 250 women in a school of 10,000, attached herself to me. I managed to figure out how to play with her breasts, but had no idea how to go further. She stayed with me anyway, but got off with another student with much more experience.

      I don’t think I am all that good looking. I just imagine it is chemistry. My relationship just ending when I met Mrs. Lion was with a woman who lived with me as my slave. What can I tell you? At that point I was just plain tired of being in charge. My Yang needed a Yin injection. Mrs. Lion and I were vanilla for quite some time. Yes, we had sex on the first date. We fell in love and after that I told her I wanted to be spanked. She is a very good student.

      My point is that how you tell a woman to suck your cock doesn’t matter as long as she does it. Women attracted to macho construction workers wouldn’t find me attractive. I’m not a nerd. I’m a leader who is capable of getting what he wants. My submission is a conscious decision, not part of my emotional makeup. I struggle with that. I’ve told lots of women to suck my cock over the years. None have refused. I never imagined any would. I guess I am lucky.

      • Julie says:

        Yes, it’s not an inherent part of one’s makeup as a male, it’s also situational. As long as you’re being pantied and spanked by me, you are not to be macho else be consequenced.

        • Caged Lion says:

          That makes perfect sense. I knew going in that I would have to repress parts of my nature in favor of fulfilling another need. I think now I have to say, “Please suck my cock, Ma’am” 🙂

        • Stew says:

          So is there a difference for you between alpha beta male vs submissive dominant male? Can you date a Beta quiet sweet kind nurturing male and still allow him to say suck my cock with no consequences vs a Big strong alpha male who in all respects demands respect in the real world but if he agrees to submit to you he cannot be allowed to show any dominant traits toward you or else face the consequences? What about could you have the opposite could you submit to someone that is for arguments sake the most beta male the kindest sweetest loving expresses there emotions someone you could easily push around doesn’t stick up for them selves but if you agreed to submit to them and them be your dominant you would with no hesitation drop to your knees and suck ther cock if they told you to?

          • Julie says:

            I could date a whole lot of different guys. But I’m madly in love with, and gave myself to, one who prefers the submissive side. If he wants to play at being dominant from time to time, I could play a bit that way, sure.

  2. Stew says:

    So if I understand correctly, no matter what you don’t want to break the agreement you asked for by having a power exchange and you as the submissive have already decided for your dominant partner that they should punish you if you act on a natural sexual urge that you had and did before beginning the power exchange?
    Does Mrs Lion feel the same as Julie in this respect does she want you to be her little bitch and always be the panty wearing beta male who can’t bring any sexual satisfaction to his own wife? I mean does she want you to always be so submissive, you said she loves sucking your cock but not if you asked her to cause that takes away from the power exchange? So that’s like if Mrs lion likes her hair being pulled during sex she needs to demand and command you to pull her hair or else if you do it with out her telling you to she needs to punish you?
    I just would like to know if Julie’s husband said suck my cock I’m horny I don’t want to be submissive today and clearly said that he doesn’t want to be submissive for one day one blow job ten minutes of sucking does that end the entire power exchange that they had for years does stepping out of the power exchange from time to time really end it? If you just whent to Mrs lion and said suck my cock would she say sorry I’m done being your dominant or would she tell you to go get ready for spanking and when you didn’t move and she knew you were serious about her sucking your cock would she?

    • Caged Lion says:

      Like everything else in life, things aren’t black or white. Mrs Lion does not ever want me to be her bitch. We have rules that I have agreed to follow. One is that I can’t masturbate or have sex with anyone but her. I’ve never broken that rule and I’m sure I won’t. If I break any rule, I will be punished. That too, is our agreement. There is nothing that prevents me from being aggressive sexually if that is what she wants. I don’t think I would ever say that I don’t want to be submissive today. If I did, I hope Mrs. Lion would say, “Tough shit.” We regularly step out of the power exchange on all sorts of things. We are partners, just not equal partners. I act independently almost all the time. I suggest you go back and read our posts from the beginning…well not all 2,300 of them, but enough to understand our evolution. What we are doing serves us well. We are both evolving. I expect that Mrs. Lion will be stricter with me. But that doesn’t mean I lose my independence and masculinity.Take a look at our history.

What do you think?