There are times when I just can’t seem to get in the same neighborhood as an orgasm. This is one of those times. Mrs. Lion has tried all her tricks: oral, handjob, and even the Magic Wand. Yes, I get hard. I enjoy the sensation. But I just can’t seem to get close to the edge. It feels like there is a wall between arousal and orgasm. Maybe it isn’t a wall. There isn’t a hard boundary. It’s just like I go so far and then the excitement recedes. I half expect I am getting soft.
I’m not exactly frustrated. If the excitement feels like it is going away, there is no desire to go back. I do feel badly. I know Mrs. Lion has tried hard. I love getting almost to the summit. It’s disappointing. In the past, the Magic Wand and Mrs. Lion’s hands could get me over that wall. Not this time. I know this has happened before. It should pass in a few days. But I can’t help but feel the loss.
I got some bad news last week. The surgeon who fixed my rotator cuff thinks the operation failed. Based on my physical therapy difficulties, he believed his repair didn’t work. Considering the amount of suffering, work loss, and expense this surgery cost, I am very disappointed. I am not completely sure he is right. I asked him to schedule another MRI this week. It will show exactly what the condition of my shoulder is. Even if the repair failed, the terrible pain I had after the injury is gone. He shaved some bones and did other work that makes my joint function more comfortably. I still have significant pain, but it is probably going to disappear over time. I just won’t have full use of my arm.
Perhaps my loss of sexual ability is linked to the bad news. It’s a reasonable connection. This is one of those times that understanding isn’t very helpful. I don’t think there is anything I can do to fix either situation. I also find myself impatient with my chastity device. It’s not to blame, of course, for my inability to get very aroused. But it is absolutely useless right now. All it does is make it difficult for me to pee. It’s primary function: preventing me from sexual satisfaction has been taken up by the soft wall that is effectively preventing me from having any sexual fun.
Of course, the soft wall might melt away. The Jail Bird chastity device isn’t going anywhere. The Jail Bird can be removed by Mrs. Lion. Neither of us can do anything about the wall.