I Admit I Need It

male in frilly panties
Frilly thong like the ones I have. This isn’t me. This pair is at a site devoted to female undies for men. Click image to go there.

I worked from home yesterday. Good thing. Mrs. Lion decided I needed to spend the day in diapers. It’s also a good thing I have overnight pull-ups. She ordered me to pee twice, then change the diaper. That gives me some time in a dry diaper. I like that, but two pees are a lot to load into a diaper before it comes off. The overnights handle that easily. This may be too much information for you. If it is, I apologize.

As you might imagine, I’m not very happy when wearing a diaper.

That’s why Mrs. Lion’s does it.

It’s hard to forget who’s in charge when sitting in a diaper; particularly a wet one. On Sunday night Mrs. Lion told me that she wanted me to wear panties for the day, but couldn’t find them in my underwear drawer. I told her where they are for future reference. That’s when she told me about my Monday in a diaper.

This attention is very welcome. It’s been at least four weeks since I’ve earned a spanking, so aside from edging and some CBT, Mrs. Lion hasn’t asserted her power in a non-sexual way. That changed yesterday.

I don’t think I am a masochist; at least not as far as panties and diapers are concerned. But I do want Mrs. Lion to force me to wear them. In fact, even though it isn’t fun for me, I want more. Does this have to do with the fact that I’ve been cage-free for six months? I don’t think so. I felt the same way while caged.

Maybe I shouldn’t be overthinking this. I know that many of my fantasies involve me be being sexually humiliated. Diapers and panties certainly fit that requirement. Mrs. Lion and I haven’t talked much about this aspect of my personality in recent times. The last time I wrote about my interest in diapers was in September 2016 (post). Panties came up a bit more recently in September 2017 (post). Sadly, neither are frequently discussed nor used.

I don’t think that means humiliation play isn’t important. Like most things relating  to sexual activity, life intrudes and distracts both of us. That’s one reason we assign specific days for various activities. Monday and Thursday are punishment days. Wednesday is sling day. We discussed making Saturday “maybe” orgasm day. Mrs. Lion isn’t sure about that one.

A better question might be: How important is humiliation to me? It matters quite a bit. It’s the original reason my pubic area was shaved. Its been hairless for many years, principally because I like it and so have my partners. Mrs. Lion also likes it because it’s cleaner. I like it because it exposes me more. It goes to my need for sexual humiliation.

It’s difficult to write about this. Part of me doesn’t want to admit I want this sort of thing. But, it’s undeniable that I do. There is irrefutable evidence of this in our blog. Over the years, I published pictures of my body in humiliating ways. I both love and hate the diapers and panties. It is clearly my kink; and I want more.

5 Comments

  1. Author

    Reading this I wonder: What makes panties humiliating?

    One possible answer is because they are associated with women, and wearing women’s clothing as a man is humiliating. That leads to the next “why?”, and that quickly leads to “because women are less than”.

    I’m pretty certain that’s not the only possible answer though.

    1. Author

      It may be that wearing women’s underwear is odd and therefore humiliating. It makes me feel different and therefore self conscious.

  2. Author

    Hi Caged Lion, i follow you on twitter too. Every time you expose more of who you are, i get jealous as some of the feelings you express are some i have never found words for. So for that i that you. I enjoy women’s panties because of the way the feel on my shaved area. Like you mine has been shaved for so long i can’t remember when i started. my wife of 40 plus years left me because she is trying to find herself and dosen’t want to be a mother or grand mother anymore. So i start a new journey and remain close to our children and theirs. Thanks for you loving relationship and willingness of both of You for sharing.

    1. Author

      > my wife of 40 plus years left me because she is trying to find herself

      Oh that’s rough. I’m pretty certain she’s got reasons, but that’s still rough.

      I liked Granny Weatherwax’s (a Discworld character in the Terry Pratchett books) reaction to this question of finding oneself. Picture, if you will, that she’s in some after-life-ish wasteland, an endless desert, and she’s being told by Death that she can’t come out until she’s found herself. She squints, asks suspiciously whether that’s a trick question, is told “NO” and proceeds to thump herself on the chest and proclaim “I’m right here.”

      Sir Terry had a way of expressing deep thoughts within funny moments. I miss him.

  3. Author

    Yes. One of the tougher aspects of our FLR/Chaste lifestyle is my admission to desiring mild humiliation. A huge part of why I look forward to Discipline day….

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