It Actually Works!
Change is a sneaky critter. It often bites you when your attention is elsewhere. My focus on our FLR with discipline has been on how things happen. I’ve looked at the intensity, or lack of it, of my punishments. I’ve thought about the implications of not wearing a chastity device. I’ve considered how submissive I do or don’t feel. The one thing I haven’t looked at is the objective results of our power exchange.
We are starting our fifth year in this adventure. There’s been a lot of progress. In the early years, it was about what we wanted and how we could do it. You can read back posts to learn about our trials and tribulations. Most of them were about technique. I admit that I missed the most significant aspect of our power exchange: it’s working.
I have a few rules. I’m not to spill food on my shirt. I have to wait for Mrs. Lion to eat before I do. I’m not to interrupt. I’m to be naked at home, and I may never masturbate. The food-spilling rule was designed to give us numerous chances to observe an infraction and then punish it. It worked very well that way. I was punished almost every week. I’m not the neatest eater.
That’s changed. I didn’t consciously set out to avoid getting food on my shirt. I never wanted to do that. It just seemed to happen. Weeks can go by without a spill. Similarly, again without conscious effort, I wait for Mrs. Lion to eat first or give me permission to start. I rarely miss. Weeks can go by without a punishment. It isn’t because Mrs. Lion isn’t observant. She is. I’m just not breaking those rules.
I don’t think it’s fear of punishment. Mrs. Lion’s spankings sting but are short and well within my ability to manage them. Apparently that doesn’t matter. They are effective. I’m being conditioned to follow my rules. The key is consistent enforcement. I think that the spankings focus my attention on my error. I subconsciously want to correct it; and I do. I’m being trained!
This was my fantasy. But I never imagined reality could actually fulfill it. It did without my conscious help. Holy crap!
I havn’t needed correction for being naked at home. I just can’t imagine anything else.
I don’t masturbate. I haven’t since January 2014 when I did it while Mrs. Lion watched. I’ve wanted to do it, but I don’t. It’s conditioned out of my sexual vocabulary.
I have one rule that isn’t enforced: interrupting. I still do it. Again, it isn’t conscious disobedience. I just do it.
I think our current state is Lions 2.0. We’ve successfully proven enforced chastity and FLR with discipline. I’m very surprised at how successful we are. It’s time to consider 3.0. This, in my view, is where we use the proven techniques to further enhance my behavior and obedience.
Now that punishment is fairly rare, I suggest that when I do need it, Mrs. Lion should be much more severe. I think that dialing up intensity will have two benefits: it will provide me with a much more memorable experience and should speed conditioning, and it will improve my ability to submit.
Lioness 3.0 might want to enforce interrupting with the same consistency she has shown dealing with my other rules. I really want to be conditioned to stop doing this. It will help me in a lot of situations outside of home.
Speaking of severity, I think it’s time to deal much more severely with repeat offenses. There’s no question that over time I will “forget” a rule now and then. I’m not suggesting those offenses get the most severe punishment. They just need a strong reminder to recharge my obedience. However, repeating an offense only a short time after being corrected needs much more serious attention.
That is a big change for us. I’m curious to see how that will change the way I am trained. I’ve read that this is the traditional way to handle such things. I suggest we find out if it works for us. I also suggest that we consider some new rules to further refine my behavior. Mrs. Lion and I can discuss possibilities.
It’s fair to consider the end game of all this. Is the objective to turn me into a obedient submissive who surrenders decisions to his partner? I don’t think so. Neither of us wants this. Should we consider my training a serious part of our relationship? I have mixed feelings here. In my view from the bottom, I think that the FLR with discipline needs to be treated seriously. After all, we don’t want that to be our BDSM play. But I don’t want this to make or break for our marriage.
If, for some reason, we decide to stop or reduce the level of 3.0’s authority, I don’t want that to hurt our relationship. We will be together for the rest of our lives. I suspect that the paddle and punishments will always be there too. We have passed the point of no return. But our love is first. Anything else is a poor second.
Note: I had not read Mrs. Lion’s post for yesterday when I wrote this. She hadn’t seen mine either. Great minds.