Sometimes I temporarily forget that 2.0 is here to stay. The other night I growled a bit about being back in my chastity device. There are times when it just feels so — necessary. At those times I like to recall it was my idea to be locked up. Mrs. Lion’s reply was,
She delivers statement like this in a soft, even tone. She’s equally mater-of-fact about punishing me. Yes, she’s a laid-back lioness most of the time, anyway. It’s always surprising to me that at times when I am yelping loudly, she calmly continues with her beating as though she was doing nothing more difficult than commenting on a post in Facebook.
In the past, I’ve interpreted her even tones with a lack of interest in what she is doing. You know, the same sort of tone affected when completing a chore. “Yes, dear, I’m doing the laundry.” The difference being that instead of laundry, beating my butt is the chore at hand. If we had a spanking machine, she would quietly set the intensity and duration and then go off to take care of her next task. Since we don’t have that particular kind of automation, she handles the manual task the same way.
She handles butt plugs, pegging, and edging me the same way. She quietly issues instructions and then goes to work. When she edges me, she isn’t exactly indifferent. She likes to make comments like,
“You were very close.” and “Aww, poor boy, you almost got to come.”
When she’s done with an edging session, she’ll smile sweetly and say,
“Too bad you didn’t make it.”
So sympathetic! Like she had nothing to do with my misfortune. 2.0 has a sense of humor, especially at my expense.
Moments like these reinforce my belief that she actually enjoys our power exchange. Since I am so demonstrative, try being laconic while being beaten with a mean paddle, her calm can be interpreted as disinterest. I’m guilty of making that interpretation.
Mrs. Lion is at a disadvantage; any top is. Delivering punishments, painful play, and penetration are skills, not necessarily emotional connections. I, on the other hand, as the bottom feel more emotionally dependent, especially when receiving painful play or punishment. This isn’t unusual. I experienced it many times when I was on the other end of the paddle.
This isn’t a problem that needs solving. It’s a combination of 2.0’s personality and the obvious difference in how what she does affects us. The better she gets at her skills, the gap grows wider. While she calmly paddles, I scream in pain. That means she’s doing a good job. The louder I get, the better she is doing.
2.0 prefers ironic humor to fake sympathy. I have to admit that I do too. It’s honest as are my yelps and screams. While what we do is consensual, I don’t really like role play. What we do is real. We both like it that way.