Month: July 2018

As usual, Lion wasn’t in the cage an hour before he complained about it. Actually he said he was stupid for wanting to be caged at all. I told him he should have thought of that before he spent money to have the cage shortened. He asked if the cage “does anything” for me. That can either mean does it turn me on or does it make me feel power/ownership. I told him it doesn’t turn me on but it’s necessary for him to wear it. Not the answer he was looking for but what can you do?

This morning he’s reported that it’s very comfortable which is good news if he has to wear it. I told him it was good news because he has to wear it. There is no if. He just laughed at that.

Right now, I suppose, there is no real reason for him to be caged. I gave him an orgasm with the Magic Wand last night. So much for making him wait longer when he’s caged. To be fair, he hadn’t been caged for a few days. But that’s no excuse. I should have made him wait longer.

I don’t have a schedule for him. There’s no magical wait time. He likes a four day wait. That’s not to say he always wants four day waits. That would get boring. I like to keep him guessing.

Another oddity last night was that Lion didn’t want a play spanking. He’s turned down other offers of play spankings lately too. Have I ruined his butt? Is he so used to punishment spankings that a play spanking doesn’t hold the allure it once did? Inquiring minds want to know.

shortened jail bird chastity device

At left, my original 1-1/4 inch Jail Bird. This small cage is already in the microchastity category. At right, the adjusted one that is only 1-inch long. This is the shortest Jail Bird possible.

The concept of enforced male chastity is pretty new. The first practical devices only date back about thirty years. Yes, before that there were devices, but they were generally belts that restricted movement and were wearable only by the most dedicated guys. The CB2000 brought male chastity more mainstream.

Chastity device fitting was the province of the people who made the devices. They had to offer some idea how to measure for proper fit. The thing is that the idea of “proper fit” isn’t as straight-forward as it seems. The general rule device makers follow is that the base ring should be tight enough to prevent slipping off and loose enough to avoid irritation. Fair enough. I have no argument there. Where things get tricky is the cage or tube that contains the penis.

Logically, if the penis container (let’s call it the “cage”) fits the flaccid penis without leaving extra room, it’s a good fit. So, each device maker came up with how to make this measurement. Mature Metal, for example, says to measure the underside of the penis from the place the scrotum attaches along the penis to the tip. Ok. But as we all know, that length varies widely even without considering erections.

In my case, that measurement can vary from barely one inch to 2-1/2 inches.  Which is the correct length for a cage? The point is that most of us have a wide range of flaccid lengths. This variation is one of the main reasons custom cages are sent back for adjustment. There’s nothing wrong with having a cage that sometimes leaves room at the tip. In my experience, that extra room is the main reason that peeing standing up can be an adventure. It also provides some growing space for an attempted erection.

My experience is that a very short cage feels a lot better than you might imagine. In the five years of my experience being locked in a chastity device, I’ve had my Jail Bird shortened twice; first from 1-3/4″ to 1-1/4″ and most recently to just 1″. I guess it is fair to call this level of shortening, microchastity. It’s surprisingly pleasant to wear a device with just a one-inch cage. My urethra is always centered and protrudes a bit from the front opening of the cage. Attempted erections just cause the tissue behind the base ring to expand. There is no discomfort. Nothing shows even under tight clothing.

That doesn’t mean your cage should be just one-inch long. It has to be long enough to contain the head of your penis. The shaft will compress easily. Just think of your cock after a cold swim. It’s tiny. That’s the appropriate length for a microchastity cage. That’s what I’m locked in. I believe it is the future of practical male chastity.

I forgot to lock Lion up last night. His sore spot is gone and I wanted to put the cage back on. My plan was to unlock him every day to make sure that same spot didn’t get sore again. However, with his allergies acting up again, he wasn’t up to playing and I didn’t think about the cage again until we were already in bed.

This morning Lion told me the Jail Bird is back from Mature Metal. It’s just in time for me to lock him up again. Now I shouldn’t need to unlock him every night. I probably will anyway. I’m sure there will be a day now and then that he remains caged but, for the most part, he’ll be free every night.

I never really thought about using the cage as punishment. He wants me to make him wait for an orgasm as punishment. But what if I told him he annoyed me so he wouldn’t be getting unlocked? I know he’d have no recourse. It’s not like he can unlock himself. He can whine but that might add time to his sentence.

Sometimes I snuggle up close, grab the cage and lament that I can’t play with him because there’s this barrier. Inevitably he tells me I can always go get the key. If he’s annoyed me, perhaps I could do the same thing but tell him exactly what I would have done if only I could unlock him. Poor Lion. Trapped by his own actions. It’s sad, really.

Learning can be fun. TV shows like “Sesame Street” have entertained and educated generations of kids. They love the show and don’t really notice that they are learning to read and do arithmetic. The education is buried in entertainment. My adult, sexual fun of enforced male chastity and our female led relationship with discipline (FLRD) is no different.

I’m not going to pretend either of us imagined that this play would have a serious side. For me it’s an opportunity to surrender control for Mrs. Lion. For her, it’s been a way to make me happy. It turns out that there is a significant side effect: I actually effect serious change as a result of these activities. More surprisingly, to me at least, Mrs. Lion also changes.

For example, the first rule Mrs. Lion set for me was to not spill food on my shirt. She picked this because there was no real chance I could avoid doing that fairly often. I don’t take a bath in my food, but at least once or twice a week I did drip something. She wanted this rule because it assured us that we would have frequent opportunities for punishment. We both needed to learn how to incorporated discipline in our marriage.

Predictably, I spilled at least once a week; more often twice. Mrs. Lion got a lot of practice spanking me. She learned to become an effective disciplinarian. As she learned, the penalty for each offense became more painful. What started out at a sexually arousing spanking, turned into an experience I would try to avoid repeating.  After almost four years of FLRD, spankings have crossed into truly disciplinary territory. I work to avoid them.

Practically unnoticed, I have changed. I almost never get food on my shirt. What started as a twice-weekly issue is now extremely rare. I can go a month or more without a spot. I have learned to eat more neatly. I don’t think Mrs. Lion expected that change. I certainly didn’t.

Changes aren’t limited to spots on my shirt. Another rule was to always wait for Mrs. Lion to eat first. I had to wait until she started or she gave me permission to eat. For quite a while I received at least one spanking a week for forgetting. Now, mistakes are incredibly rare. Perhaps more interesting, Mrs. Lion has been “trained” to be very aware of my behavior. She spots any spills or times I eat first. In fact, her awareness is so acute that when she went across country to visit her kids, she was consciously aware if anyone ate before her.

Our power exchange has changed us. Mrs. Lion has learned to be a consistent and strict disciplinary wife. What started as a playful accommodation of my kinky wishes has become an integrated part of her personality. I’m not saying that she doesn’t feel she is doing all this because I want it. She is. But, as her visit to her kids proved, her role has also become part of who she is.

Since I have been well conditioned to obey my rules, disciplinary opportunities are few and far between. Of course, that’s good news. It’s also an opportunity to make use of our disciplinary relationship to further “improve” me. We have a no-interrupting rule which is almost never enforced. It seems that if I can change as the result of Mrs. Lion’s consistent attention, I can get rid of this bad habit as well.

I don’t expect her to read this and exclaim, “Ah Ha! Now I can make him do anything I want.” That’s silly. She wouldn’t have married me if I were a piece of clay waiting for her to mold me into her submissive dream man. That’s silly. She obviously liked me the way I was before we started FLRD. It’s difficult for her to identify ways I can improve. It’s even more difficult to make and enforce a rule. None of this is easy for either of us.

I think we gain a lot from our FLRD. Aside from modifying my behavior, our intimacy has improved. Also, the ever-more-intense punishments send a valuable lesson to each of us. I’m learning that there are real consequences to carelessness or misbehavior. Mrs. Lion is learning that she can be an effective disciplinarian. While punishing me isn’t fun, it’s helping me change in positive ways.

Even making me wear a chastity device helps us both. It teaches me that I may start something, but I can’t stop it when I get tired of it or don’t like it. It helps Mrs. Lion remember her role as my disciplining wife. The presence of the change is a reminder to us both that we want and need consistency. It’s a symbol of her control over me.

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