Speak Softly and Carry a Big Stick

travel spanking paddle

We made this paddle to hang by the door in our camper.

I have a lot of paddles at my disposal. There’s a bag of toys in the camper with several paddles as well as the His/Hers paddle on display. There are paddles downstairs in the dungeon. There are paddles under the bed and paddles in the spare bedroom. No matter where I am, I have ready access to a paddle. I even used to keep one in my bag for when we were out. That one was mostly for show since I only swatted Lion once when we were out.

The point is, I have a paddle for every occasion. Last night I chose a small one. The problem with small ones is that they don’t have the heft of a larger one. Actually, that’s not entirely true. Some of the heft comes from the species of wood. However, a small paddle tends to exert less force because of its size. I never made it past biology in high school so I don’t know the name of the principle, but it might have something to do with a lever and fulcrum. (Don’t hate me if I got it wrong. I should get some points for watching The Big Bang Theory every week for its entire run.) I mean, a longer paddle is able to deliver more force because of a longer swing.

Anyway, last night’s swats were hampered by the shorter paddle. I got Lion’s cheeks rosy but probably not as rosy as I could have. I wasn’t hitting harder so I didn’t compensate for the length of the paddle. This is not to say he didn’t feel those swats. He was yelping right away. But he didn’t try to get away. That’s what leads me to believe it wasn’t as severe a punishment as it could have been. On the other hand, there have been times I’ve felt I needed to use a baseball bat or cricket bat to get my point across. His butt just seems oblivious to pain sometimes.

We didn’t fare much better in the edging department either. Lion has yet another sore spot. He thinks this one may have happened when the new cage was going on or coming off. I’m not sure. It’s similar to sore spots he got prior to receiving the new cage. Apparently my weenie is far more sensitive than his buns are.

Tonight will be Lion’s last punishment from his series of food spillage infractions. Those all occurred around the time we were away for Memorial Day. He’s been fairly good since then. Maybe he only spills things when there’s a holiday. Today is Flag Day. Perhaps he’ll commit an offense tonight. Personally, I think he’ll make it till Sunday before he gets himself into trouble again. I’ll have to be more diligent about handling his punishments in a more timely manner.

What do you think?