Maybe I Should Just Flip A Coin

There hasn’t been much sexual activity around here. I’m taking a powerful drug that makes me sleepy and for all I know less interested in sex. Mrs. Lion is tired because she’s not sleeping well. We’re both worried about my health and our upcoming move. It’s not for lack of trying. Mrs. Lion snuggled and played with me on Monday night. I got pretty excited. I just couldn’t get close to the edge it all. I’m not complaining. It felt great.

I’m also not eating very much. That’s not the healthiest thing, but I welcome the weight loss. It’s hard to find silver linings at times like this. But there is one that absolutely undeniable: Mrs. Lion and I have each other. That’s the treasure of more value than anything else we can think of. Meanwhile, it’s a little tough around here. I’m usually a very positive person. All the stuff is making it very hard for me to believe things are going to get better.

The glaucoma specialist I’ve been seeing operated on my left eye almost 4 months ago. He put in a drainage tube which controls the pressure and shortly after the surgery, something started bleeding inside the eye. He sure it isn’t his fault. Since he’s the only one who was mucking around there, I can’t imagine who he wants to blame. In any case, the blood managed to find its way to the back of my eye and get into the jelly stuff that fills it. It takes a very long time to get eliminated from the sticky jelly. I still can’t see out of my left eye.

Meanwhile, the pressure in my right eye has gone up and the standard eyedrops don’t seem to be keeping it under control. Surgery is required there. The genius surgeon wants me to get a different kind of operation in the right eye. It’s scheduled for Thursday. One of the known common complications is limited bleeding as part of this process. As I have learned, bleeding equals no vision. In the case of this new operation the blood will dissipate within a week or so. That means I could be totally blind for a week or more if I go through with this plan.

To keep the pressure in my right eye down, I’m taking an oral drug with lots of side effects. The main one for me seems to be that it makes me sleepy. The original glaucoma doctor considers this drug unsuitable for any length of time. Apparently he has no trouble with me being blind for any length of time.

An alternative is to operate on the left eye and clear out the jelly so that all that nasty blood is gone and I can see through my left eye. Then, once that vision is clear, operate on the right eye. That would mean I would be on the pressure-lowering oral drug for several more weeks. The surgeon who will be performing the right eye surgery, has no problem with this.

It seems to me that some vision is better than no vision. Since I can’t get a chance to talk with my original specialist, it looks like I’ll have to make the decision for myself. Clearly, there is no clear path to follow. When all this glaucoma stuff started, I decided that I didn’t want to live as a blind lion. I didn’t specify short-term blindness. But I get pretty close to panic imagining losing my sight even for a short time. I’m very close to firing my original glaucoma doctor. That may be the best decision in any case. Welcome to my world.