Wednesday night was something of an occasion. After reading Mrs. Lion’s post yesterday, it seemed to me that she is open to sex for herself. We exchanged a few emails and she confirmed that she was willing to let me give her an oral orgasm. The last time I gave her an orgasm was, I believe, in 2017. She’s consistently said that she wasn’t interested in sex for herself. On Wednesday night after we had settled in, I asked her she was still interested. She said she was if I could manage getting into position without hurting my injured shoulder. I assured her I could. I was going to do it if it dislocated my shoulder.
It was fairly easy for me to position myself between her legs. I began licking. She certainly is delicious! After I had started, she said, “I don’t think I’m going to have an orgasm.”
I said, “I don’t care. This is fun.”
I was thinking that she was being unduly pessimistic. I’m confident of my ability to use my tongue effectively. It took a little while, probably 10 minutes, before her breathing changed. I smiled inwardly, “Oh yeah. She’s going to have an orgasm,” I thought to myself. Sure enough, a few minutes later she came. I was very happy. When I asked her, she said she was too. I was a little surprised she said she enjoyed it. The last time, as I recall, she commented that while it was nice, it was a lot of trouble.
We relaxed for a little while and then she moved between my legs and gave me a great blow job. We then settled back and watched TV with nice tastes in our mouths. I’m not going to make any sweeping generalizations. But I think that Wednesday night taught me and hopefully Mrs. Lion, that you can enjoy sex without being horny. I don’t think either of us have ever thought about that. Mrs. Lion has been saying that she isn’t interested in sex. So, she’s been giving me sex without any for herself. I interpret that to mean that she doesn’t feel any desire for me or anyone else. I get that. What I don’t think either of us understood was that just because desire is absent, enjoying the actual act of having sex is certainly possible.
I’m not quite sure exactly how this will play out. My experience with sex is that it’s always preceded by a desire to have sexual contact. It’s never been that I’m not interested but if a nice orgasm happens by, I’ll enjoy it. This seems to be the case, at least for the moment, for Mrs. Lion. I’m fine with that. It may be that our new pattern is that we discuss some sexual activities, and decide we will do them. It isn’t spontaneous or necessarily romantic. Who says it has to be.
This is absolutely fine with me. One of the problems I had prior to our enforced male chastity was that I had a great deal of trouble initiating sex. Mrs. Lion complained that I never romanced her into a sexual encounter. She was right, I didn’t. After I was locked in a chastity device, our roles essentially reversed. She and she alone decided if and when I got sexual relief. Of course, it didn’t solve the problem that she liked the romantic interlude, but it did eliminate a source of tension between us.
In her post yesterday, Mrs. Lion gave a somewhat different perspective on this. Reading between the Lions (excuse the pun), it appears that Mrs. Lion essentially resigned from sex because I wasn’t very good at initiating it. She’s willing to forgo sex for herself if it means that she has to initiate it. I had assumed that enforced male chastity flipped a switch that took away this source of tension. Instead, it looks like she simply gave up. There was never my intention. It looks like I have inadvertently conditioned her away from sex to avoid the initiation issue. I had no idea.
Mrs. Lion wrote that she has inadvertently conditioned me to only being able to have sex if I’m on my back. I don’t think this is all her fault. Part of it has to do with possible erectile difficulty. One symptom of erectile dysfunction is the inability to sustain an erection during intercourse. I have had a lot of trouble in Lion position (Mrs. Lion on her knees and me behind her). I put it down as the result of so much on-my-back sex. It’s the only position I’ve had for an orgasm in at least seven years. So, I’m probably very well conditioned to coming just in that position. However, Mrs. Lion has her best orgasms in cowgirl position (she on top straddling me). That works out well for both of us. Reverse cowgirl (she straddles me facing my feet) is the best position for me to have an orgasm. Most men have difficulty coming in the cowgirl position.
In recent years, it’s been a little difficult for Mrs. Lion to do either cowgirl or reverse cowgirl. She’s gained a little weight and is a bit out of shape. I’m confident that if she wants to resume, it won’t take her long to get back into condition. I am willing to try Lion position as well. That position affords me access to both her pussy and anus. When we first met, she seemed partial to anal intercourse. I don’t think she’s ever had very much luck coming with me behind her. Cowgirl seems to be her best bet.
In those early days we established a sort of pattern. She knew that I like her to be in charge and being on top of me certainly sends that message. So, she would ride me cowgirl style for a while, allowing herself to have an orgasm or two. Then she would move up my body and I would give her additional orgasms with my tongue. I love that. When she was done, she would dismount and give me a hand job. I really enjoyed that. Occasionally, she would give me a blow job instead. Later, we discovered that I could come if we did reverse cowgirl. She would begin facing me until she had her fill of orgasms. Then she would turn around into the reverse cowgirl position and I would get a chance to come inside her. I love that. She also loves feeling me come inside her.
In more recent times, when she decided I deserved a chance to be inside her, she would mount me in reverse cowgirl position and let me come inside her. She never even got close to an orgasm during those sessions. I think the course is pretty clear. Now that I understand Mrs. Lion would like orgasms and maybe she would enjoy returning to the kind of sex we both had fun with earlier in our relationship, it’s up to me to make it happen.
This isn’t an onerous chore. I’m delighted that we may be able to find our way out of one-way sex and assure pleasure for both of us. I’m going to have to change. Since there is no possibility we are going to stop our enforced male chastity, I can’t reasonably suggest sex that will end up with me ejaculating. I don’t think that’s a problem since the most successful sex we’ve ever had is with Mrs. Lion as the cowgirl who rides me without me coming, and then continues her pleasure over my face. I loved it then and I will love it now. Ride me, cowgirl!
Uh, missionary? Although my wife doesn’t orgasm in this position, it certainly works fine for me. If I get too tired, I can roll us on our sides, so that I’m no longer supporting my own weight, and continue.
There actually was one exception to my wife orgasming during missionary: I was locked at the time, and wearing a RodeoH “strap-on” (actually, a brief) dildo. Although it was essentially the same size as I am hard, she said that it was the novelty of the situation that caused her to orgasm, and it quite surprised her (me too!). I’m looking forward to doing this again, now that it appears that I’ll be locked up for quite a while.
Congratulations on re-discovering sex!
Gee, I thought I discovered sex for the first time! Actually, we are circling back to an old issue which may be responsible for turning off Mrs. Lion. I think we may have come on a compromise in terms of initiation. It isn’t very romantic, but it will work for us. We talk about upcoming activities either here in the blog or in email. If we pre-discuss sex, the only initiating I have to do is ask her if she is ready to go. As it turns out, the default situation for us is that I essentially initiate sex for me. She generally doesn’t go near me until I asked her if she would like to snuggle. When I do, she often says yes. At that point it’s up to her to decide what, if any, sex I get. I did essentially the same thing when I wanted to lick her. We both agreed it worked quite well.