wood chair in resaurant that hurt my spanked bottom
This is the kind of chair in the restaurant where we had dinner on Thursday. My spanked bottom hated sitting in it.

I hope you aren’t getting sick of our conversations about spanking. It’s been on my mind for some time. Mrs. Lion and I have crossed another boundary. Until early this week, the spankings I received, while painful, had no lasting effect. I’m not being critical of Mrs. Lion. She’s been evolving as a disciplinarian. For some reason, beginning with the series of four spankings I earned by forgetting punishment day, she’s dialed up the intensity and length of my punishments.

Apparently, the intensity was powerful enough to leave me with lasting discomfort. I think that’s important. Enduring a spanking definitely sends a message to me. Finding it uncomfortable to sit for a couple of days sends a much stronger message. It’s impossible for me to forget that I displeased her. When you combine a memorable spanking with three more, repeated once each succeeding day, the degree of discomfort grows.

That’s not surprising. What surprised me was how much I wanted to avoid each succeeding spanking. It’s hard to get in position to receive another spanking when it already hurts a lot just to sit down. Mrs. Lion was unsympathetic. All she said was that I only have x more to go and if I am good, eventually my bottom will stop hurting. How nice of her.

Thursday night we went out to dinner. It was the all-you-can-eat ribs night. I love baby back ribs! So, I ordered them. I should say that this restaurant has wooden chairs with no cushions. It was very uncomfortable to sit at the table. You would think that this discomfort would remind me that I shouldn’t order food that might drip on my shirt. Barbecue sauce has a way of going everywhere when I eat ribs.

Predictably, some sauce dripped on my shirt. I looked sadly at Mrs. Lion and I sighed. She looked at me sympathetically and said that I would only get one spanking for this offense. Thursday night I got the last of the four spankings ironed for forgetting punishment day. Mrs. Lion said it was too bad I had to get another spanking for spilling.

lion's spanked botoom after four days of a spanking a day
Mrs. Lion took this after Thursday’s spanking. It feels much worse than it looks.

Mrs. Lion spanked me as hard as she did on the first night, each night I received a spanking. Every time she hit a sore spot, I yowled loudly. She said nothing and continued as though I was silent. That fourth spanking was incredibly painful. She waited until I became a bit numb and then administered a few very hard swats. Maybe she was feeling sorry for me. It’s those hard swats, I think, that give her spankings their lasting effect.

While I’m really unhappy that it’s so painful to sit down, I am happy that Mrs. Lion has passed the point where I could consider a spanking something I wanted because I like being spanked, and has moved into the area of true discipline. She’s now spanking the way the infamous Disciplinary Wives Club advocated. This website offered women advice on administering real discipline to their husbands.

I confess that I have read that site and found it arousing. It turned me on because it showed women how to effectively control their husbands. I like that concept a lot. Thinking about it is very sexy. I imagined myself being disciplined by a member of that club. In fact, most of what was written there is essentially BDSM porn. However, the suggestions about spanking are accurate.

Now I am truly a disciplined husband. Mrs. Lion spanked me effectively. No, she isn’t being abusive. She is doing exactly what I need. In fact, I’m very sure that she will be adding more very hard swats to my spankings.

Our rather trivial rules are still in effect. Now that the punishment is so effective, perhaps Mrs. Lion will sentence me to less repeated spankings for trivial offenses. One of her current spankings is easily equal to three of the kind she gave prior to this week. That’s just my opinion; hers will probably be different.

Now that the discipline issue is settled, it’s time to talk about the reasons to give those fearful spankings. I’m referring to offenses that cause Mrs. Lion to be angry or hurt. We already have one rule that applies directly to her personal pleasure: She is to receive sex from me, with me initiating at least three times a week. We’ve agreed that those three days are Monday, Thursday, and Saturday. Other days are optional. Mrs. Lion can tell me that she isn’t interested on any of those nights. She’s agreed that she won’t do this unless there is a good reason. Right now, she is experiencing some vaginal pain and has suspended the first of the six nights we set up. The next one is tonight (Saturday). Hopefully, I will initiate successfully. I’m sure the penalty for failing to do this will be considerably more painful than the ones for the trivial offenses.

This isn’t so much about punishment. Though, punishments will be a feature of this at least in the beginning. The idea is that Mrs. Lion will learn to observe and then let me know (with her paddle) that I have done something that upsets her. Her pattern is to internalize these things. Her job is to learn to express her feelings at the time she feels them and to correct me in a way that’s meaningful.

Whether or not you agree with the use of corporal punishment inside our marriage, I hope you understand that we are building something that will give us lasting value. After all, that’s the really important objective.

lion's spanked ass after 3 days of swats
The crack of doom. This is Lion’s butt after his spanking last night.

Lion’s butt is sore. I know this because he tells me practically every time he sits down. It’s even sore when he sits in bed. His office chair, however, is his friend. Obviously, this means I should limit the amount of time he sits in his office chair if I want to be evil.

Last night should have been Lion’s last round of punishment swats. Unfortunately, he spilled some barbecue sauce on his shirt at dinner. At first, I gave him an additional two night sentence. I thought I was being nice. I took pity on his sore buns. Once he used some water to get rid of the stain, I took even more pity on him and reduced the sentence to one extra day.

I figure Lion will waste no time getting himself into trouble for something else. Sooner or later he’ll earn more days of swats. Since I’ve been hitting harder, he doesn’t need multiple days to learn his lesson. That doesn’t mean I won’t continue to impose multiple day punishments. He’ll just learn his lesson extra well.

I suppose I could back off on the trivial rules’ punishment once I start catching him for other things. This is assuming I ever start catching him. I have punished him for interrupting before. I think it depends on how frustrated I am with things in general. If things are going badly, I tend to just shake it off when he annoys me. Add it to the list of crap, I figure. I shouldn’t.

Why should Lion get away with things if traffic makes it twice as long to get somewhere? You’d think I’d hit a limit and Lion would take the brunt of all frustrations. It’s just easier for me to swallow it all. Of course, I don’t really swallow it all. I yell at the idiot driver in front of me who can’t find the gas pedal. I yell at the lights that seem to conspire against me by turning red just as I get to them. But I don’t punish Lion for interrupting me. That’s just wrong.

Lion has a very spankable butt. Now that I’ve finally figured out how to leave a lasting impression, it makes sense to make use of that butt. I’ve learned to spank harder. Maybe I can try harder to punish him.

[Lion — What makes my butt spankable? Is this hereditary?]

This has become a time of major change. For several years we have been working toward perfecting our disciplinary relationship. That may seem odd, but the fact is it’s taken a long time for punishments to rise to the level that they become real deterrents. I imagine that most couples in a Female Led Relationship with Discipline (FLRD) go through a similar learning curve. Mrs. Lion had no experience at all in administering discipline to her partner.

Slowly but surely she has turned up the volume on my spankings. On Monday night she spanked me hard enough for me to feel it for the next two days. On Tuesday, when I got the second of four spankings I am owed, she did that again. I wrote that I thought she could increase her severity even further to make a real impression on me. On Wednesday night she did exactly that.

Wednesday’s spanking was quite different. Mrs. Lion has long understood how to build up intensity so that I’m not overwhelmed when she begins. It’s not that she’s particularly gentle with me, but she helps my body get a chance to get acclimatized to the beating. After that first volley of more gentle swats, she dials up intensity. At that point I am yelping loudly. In the past, this was the stage that concluded my spanking. It hurt a lot and did make a point. I felt that something was missing.

That sounds crazy, I know. But since Mrs. Lion and I have been building this disciplinary relationship in isolation, she’s needed my feedback. My reaction to those spankings was sorrow that I earned them, but no real fear of another one. I had no residual effects an hour after she finished.

From my reading (Julie’s blog), after I passed the next stage, which is more numbness to the spanking, much harder swats can be administered and it’s these that provide the lasting message. On Wednesday night for the first time, Mrs. Lion administered those extra-hard swats at the end of her spanking after I was fairly numb. They had the desired effect. It hurts to sit down, even lie down on the bed on my back. That’s the sign, at least to me, that I’ve been truly spanked. It also makes me dread the Thursday night spanking I am due.

The informal goal Mrs. Lion and I set for punishment was that I would feel the results of a spanking for a day or two after I received it. Also, I would truly hate being spanked as punishment. This is important for us because I’ve always liked the idea of being spanked, and I’ve received many play spankings. Punishment spanking had to be something I wouldn’t like. I don’t like my punishment spankings now.

I’ve had the chance to compare notes with another spanked man and he confirms that we are on the right track with punishment spankings. He suggested that Mrs. Lion continue to increase severity. This isn’t because Mrs. Lion needs to make things worse for me. It’s because it’s rather difficult to send a serious, disciplinary message to a grown man. I’m glad we are working on this. It’s just in time. Mrs. Lion has resolved to make spankable offenses out of things I do that annoy her.

The other significant change is the reinstatement of regular sex for Mrs. Lion. About a week ago she indicated a little interest in receiving oral sex. I pounced on that and gave her a nice orgasm. She reported that she enjoyed it. That doesn’t mean her libido has returned necessarily. It means that she can enjoy sex.

The problem that we’ve had for as long as we’ve been together is that I’m absolutely terrible at initiating sex. Mrs. Lion has learned to initiate sex for me as part of her orgasm control associated with my enforced male chastity. She’s never wanted me to reciprocate. We finally decided that I would initiate sex three times a week (Monday, Thursday, Saturday). How I do it is something we have to work on. I will be punished if I don’t attempt to initiate sex on those days. The exception is if Mrs. Lion is not interested on any given day. She’s agreed to be open as much as she can. Yesterday, she was feeling a little sore and gave me a pass on initiating. I will try again on Saturday.

If this seems artificial, I suppose it is. But for whatever reason, I’ve always had a terrible problem initiating sex. Ironically, I’ve never had a time in my life when I didn’t have a lot of sex. I can’t explain that. I know that one way or another, I’m going to provide Mrs. Lion with lots of fun sex. I think our new plan will do the trick. After all, my butt’s on the line.