It’s been a while since I’ve written a post. I’ve been busy with work and chores and taking care of Lion. He needs eye drops several times a day for now. It’s a good thing I work from home. He’s also been battling with T-Mobile to get a static IP address. (Don’t ask) He’s been on the phone for hours at a time. I’ve been unplugging and plugging in the modem, changing SIM cards, telling him what color the light is, and getting on the phone myself when needed.
The other day he said he had a package coming and it may be interesting. Uh oh. That usually means something else he wants to try. Sometimes it’s new. Sometimes it’s another version of something we already do. This time I opened what looked like a cricket bat. I’ve never actually seen a cricket bat except on TV. Lion said it was a practice bat. Weird. It’s a baseball bat with the “sides” sawn off. Basically, a regular handle with a flat barrel. I wondered how you’d have to hold it to be sure the flat side made contact with the ball. Of course, that wasn’t what Lion was thinking about when he ordered it.
I think I mentioned I wanted to find a batting cage nearby. It’s an excellent way to take out your frustrations. I can hit a baseball as hard as I want, and I won’t hurt it. If I miss, I get more frustrated, and the next one gets hit even harder. Lion wants me to take my frustration out on him. Oh, I don’t think so. I have to be worried about hurting him. Maybe he wants me to get some use out of a funky baseball bat. After his post yesterday, I’m positive he wants me to use some implement on him.
For the record, I’m not a fan of the fact that Lion can get angry during a spanking. I know it means I must be doing something right, but I’m not a fan of anything that makes him angry, especially at me. Yes, I know he’s not really angry at me. I still don’t like it. Does that mean I hold back? No. I tend to forget that he can get angry unless he writes about it, or it actually happens. I tend to go by the timer, or when I think he’s had enough. By the way, my “enough” and his are rarely the same. He’ll tell me it’s enough while I’m hitting him, but he never means it. Afterward, sometimes long afterward, he’ll tell me I didn’t need to stop.
What does my “enough” mean? It could be a particular shade of red on his buns. It could be how often he’s wiggled so far, he has to get back into position. (I used to strap his legs to the bench too, but I haven’t since we got the new way of securing him. I guess I probably should do it again.) It could be blood or the threat of blood. It could be tired arms or haven’t-I-swatted-him-enough-yet?
I’m not sure I’ve ever really gotten to his version of enough, even though I have bruised him a few times. I doubt I ever will. But I think I have it in me to get to his “enough” protests.
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