In her post yesterday, Mrs. Lion posited that most women don’t want to punish their men and correct their behavior. She believes that they do this because the men want it. That is certainly true in her case. There is no question that I want it. After all, domestic discipline, like any power exchange is a consensual activity.
I’ve read an interesting theory on why men want this control and are willing to submit to humiliating and painful punishment. After all, we tend to be bigger and stronger than our mates, yet we meekly submit. The theory suggests that there is a sort of game aspect to domestic discipline and male chastity.
It’s a sexy game that, at least in my case, appeals to me on a very deep, sexual level. I love the idea of being controlled and I get aroused thinking of being punished. The reality turns out not to be sexy at all. But yet I hold on to those thoughts and want to keep playing.
The other side of this isn’t a game at all. It’s a real power exchange that gives Mrs. Lion the ability to help me change undesirable behaviors, like interrupting. It gives her real control over me. She’s said that she doesn’t want this control, but takes it because I want her to do it.
I believe her. She used to say the same thing about enforced chastity. Then, at some point she realized that controlling me sexually was delivering real benefits to our relationship. It stopped being something she does just to please me and turned into something for us both.
The jury is still out on domestic discipline. Mrs. Lion doesn’t like making and enforcing rules. She dislikes punishing me even more. She does it because she knows it’s something I want (need). I wonder if, at some point, she will find value in it for both of us.
If she really believes that women in general dislike being in a dominant position with their men, she will never be able to make the connection. In some sense, she is right. I suspect that many women rationalize their control. Some learn to see humor in spanking and using other childish punishments on their husbands. Their focus is on the humiliating nature of what they do to them and find it funny.
For them, spanking is actually fun. They enjoy the rush of power and the childlike reactions from their men.
I see nothing wrong with that. It actually feeds the male fantasy. Humiliation is definitely part of the equation, at least for me. Mrs. Lion, when lioness 2.0 arrives, will join the ranks of women who like the predicament that their husbands have created for themselves. It’s funny to see that what started as a game has become so much more.
In the meantime, we men meekly get our mouths soaped and our bottoms spanked. It is, after all, what we want.
I agree it is what we want, but we want it from our mate, just like our mate wants something from us from time to time. Maybe it’s already to late in the game for Mrs. Lion to try and teach a new trick to an old dog, if she has been with you this long and accepts all your little quirks and finds your little spills to be what makes you, you, then maybe it is hard for her to want to spank you for punishment even if you asked for it maybe she really doesn’t want your so called bad behaviors to change. But I agree the game is fun and challenging but fun.
That’s a good point. Historically, female-managed domestic discipline has been initiated to correct serious problems like alcohol, cheating, etc. So, the harsh punishment is intended to be a serious deterrent to correct truly unacceptable behavior. Obviously, that isn’t the case with most of us. A closer analogy to what Mrs. Lion and I practice is the Christian male-led domestic discipline. The disciplined wife doesn’t have any major issues. She is corrected to encourage better behavior and obedience. Her rules are similar to mine.
The male disciplining husbands and disciplined wives have been conditioned to believe that domestic discipline is a normal model for living. As you point out, that’s not the case with us. You and I are attracted to the sexy game aspect. The question is whether our wives should also subscribe to this as well. I think that’s where we are now. Evidence for this is Mrs. Lion’s reluctance to punish me for interrupting her. She really hates that I do that, but yet, even though we have domestic discipline in force, I’m not spanked for this offense.
That suggests she is currently unwilling to go past the BDSM game aspect. I think that is the true barrier 2.0 has to cross.