By:
In: Orgasm

I really thought Lion had had more orgasms in January. I guess the month got away from me between his being sick and my being sick or achy. Neither of us was sick last night. I could have spanked him or edged him. If I’d spanked him, it would have been too late to edge him. I think I chose wisely. [Lion — I have had more orgasms in January. When I recorded last night’s, I noticed that I’d had four so far this month. That’s double my average for the last six months.]

Despite it only being three days since his previous orgasm, Lion was ready to roll. I’m sure it helped that I tied his balls up. They looked heart-shaped when I was done. Lion wondered if I should take a picture. I’m not sure it would have come across in a picture, so I declined. His balls bounced as I yanked on him. It took a little while, but I finally got him close. And then, just like that, I stopped. Awww…what did I do that for? It was very close. I thought I’d gone too far at first.

Before I even got him near the edge, I was trying to decide if I wanted to suck him. I didn’t want to lose the ground I’d gained, so I continued with my hand. I wasn’t even sure I was going to give him an orgasm. Then I decided to keep going, both for the sake of the goal and because Lion hasn’t been producing much semen. When I suck him, it’s hard to tell if he hasn’t made much or if I’ve swallowed it already. I wanted to see if he’d produce anything.

Sadly, he didn’t. A few minutes afterward, he said there was a small amount leaking out. Not enough for an appetizer. Humph. I love his cream filling. Where is my cream filling? I need to figure out what vitamin or food creates semen. I hope it’s not raisins. Lion hates them. I keep threatening to make him eat some. Wouldn’t it be horrible if it really is raisins that produce semen? I wonder if he’d eat them. He’s worried about the lack of semen too. Somehow, I don’t think he’s that worried.

By:
In: Mrs Lion Comments

I know I’m not always clear when I explain things. Other times, I’m very sure I’m being clear. A few minutes ago, I was explaining to Lion that my office is closed so we can be trained on the new computer system. It seems ridiculous to be closed Wednesday morning and Thursday all day, only to be open again on Friday as if we’ll learn it that quickly. I also mentioned that we’re closed Saturday because we were supposed to have first aid and CPR training but the instructor has COVID so that was cancelled. I went on to say that I found out we can do first aid and CPR training online, but if we want Red Cross certification we’d have to take it in person. Lion wondered why the Red Cross would be certifying our computer training. Um. No.

This isn’t the first time, nor will it be the last, that he hasn’t listened to my entire statement and then gotten confused. I confess. I do it to him too, but I usually realize I’ve done it and ask him to repeat a certain part. Maybe I’ve heard the first part and some of the second part, but when I’m processing the information, it doesn’t quite make sense. From my point of view, hearing some of the second part but needing clarification is better than wondering why the Red Cross would be certifying our computer training. Of course, I’m biased. I think I’m right and Lion is wrong. He probably thinks he’s right and I’m wrong.

The funny thing is, he had a boss, many years ago, who would read the first part of an email and then ask a bunch of questions that could have been answered if he’d just read further along in the email. Lion does a similar thing. I’ll ask three questions and he’ll answer two. What about the third? Even if I ask in a subsequent email, he won’t answer that damn third question. It’s frustrating. For a while, I’d ask one question per email and that seemed to go better. Now, we can just yell at each other through the wall rather than sending emails. I’d like to say it completely solves the problem, but it doesn’t.

I know I could probably make a rule about listening or answering questions, but these things are subjective. He’ll say he listened. I’ll say he didn’t. I’ll say I listened. He’ll say I didn’t. (I listen more often than he thinks I do.) If it really frustrates me, I can always punish him for pissing me off. That’s a great blanket rule. Why did you leave the kitchen light on and make me get up to turn it off? You pissed me off. Whack! Why did you lose the dog’s toy in the hamper again and make me get up to find it? You pissed me off. Whack! I sound like a bitch, don’t I? In reality, I don’t whack Lion as often as he’d like me to, and certainly not as often as I should. It actually takes quite a bit to piss me off, unless I’m already stressed out by work and life in general. I have my moments of complete frustration with everything and Lion may just happen to breathe a little too loudly. Thankfully, that doesn’t happen often. As a matter of fact, I think it’s happened far less often now that I’m working from home. Unless you count dinner time. What’s for dinner is still the most annoying question ever.

[Lion — My current confusion was caused by the fact that Mrs. Lion’s office sent an email to all patients (I’m a patient) that the office would be closed for new computer system training. I didn’t realize that first aid training was also involved.]

By:
In: Mrs Lion Comments

This morning, I made an unusual commute to work. We had a meeting for the whole team. These meetings are rarely for the whole team. It usually highlights something this department did or what the other department is about to do. This time, however, it was, at least in part, about the new software we are about to use. That doesn’t mean it wasn’t as boring as the other meetings. Afterward, I had a training session during which I found out just how distasteful my job will become once we transition. At first, nothing much will change for me. Then I’ll be working out of both the old and the new system. Blech! I’m not looking forward to that.

I picked up lunch on the way home and we spent a little while together. We haven’t been apart for that long in ages. I normally run out to pick up prescriptions or do other shopping and I’m home in an hour or so. This was over five hours. I’m now back at my home office desk and I’m realizing how tired I am. I didn’t sleep well. I knew I had to be up a little earlier than usual and that throws me off. Lion said I was snoring loudly, so he didn’t get much sleep.

On the way home, I was trying to decide what I should do with Lion tonight. He may not be horny yet, but that doesn’t mean he won’t enjoy something. I mean, he won’t like IcyHot. He never likes that. But he does love to have his balls tied up. That’s something that he’d like whether or not he was in the mood for anything else. I’ll know pretty much right away if he’s enjoying himself. We can proceed from there.

Of course, it’s always possible we’ll be too tired to do much of anything. I know I will be unless I get my second wind.

By:
In: Rules, Orgasm

Lion wondered what his new rule was that I outlined yesterday. When I thought about it some more, I realized it’s just part of the don’t-piss-me-off rule. If he thinks his work is more important than mine, it pisses me off.

Don’t do that, Lion.

I did think of a real new rule just a few minutes ago. Since Lion doesn’t usually wear a shirt, he doesn’t usually spill anything on himself anymore. I never said he couldn’t spill on his chest or face. On the other hand, it’s not okay to spill things on the bed either. Last week, I had just changed the bed, and we were eating dinner, and Lion spilled food on the comforter. I just changed it. Do you know how frustrating that is?

Changing the bed is one of my most hated, he-can’t-help-me-with-it chores. I do not want to do it twice in one day. I don’t even want to do it weekly. (I’m a slob.) I can’t tell you how long I’d wait to change the bed if it was up to me. You’d probably barf. You’re probably barfing now, knowing I don’t want to do it weekly. How often are you supposed to change a bed? Yeah. No. I wouldn’t. Lion is the only reason I change it as often as I do. So why would his spilling food onto the bed become a rule? It’s because he’ll be after me to change it again, possibly sooner than I want to, which we already established is not often.

If he can clean up his act (literally) by not spilling on his shirt, maybe he can do it with the bed. There’s his first new rule in a long time that really makes sense. Of course, I suppose even this could fall under the don’t-piss-me-off rule, but then most things could. What’s for dinner? Don’t piss me off. Can you get the mail? Don’t piss me off. I’m not that bad. Well, I’m not quite that bad.

You’ll be happy to know that the poor, hen-pecked Lion got an orgasm last night. It was the first time we felt well enough to do anything sexual. I edged him a few times first. I had to. I couldn’t just let him think he would have an orgasm on the first try. That’s no fun. Plus, it builds suspense. I’d like to say it builds semen, but he hasn’t produced much lately. I think he’s out of practice. No problem. I’ll make sure he gets more.