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In: Edging, Anal play, Mrs Lion Comments, Oral Sex

We’ve been writing a lot lately about anal play and punishment. You may think we’ve strayed from enforced chastity. While Lion may not be caged, I am still his only source of orgasm. I decide when he gets played with and when he has an orgasm. Well, that’s not technically true. When he’s in a slump, I may want him to have an orgasm but he’s unable to get there.

Recently, I’ve changed things up a bit. I’ve been giving him oral sex, but rather than give myself an achy neck or sore jaw, I only do it until I want to stop. Did Lion make it to the edge? Did he have an orgasm? No? Awwww. Too bad. Maybe next time. Or maybe not.

I think it’s been about a week since I made this change. I’ve wanted Lion to have an orgasm a few times. He’s wanted an orgasm every time, I’m sure. I’d guess about 90% of the time he never makes it anywhere near the edge. I know it feels good. He’s told me and I can hear the moaning. Maybe 2% of the time he’s at the edge when I stop and the rest of the time he’s pretty close.

I don’t think Lion would argue with this new technique. It certainly gets him more oral sex which he loves. He may not be getting to the edge as often as before but he is enjoying the journey.

Last night we finally solved the issue of my legs hitting the footboard of the bed. I had Lion lay diagonally across the bed. As a result, he enjoyed a much longer session. See what happens when the Lioness is comfortable? He still didn’t make it to the edge, but we had fun.

Lion attributed last night’s “failure” to the fact that his ass hurt. I’d done quite a bit more anal play than I have in the past. Both the length of time and the movement increased. I still only got four fingers in but I moved them around a lot more. I even shoved them in sideways. If I’m going to open him up, I need to be bit more aggressive than I have been. That’s not to say I was violent. I just stretched him a little more than I have in the past. I was still conscious of his discomfort level and I never went past it.

He also spent some time standing in the punishment corner. He forgot to set up the coffee the other day. Last night, he remembered the coffee but forgot punishment day. That damn Saturday punishment day got him again! That’s normally a funishment, but he’s been forgetting so often that it’s now a punishment. I’m hoping eventually a sore bottom will help him remember.

Tonight maybe I’ll take it a little easier on his ass so he can make it to the edge. I sure would love a Lion orgasm.

By:
In: Anal play, Female led relationship with discipline, Lion's Journal, Male Chastity

Christmas is always a very emotional time for most people. Mrs. Lion and I like the idea of celebrating it. We like the decorations, the music (for short while anyway), and of course the food. Around Thanksgiving and Christmas the local supermarkets stock up on turkey breasts. It’s difficult to find one the rest of the year. So we bought three and put them in the freezer. We ate one yesterday. It was a nice dinner. Mrs. Lion invited one of her friends who was going to be alone, and the three of us enjoyed a quiet celebration.

Holidays aren’t a big deal for us. Our kids are grown and live far away. I’m an only child and Mrs. Lion’s sister is on the East Coast. As for us, we celebrate every day. I don’t mean that in some sappy way. As you might gather from our posts, every day is special. Mrs. Lion works hard to make me happy and I try to do the same for her. We got our Christmas gifts some time ago. Neither of us is very good at withholding something from the other. That’s not entirely true. Mrs. Lion is absolutely wonderful at withholding orgasms from me.

mrs. lion jerking lion off

Over the years, I’ve come to enjoy the suspense of being aroused, teased, and then having to wait and see whether or not Mrs. Lion will let me ejaculate. I know that some guys prefer to be horny rather than to be satisfied. I am not in that club. But I’m definitely in the vagina-is-in-charge sex-play club. I really like when Mrs. Lion teases me. I also like it when she mentions that she’s going to tease me.

While Christmas and other holidays aren’t actually different from our regular day-to-day life, they are still big fun because we get to be home together. Since we both like to do nice things for one another, sometimes the pleasure can become a little routine. As I’ve mentioned before, sex and play seem to always be the last activities of our day. I wonder what it would be like if on a day we are home together, Mrs. Lion would take a break and lead me into the bedroom for some activities. I would love that! [Mrs. Lion — Before I moved in with Lion, we usually played in the afternoon.]

We took a break from anal on Christmas Eve. Mrs. Lion was worn out and achy from working around the house. I don’t think we need to do this daily. We also talked a little bit about cleanout. Insertion play is more fun for both of us (for obviously different reasons) if everything is free of matter inside my body. We use 7 ounce Fleet enemas for this purpose. They were the largest capacity disposables I could find.

The smaller disposables are designed to help people who are constipated. Anal, pegging, and other rear-end activities for either sex need more cleanout than stimulation for a bowel movement. Many people use enema bags which hold about a quart of water. These are a good idea but require preparation and quite a bit of time to expel all the water. Mrs. Lion doesn’t like that. She prefers something quick and easy. Fleet has been selling 7-ounce disposables on Amazon. This is enough liquid to provide a cleanout for our anal play. [Mrs. Lion – I only remember using the enema bag once and I don’t remember a strong preference one way or the other.]

Aren’t you glad you’re reading this post?

I bring this up because it’s a subject that is often overlooked. Anal is exciting and fun for both partners. The problem isn’t so much that you might encounter poop when doing penetration. It’s that being penetrated when you do have the material in the way, causes an uncomfortable feeling. Getting cleaned out vastly improves the enjoyment of being anally penetrated. It also makes it more pleasant for your partner.

I like it when Mrs. Lion engages in anal activities with me. Not only is it exciting that she does, but it is also another way she can show her sexual control. It’s a very intimate activity that we share. I think that makes it particularly special for both of us. She doesn’t have any particular fascination with my asshole. I don’t have a lifelong craving to be anally fucked. Let’s face it, it’s uncomfortable to learn to relax and allow insertion of whatever Mrs. Lion chooses.

The fact that she is choosing and I am willingly accepting is very exciting to me. No, it doesn’t make me hard. It’s a different kind of arousal. She sees evidence of it later when she plays with my penis. A side benefit of this anal fun is that it stimulates my prostate, which in turn helps generate more semen. On occasions when she allows me to have an orgasm, she considers that extra cream her reward. On other occasions, the prostate stimulation seems to generate precum. She really likes that.

I tend to be a goal-oriented guy. Mrs. Lion is much less focused on results. Years ago, long before we considered male chastity or a Female Led Relationship with Discipline, we did do BDSM play. When she strapped me into the sling, she liked to do anal play. When she first started, she would use her fingers. She said she wanted to be able to get her whole hand inside me. Each time we played that way she would try. While I was able to take larger and larger dildos, I seemed to be stuck on three lioness fingers.

full hand inserted in anus
Mrs. Lion is very close to achieving this. Our new training technique really makes this possible for the first time.

Now that we have decided to take a more focused approach, Mrs. Lion doesn’t stop just because I make some uncomfortable sounding noises. Just as she has learned to ignore my yelps when she spanks me, she ignores the sounds I make when she is penetrating me. Instead, she gauges her progress on how much resistance she feels. She’s learned to use just enough additional pressure to make me relax. When I reach a point when I don’t seem to be able to open wider, she usually either backs off or stops.

This technique has been very successful so far. A few days ago she was able to get four fingers all the way up to her knuckles as well as some of her thumb into me without too much discomfort. She’s learned to begin by letting me get accustomed to the feeling of something inside me by pegging me with the large, training butt plug.

It’s amazing how switching from using dildos to help me relax to using butt plugs has made all the difference in the world. When I think about it, it makes sense. All the dildos do is teach me to relax enough to accept them and then since they are inside, I can close down against them. I don’t learn to be able to relax once they are removed.

large butt plug

Being able to stay open without pressure is critical for fisting. The butt plug, on the other hand, is pyramid-shaped so that I am forced to learn to accept an increasingly larger object and then it suddenly turns into a narrow object when I reach the shoulders of the plug. Then when Mrs. Lion pulls it out I’m forced to open suddenly to the full with and then feel it shrink smaller and smaller as she withdraws it.

Then she inserts it again, essentially pegging me with it. I’m forced to open for the increased width and then feel the pressure to expand suddenly disappear. If I don’t learn to relax and stay relaxed even when the pressure to expand has stopped, it will be uncomfortable when it has to suddenly expand again as the plug is pulled out. Using the plug teaches me to stay open and relaxed.

I watched some porno videos of male anal fisting. I noticed that when the woman withdrew her hand, his anus remained wide open. He had learned to relax and stay relaxed. This made the insertion of her hand or another large object easy and comfortable for him.

Some people think that by learning this relaxation, or as some think, stretching, the anus loses its ability to close tightly. This is untrue. I know several people who have been fisted regularly for many years. They don’t have any problem with incontinence.

I like that Mrs. Lion is teaching me this. Being able to accept her hand is a very intimate thing to do. Male chastity is a negative form of control. By that, I don’t mean it’s bad or wrong. It’s negative because it’s the removal of something: the orgasm, that demonstrates control. Being prevented from pleasure is a way of demonstrating power. Theoretically, the male has no choice but to accept this.

Anal penetration is a positive form of control. It requires cooperation. That doesn’t mean it’s voluntary. Whatever Mrs. Lion chooses to shove up my ass is going to go there whether I want it to or not. However, I have a strong incentive to cooperate. In fact, I will cooperate whether I want to or not. My body will become trained to relax as a way of reducing discomfort. It’s a form of conditioning that will turn something uncomfortable into something very pleasant over time.

This is very similar to my experience with enforced male chastity. In the beginning, while I found it exciting that I was wearing a chastity device, I was also frustrated and annoyed that I kept being teased and not allowed to ejaculate. This was what I wanted to do. But at the same time, I really wanted to come.

That’s the way anal play is going to turn out too

By:
In: Anal play, Mrs Lion Comments, Oral Sex, Punishment

[Mrs. Lion- This post was originally scheduled for yesterday. Merry Christmas everyone!!!]

Last night Lion spilled food on his shirt. It wasn’t a bad spill but a spill nonetheless. He needed a funishment. I decided to soap his mouth. Unfortunately, I then went to do something that should have been simple that took far longer than it should have and I lost track of time. When I finally removed the soap it had been fifteen minutes. That’s far too long. Lion said he started to feel burning. I should have set a timer. Luckily, there was only minimal damage.

Since this was a funishment, I didn’t feel any need to delay play. I pulled out a butt plug, the lube and a glove. I had Lion kneel on the bed and I started off with two fingers. I’m trying to ease into things each time. His butt may eventually remember to relax, but for now it needs time to adjust. I used the largest training butt plug and then went back to three fingers, and then four. Between wiggling my fingers inside him and moving them in and out, I was able to get four fingers up to my knuckles and I even got my thumb in for a bit.

In order to do this more effectively, I need to give Lion an enema beforehand. I don’t find it particularly disgusting to encounter poop, but it will definitely be more comfortable for Lion. However, if he wants me to use an ungloved hand, he will need to be cleaned out. I’m good with the glove so far. I think it slides more easily.

Lion thought I stopped too soon. He said he was able to go on longer. I didn’t stop because I thought he was done. I stopped because I was done. I don’t know how long we were at it, but it felt like long enough to me. We’ll try again tonight.

[Lion — It wasn’t that I wanted to push Mrs. Lion, I just wanted to let her know that I was still up for more. She is really doing a great job training me. We never got this far in the past.]

I also decided to continue the oral experiment. I was torn between that and using the finger vibrator. Ultimately, I decided that Lion loves oral and I’m kind of partial to it too. I’m pretty sure Lion was happy with my decision. He was making some nice noises. I thought maybe he’d make it to the edge, but he didn’t quite. No problem. We’ll try that again tonight too.

Lion made the comment that I’d given both ends of him attention. Yessiree! His tail end will get more tonight and, if necessary, his top half will too.

By:
In: Lioness 4.0, Anal play, Female led relationship with discipline, Lion's Journal

Merry Christmas! Santa Lion was good to me this year. While Mrs. Lion and I didn’t have a tree this Christmas — no kids around and too much unpacking to do — it didn’t stop us from enjoying the holiday spirit. On Monday night we had leftover Chinese takeout. When we get Chinese food, we always get a little more than we need plus an extra container of wonton soup.

It was a little chilly in the kitchen, so I had a T-shirt on. Big mistake! As you know, I’m not the neatest eater. It didn’t take me long to splash some soup on my shirt. To my dismay, a stain appeared. Mrs. Lion gave me that special look that means she noticed and I’m in trouble.

Sure enough, after dinner, Mrs. Lion invited me into the bathroom. She had thoroughly lathered up her hands. She told me open my mouth and soaped the inside of it very thoroughly. Then she inserted a bar of soap (one of her stubs) and told me to bite. I did.

It felt like hours as I stood over the sink, white foam dripping from my chin. Fortunately, the Dove hypoallergenic soap is almost tasteless. So it wasn’t very bad having a mouth full of it. The only problem came after it had been in my mouth for a while. It started to burn.

We’ve had this problem before with keeping soap in my mouth too long. Soap, even gentle soap, is alkaline and can burn the delicate lining of the mouth if left inside too long. We’ve learned that 10 minutes is a safe-but-effective length of time to savor soapy flavor. I think it might be a good idea for Mrs. Lion to select a more flavored soap. I suppose it would be safe to go back to the dreaded Ivory Soap so long as my duration is kept to 10 minutes or less. I’m famous for offering suggestions that make things worse for me. I don’t know why I keep doing it.

Anyway, Monday night had a full program of lion fun. Following the not-so-pleasant mouth soaping, we went directly to a session of anal training. I can’t tell what Mrs. Lion is doing back there. I can only tell that it feels full and hurts a little. She’s gotten very good at keeping the pain level low while expanding my horizons, so to speak. She told me that she got four fingers in all the way to her knuckles as well as some of her thumb. This is much more than I have taken before.

In all things Lion, it’s clear that the trick is consistency and persistence. When Mrs. Lion tells me to get on my knees for anal training, I’ve learned that she will use me until I reach a point that satisfies her for the session. It’s not about what I want anymore. I may have suggested doing this, but that’s the end of my involvement. After that, my role is to get in position and docilely accept whatever Mrs. Lion wishes to do.

My role as the docile recipient extends to pleasure too. Since I began having trouble getting to the edge, Mrs. Lion has decided that sexual stimulation no longer includes automatic edging. Now, like her anal activities, she stimulates my penis until she decides she’s done. If it means that I get an orgasm, that’s fine with her. If it means that I just get very aroused and frustrated, that’s even better. The point is that while these activities are for my benefit, they are completely at Mrs. Lion’s pleasure. I no longer have a vote in how long or how much I get. I should just consider myself lucky that I get attention at all.

The best gift this year, and every other year for almost 2 decades, is Mrs. Lion’s love. This past year has been the most difficult in my life. Thanks to my spinal surgery and glaucoma coming together, I’ve lost considerable ability to do things I’ve taken for granted all my life. Mrs. Lion has taken wonderful care of me. She’s had to shoulder substantially more work than she normally does. She has done it without complaint. She’s done everything necessary to keep me healthy and happy.

She’s also learned how to effectively deal with me as my disciplining wife. Her increasing assumption of control, especially in terms of the things she does for me, is teaching me how to be more docile. I’ve learned that I can provide input, but it’s largely ignored when things are happening. This is a wonderful gift. It’s exactly what I need, even if it isn’t what I like at the time.

You’d think that activities like anal training would be just fun BDSM. It’s much more than that for me. Aside from being something that I like, it’s also a way of teaching me to submit. Now that Mrs. Lion has assumed full control, the time I spend simply accepting what she wants to give is very satisfying.

I think it’s important to get past labels. I am not just “a submissive”. I don’t think there is any such thing anyway. It’s far more complicated than that. I’m feeling great emotional satisfaction in surrendering. It didn’t feel like real surrender when I could call the shots. Yes, Mrs. Lion could withhold orgasms as long as she wished, but I did set the ground rules. I expected to be edged every time she played with my penis. Similarly, I expected anal training to end when it got a bit uncomfortable. I expected to be able to tell her I wasn’t in the mood to do it on a given day and she would put away the toys.

She believed that since the play was for my benefit, I should be able to decide whether or not we did it at any given time. I should also be able to decide when I’ve had enough. I think she finally understands that that isn’t the point. I may say I want anal training and she may agree to do it. My hope was that once she agreed, everything else was completely out of my hands.

Now, she gets out her gloves, lube, and toys; then tells me to get on my knees. She no longer gives me an opportunity to tell her I’m not in the mood. It’s not about my mood, it’s about the availability of my butt for training. This is exactly the way I hoped things would go. I think this is the beginning of lioness 4.0. What a wonderful Christmas gift!