Female led relationship with discipline

We are starting to feel the effects of the COVID-19 pandemic. Mrs. Lion was laid off from her job for at least a month. Friday was her last day. This makes a dent in our income, of course. It’s much more difficult for some of her colleagues. Some are single parents who were barely staying above water while they were working full-time. Mrs. Lion and her associates chipped in for a food delivery to one of them. It was a single mother who commented that she was completely out of food. It’s hard to imagine how difficult life will be for these hard-working people.

My retirement savings are shrinking. As of Friday, they went below the amount I contributed. I did shift most of my investments to money market and bonds when the epidemic began. However, about 1/4 of my 401(k) is invested in my company’s stock. It’s lost almost 40% of its value. I’m very tempted to move some of my money into the stock while it’s in this depressed situation. The company is fine in terms of its long-term prospects.

One thing that Mrs. Lion and I understand very well is that as long as the basis of our relationship is solid, we will find a way through adversity. We’ve been through hard times before. They tend to bring us closer. We’ve both made bad decisions over the years, but don’t see any reason to blame one another for them. We do the best we can. More importantly, we both know that.

I will be very happy to have the extra time with my lioness. We do very well together. I fully expect that once she gets her sea legs, I may get some extra painful attention because she is here full-time. On Friday night, she made wonderful coconut shrimp. We subscribe to Hello Fresh. The meals we get are absolutely restaurant-quality. Both of us find them easy enough to prepare

The coconut shrimp had a delicious apricot sauce for dipping. I didn’t realize that Mrs. Lion had put together two little dishes of that sauce. I made sure that the dish of sauce I was using was an easy reach for her. As a result, I managed to drip some of the sticky apricot sauce on my shirt. I asked Mrs. Lion if I would be punished. She said that I wouldn’t because I was trying to make sure she had some sauce as well

Is this Mrs. Lion reverting to a former, kinder self? Only time will tell. I’m not in favor of that change. I do much better when she is consistent, even if it means sometimes I am spanked for something unfairly. Spare the paddle spoil the lion. I know myself and us well enough to recognize the risk we take when consistency drops, even a little. An extra spanking is preferable to loss of disciplinary momentum.

In the past, when Mrs. Lion has been home for extended periods of time, both discipline and sexual activity seem to drop off. I’m not sure why this happens. I suspect it’s because when routine is broken, either new habits are formed or inertia sets in. I’m concerned about inertia.

We may have to figure out new routines that are independent of work schedules. I may need to be more proactive in terms of reminding her to do sexual things as well as discipline me. This isn’t optimal, but at least in the beginning it may be necessary. Also, maybe we need to continue our email exchanges even though she’s only a few feet from me. Some things are much easier to write than they are to say. I am confident that one way or another we will work this out.

We are at the beginning of difficult times. Mrs. Lion’s office is closing until at least the end of April. She learned this last night on the phone. Yesterday was her last day at the office. So far, my company is keeping us all on, and we are working from home. It will be good to have Mrs. Lion home. Even though she hasn’t even started being home, she’s expressed some concern about having alone time. I don’t see that as a problem since I have my own office here in the house, and I spend most of the day inside of it.

We will be maintaining our Female Led Relationship with Discipline (FLRD). We’ve been doing this so long that it is very difficult to suspend even if we wanted to. Being in close contact all the time will most certainly result in a combination of more sexual activity and more punishments for me. At least, that’s what I imagine. If Mrs. Lion reverts back to an earlier version of herself and withdraws, they’ll be less of everything. I don’t think that will happen.

It’s been more than two weeks since I’ve worn any clothing below the waist. I wear a T-shirt every day so that I appear decent during videoconferences for work. Also, it keeps me warm. I don’t think I’ve ever gone this long without wearing pants of any sort. I suppose I should just get used to it because it looks like I will be housebound for months.

On Thursday night, Mrs. Lion told me to lie on my back across the bed. This is our new position in blow jobs. Mrs. Lion crawled between my legs and went to work. She brought me very close to ejaculating several times. When she was done, she got up and said, “did I make you horny?”

“Are you kidding?” I said. I was lying on my back with my penis sticking straight up in the air like the Leaning Tower of Lion. She may not have left a lasting impression on my bottom when she spanked me the other day, but my penis is another story. She got my motor running. I still get little tingles when I think about Thursday night.

We may be late to the party, but Mrs. Lion and I are discovering the joys of streaming video. We subscribe to Netflix, Amazon Prime, Hulu, and Disney+. I’ve been amazed at how much programming is available to us on demand. On Thursday night, we watched “Mary Poppins.” It was exactly the right choice, given that Mrs. Lion had just learned she was being laid off.

Speaking of interesting videos, an amazing group of musicians performed “The Weight”. Each musician and singer was in a different location. Thanks to digital technology, they could all play together. Check it out.

This brought tears to my eyes.

Mrs. Lion and I are determined to continue posting every day. As long as we stay healthy, I’m sure we will have continuing adventures. I know that several other bloggers read our posts. I’m asking you to take whatever extra time you have to write more frequently. Our blogs are an important way people can maintain normal life even if they can’t leave the house.

As usual, Mrs. Lion was right. On Sunday night she got out her trusty CBT rope and wound turn after turn around my balls stretching them far from my body. When she finished she left them that way and commented that she liked bouncy balls. A very short time later she started playing with my penis. It didn’t take long before I was rock hard and trying to help her with my hips. She edged me over and over. When she was done she kissed the tip of my penis and commented that I produced some precum.

All I needed was a little extra attention to get back to being her eager lion. If you read her post yesterday afternoon, you know that she sent me an email and asked me what I might enjoy doing on Monday (I’m writing this on Monday before anything gets started). I said it might be fun to try milking. So, she wrote her post “The Lion Says Moo“. In an email, she wondered if I would be able to stay on all fours long enough to be milked to the edge a few times. Good point. I’ll try.

I also mentioned that it might take some practice over several sessions for both of us to get into good shape for lion milking. Mrs. Lion expressed some doubt that she would be able to keep up her interest. She was underlining a point that is both an amazingly strong credit for her an ongoing problem for the two of us: There is nothing in all this for her. She isn’t interested in sex for herself and she isn’t particularly amused by the antics she puts me through. She really hasn’t found anything to motivate her beyond her strong desire to make me happy.

So far, we haven’t come up with anything that she is strongly motivated to do on her own. If it wasn’t for her strong love for me, I think she would’ve given up all the stuff years ago. I keep hoping that we will come up with activities for me that challenge her and make her want to keep going out of her own desire to perfect something.

Spanking may be one of those things. She does seem motivated to perfect her ability to effectively spank me. I’m not kidding myself. She would stop in a minute if she didn’t think I needed or wanted it. It’s not that she’s unusual. When I was topping I found it very difficult to look for constructive motivation to perfect my technique. I chalked it off to the fact that I was probably not really a top. I was right. Clearly, I’m not.

Mrs. Lion isn’t either. She’s very good in her role as my disciplining wife. It’s a role I asked her to play, not one she decided for herself. More often then not I think this is the case with most couples. When you come down to it, even though being under her discipline and orgasm control is important to me, it’s not a very big part of the reason I’m with her. People who get together because of an interest in BDSM, chastity, etc. don’t generally last too long. Let’s face it, even though I want Mrs. Lion to have a wonderful time in her role, she probably never will. What keeps her with me has nothing to do with that. We love each other and want to be together under any condition. That’s the real glue.

Still, I wish she would have more fun being my disciplining wife. Oh well.

Sometimes I’m not too bright. For example, on Saturday morning I remembered it was punishment day. Mrs. Lion wasn’t in the room at the time so I figured I would wait and tell her when I saw her. I didn’t. It completely slipped my mind. You’d think I would remember because I know very well what happens when I forget.

When I did remember, it crossed my mind not to tell her because I sort of wanted a spanking. I quickly decided that was not a good thing to do because it felt dishonest. Maybe my unconscious mind made me forget. My very conscious bottom pays the price. You might also argue that Mrs. Lion planned to spank me anyway. She wants more practice working in the “crack”. That idea sort of excites me too. I would much rather receive a maintenance or practice spanking than a punishment one.

Yesterday morning I was thinking about how I would react to our blog if I had never considered a Female Led Relationship with Discipline or, for that matter, enforced male chastity. Both concepts are pretty strange. Then I started thinking about why I would consider them strange. Then it came to me.

The obvious reason is that I am subjecting myself to a loss of pleasure (orgasms) and painful punishments. This is happening in the context of marriage, an institution where two equals are bound together for life. Wait a minute! Two equals?

If you go by the situation comedies that were on television when I was a kid, husbands were the nominal heads of the household. However, the real intelligence and authority came from the wives. Husbands, think Ricky Ricardo, were constantly outsmarted by their cute “little” wives.

My parents seem to have no clear idea of who was in charge. When it suited her, my mother would tell me that my father would speak to me when I did something wrong. Neither of them ever spanked me. Otherwise, she seemed to do exactly what she pleased regardless of what my father thought about her activities or spending. Apparently, (I don’t remember this but the housekeepers who raised me told me) my parents would have long, loud fights. These fights had no resolution other than my father going off and drinking.

There was no real structure. My mom worked and had her own money. My father worked more and paid most of the bills. Absent was any real affection between them. They were horrible role models for my future.

This lack of tradition left me free to decide for myself what might work in my life. My first wife was, for want of a better word, submissive. She let me make any decision I cared for. I think a better explanation is that she left me to deal with the things that mattered. She was free to pursue her career and, after we had kids, become a doting mother.

We had a good sex life. It was absolutely vanilla; well we did have anal sex once in a while. There was no kink. I wanted to be spanked and once I asked her if she would. In a flat, unemotional way, she said, “No.” That was that. I guess it was this event that made me realize there was a lot more wrong with our marriage that I wanted to admit.

Mrs. Lion, as you know, has no problem spanking me. She did in the beginning but overcame that hurdle. I suppose that is strange. What can I tell you? Much, more importantly, is the dynamic we share.

In no way is Mrs. Lion a femdom. She’s an easy-going, wonderfully sweet woman. I never really wanted a classic dominant woman. My submissive desires are pretty limited. I like that she controls if and when I will get an orgasm and I like that she spanks me. I really don’t think that’s a big deal. Some people may consider it odd, but it’s harmless.

The much more significant change is the way the power dynamic evolves in our relationship. We are partners and we do pretty much everything together. From the beginning, she has deferred to me. This isn’t a problem for me, but I think that it could ultimately hurt our relationship.

Now we’re getting to what many people will believe is strange. In fact, I think that most of the people who enjoy male chastity will find this next part really odd. Instead of the BDSM, femdom sort of female authority (something I really don’t like), we are evolving into a true female-led marriage. It’s nothing like most people think about when they hear this expression. In fact, is very close to the way real lions relate to one another.

The females defer to the male almost all of the time. They let him eat first and have his way with the pride, up to a point. When he does something one of them doesn’t like, he gets a very painful bite on the rear end as a reminder that his authority only extends as far as the lionesses allow.

It’s the same dynamic we have in our marriage. Mrs. Lion is happy to go along with what I want until she isn’t. Then I learn of her displeasure via a painful punishment spanking.

Developing this dynamic hasn’t been easy for her. She has a strong sense of fairness. She doesn’t like the idea that she should punish me for something I didn’t know was wrong. This concept comes from raising children. It’s unfair to punish children if they don’t know they’ve done something they shouldn’t. I’ve argued it isn’t the same with adults. Adults should know better.

In vanilla marriages, dissatisfaction with the behavior of one mate may seem to be overlooked. Sooner or later as things accumulate, destructive behaviors emerge that can destroy the marriage. I felt this was particularly dangerous in Mrs. Lion and my marriage. Even though we both work hard to make each other happy, I’ve done things that upset her. Her typical reaction was to ignore my transgression and move on. Eventually, her anger would build up and she would give me the silent treatment. That’s particularly difficult for me to handle. I have a strong fear of rejection.

The solution is the FLRD we have now. The idea is that if I do something that displeases her, I get punished. Mrs. Lion prefers to spank me for punishment. She’s learning that it doesn’t matter if I have a rule for the behavior she doesn’t like or not. All that matters is that I’ve done something that displeases her. My punishment is an expression of her displeasure. Simple, right?

Yes, I have explicit rules I have to follow. More importantly, I will learn when Mrs. Lion is displeased with my behavior. She may growl at me. In fact, until very recently, that was all she would do. Now, she will growl and then at her earliest convenience, punish me.

I like this change. I don’t like the discomfort of the spanking. I really like that she lets me know in no uncertain terms when I’ve done something she doesn’t like. Since I don’t like having a sore bottom, I should quickly learn how to avoid repeating that behavior. Even if I do like a sore bottom, eventually enough is enough. One way or another, she gets to let me know and I learn to avoid repeating the error.

It’s not complicated. There are no BDSM rituals; just my bare bottom and her paddle. It’s always the same. Sometimes, the spanking will be longer and more severe. Generally, Mrs. Lion reserves those extra unpleasant sessions to things that she particularly dislikes or for things I can’t seem to learn. Forgetting Saturday punishment day appears to be one of those. Eventually, I will learn.

I don’t think it’s particularly strange or crazy. It represents a treaty between us. It’s an agreement that allows us to resolve the sort of emotionally loaded issues that hurt other relationships. It’s not dangerous. It almost certainly isn’t your cup of tea. It’s ours. I hope you understand.