By:
In: Female led relationship with discipline, Living with a female led relationship, Rules

Last Saturday we slept late. This Saturday Lion slept late. I was up earlier to let the dog out. I’m still very tired. I’m back to not sleeping well. I’m not sure I ever really reached a point of sleeping well, but some nights are better than others. There’s a lot to do around here but I’m not very motivated to do it. I’ll probably wind up taking a nap and then maybe I’ll feel better.

I did not follow Lion’s suggestion of doing the Box O’Fun items he picked on Thursday night. It may be a cop out, but if I decide he shouldn’t have been spanked or we wanted to put off the pegging for another time, then we should do it that way. I’m in charge. What I say goes. Right?

Of course, I can see the argument against it. We have the Box O’Fun to prevent inertia. If I bring it out then we should follow what it says. Maybe it’s because I’ve been so tired. I just didn’t have it in me to do any pegging. It did cross my mind that I could shove a butt plug in and be done with it, but a butt plug isn’t pegging. On the other hand, I’m not sure Lion could have handled going straight for pegging. Perhaps a butt plug would have been the best idea.

As you can see, none of this is written in stone. Lion thinks he’s getting off easy on nights that I agree to delay punishment or play. I don’t see it that way. Most of the time I think I’m the one getting off easy. I don’t have to do whatever it is I’m delaying. Maybe I’m tired. Maybe I’m distracted. Maybe I just don’t feel like doing it. Yes, I can power through. Yes, I have powered through. But if I don’t have to then it’s a win for both of us.

3.0 doesn’t always have to be mean. 3.0 can say, “I understand you don’t feel up to being punished so I’ll let it go till tomorrow” because 3.0 understands that Lion is tired or distracted or just doesn’t feel like doing it. I always thought of 2.0 as a benevolent dictator. Why wouldn’t 3.0 be one too?

By:
In: Lion's Journal, Living with a female led relationship, Male Chastity

Last night, punishment night, earned its name. As Mrs. Lion promised in her post, I was spanked. Details will be in her post later today. I’m writing this before actually being punished. Punishment time is usually after dinner and we’ve both had our showers. She often says that my butt is more tender after a nice, hot shower. I’m sure she’s right. For the record, I didn’t interrupt to get punished. I suspect that after my post yesterday, she became more aware of my bad habit.

Apparently, I’m going back to wearing the Jail Bird full time. Now that lock up is inevitable, I will enjoy my waning hours being wild. I truly have a love-hate relationship with wearing a chastity device. On one hand, it is arousing to be locked up. The feelings that inspired me to ask Mrs. Lion to start all this, remain. They’re not as strong, but they’re there.

On the other hand, it’s very convenient and comfortable to be wild. I can pee standing up. I can feel erections now and then. I’m not too worried about discovery. But when wild, there is absolutely no issue.

I’m equally ambivalent about our FLR with discipline. I think it is the right thing for us, but there are times I don’t like it. Those times often come when I am told to roll over to get spanked. I may not be in the mood to be spanked. Ahh! Not in the mood, am I? I see the obvious silliness with that. But at moments when my role is inconvenient or too painful, I wonder what I got myself into.

I used to have those moments with enforced chastity too. There were plenty of times I really hated having that cage locked on. Over time, those moments became less and less frequent. Once I’m settled in again, it will just be there. Dealing with the inconveniences of wearing a chastity device will just be part of my life.

Many years ago when my pubic hair was first removed, I was extremely self conscious about not having hair. When I had an appointment with a doctor who needed me undressed,  I would make it far enough in advance so that I could grow the hair back. Then, after the appointment. I would remove it again.

After a while, I didn’t care as much. I had laser hair removal and growing it back was no longer an option.  I had some twinges now and then, but by and large I stopped worrying. Of course, I had no choice. The hair is gone for good. Having no choice made it easier to stop worrying about how people would react. I was unable to do anything to change it.

This same logic holds true for being caged. When it’s clear that the cage is locked on and will remain on, there is no point in complaining about inconveniences or possible discovery. Like the removal of my pubic hair. It’s done. Period. No more wild lions here.

By:
In: Lion's Journal, Living with a female led relationship

For years I’ve asked people if they knew any women who actually introduced enforced male chastity into her relationship. I had some false leads; men who suggested it and then their partners following through later. No, that wasn’t what I had in mind. I was looking to see if some woman did research and came up with the idea for herself. None were discovered until now. OK, my discovery doesn’t yet count as a full-on female initiated enforced male chastity example; not yet. But it might.

I wrote about the difficulty a woman can face when asked to be dominant. One case I didn’t cover is when the woman decides she is happier as the top. I experienced this with my very first play partner. I expressed my longstanding interest in BDSM. She thought it interesting, but had no experience herself. She was a genius with a measured IQ north of 160. We both did a ton of reading (books, this was before the WWW).

We decided to experiment. We would take turns topping. One day I would top, the next was her turn. After about a week, we discovered that she was really grumpy the day after I topped her. She was cheerful after topping me. I enjoyed being topped. So, we decided that she would be the top all the time. She had fun, particularly when she made me squirm when being beaten with a riding crop.

She got into topping because it was fun for her. We never had sex as part of the scene. But after she was done, she would invariably ask me to be an “attack lion” and mount her. Of course, I did. We were both very turned on by our play. She had no internal struggles with the role of topping me. While the play was sexual to us both, it was never sex.

My needle in the haystack has the same backstory. She started off switching and then she and her husband both realized they were both happier with her as the top.

I learned that she has been reading the Journal. She’s recently starting commenting on the blog. I noticed her comments, we don’t get all that many, and clicked on her website. Her name is Sayyidsgirl. I read her most recent post and then started reading back. One, titled “Penis Power” discussed my recent post “Me and My Penis“. I really like the post. It’s a very interesting woman’s interpretation of my male point of view.

But that’s not the needle in this haystack. Sayyidsgirl actually wrote about locking her husband in a chastity device. Ok, get ready, this is the needle I have finally found: She introduced the idea to her husband and is working on getting him to accept wearing a chastity device. This is the first documented instance of a real female (most so-called keyholder bloggers are males expressing fantasies) discovering enforced chastity and proposing it to her husband. How about that?

She also offered a most interesting insight into why she wants to lock him up. She said,

“Knowing his penis is locked in a cage, only to be taken out and used for my pleasure, then put back away, is a rather delicious thought. The ultimate power and control.”

That’s the magic sentence. Isn’t that the essence of the male chastity fantasy? As far as I can tell, it’s also the only rational reason why a woman would want to lock up her partner’s penis. The other stuff about making him tamer, etc. is pure fantasy. I wonder if this sentence is more than just testing the waters of a power exchange. Does she really feel this way? Is she the Golden Fleece?

Needless to say, I’ve added her blog to my list of blogs I read. I look forward to learning if she actually snaps the lock on a chastity device.and. I can’t wait to find out.

By:
In: Female led relationship with discipline, Humiliation, Life with Mrs. Lion, Living with a female led relationship, Mrs Lion Comments

I always tease Lion about getting him one of those hula girl statues for his car. He grumbles every time. The other day we had our company Christmas lunch. We exchanged white elephant gifts and I wound up with a hula girl. Except it wasn’t a hula girl. It was a hula guy. I teased Lion about putting him in Lion’s car instead of a hula girl. He grumbled that he didn’t want it in his car. He suggested I put it in my truck.

I wasn’t really going to put him in Lion’s car but what if I did? Would it embarrass Lion to have a hula girl in his car? Yes. Would it be worse if the hula girl was a hula guy? Oh yes! The bigger question is that if I told Lion to put Braddah Ed (as the package calls him) on his dashboard, should he have to do it? I say yes. My power in this relationship is not relegated to the bedroom. Lion wears panties to work. He has two punishment shirts to wear in public. If he spills food on his shirt in a restaurant he still gets punished. My weenie is locked away no matter where he goes. If I want the hula man to dance on his dashboard the hula man should dance on his dashboard.

A few weeks ago my windshield got cracked when a rock bounced out of a truck on the highway. Many cars in Washington have cracked windshields. The cops don’t pay much attention. In New York they’d pull you over just for that. I don’t think Washington cops even bother mentioning it if they’ve pulled you over for something else. It’s just a fact of life here. The last time it happened Lion insisted I get it fixed right away. It wasn’t big and I figured I’d get creamed right away anyway but Lion was insistent. This time I wanted to wait a bit. The crack is growing and now Lion was getting worried. He made an appointment for the new windshield. He’s working from home this week so I stole his car to get to work. I told him yesterday that I’d install hula man on his dashboard while I had his car.

Unfortunately, hula man is a big boy. He doesn’t fit on Lion’s dash. I tried. Damn it! I wasn’t really going to leave him there. I just wanted to take a picture of the Buddha-bodied, grass-skirted sex symbol to make Lion nervous. He does, however, look right at home in the cup holder. He’d still be a reminder of exactly who’s in charge when he happened to catch Lion’s eye.