Trust And Verify

by Posted on 03/31/2016 Posted in Lion's Journal, Security 5 Comments

I’ve been writing and talking about a stricter 2.0. This prompted her to write a bit about my desire to be securely locked even more of the time. I pointed out that leaving me wild in the shower, for example, gives me an opportunity to masturbate unobserved. She said that if I did this, she would either unlock me and end enforced chastity or punish me. She isn’t sure which.

That comment started me thinking about how things have changed. In the beginning, enforced chastity was my “thing”. Mrs. Lion acted as my keyholder out of a desire to make me happy. Under those circumstances, ending enforced chastity would be the appropriate response to such a blatant defiance of what I wanted. Now, over two years later, I think that things are completely different.

Should I commit the sin of jerking off when not authorized and Mrs. Lion decides that we will end enforced chastity, a lot more will happen than no longer indulging my fantasy. We’ve evolved what started as a sexual game into the linchpin of our sexual relationship. If the cage comes off, how do we maintain the intimacy we have? There is no incentive for her to tease me. That was part of enforced chastity. She isn’t interested in sex for herself so there is no motivation for mutual sexual contact.

I think we would return to our past, unsatisfactory sexual distance. Mrs. Lion and I have discussed what might happen if I got tired of being locked up. She made it clear that is no longer an option for me. The reason: the risk of losing our sexual intimacy and other benefits we both enjoy. This is no longer my kink. It’s a key part of our relationship. So, ending it would be destructive to a lot more than my chastity fantasy.

If you wonder how this could happen since I know how important it is to surrender my sexuality, the answer is fairly simple. Assume I am daydreaming about something sexual while in the shower. I’m uncaged and my hand wanders into forbidden territory. It feels good and before I know it, I come. There is no excuse for it, but it could happen. I’m sure that most guys have had similar experiences. So far I have been extremely careful to no have such thoughts when wild.

Let’s assume I do this. What should Mrs. Lion do when she finds out? Since enforced chastity is so important to us both, ending it is probably off the table. Punishment must be administered. I have no idea what she would do, but I am very sure I wouldn’t forget it. The switch from abandoning the kink to punishing for a serious infraction is an indicator of how important enforced chastity has become for us. That’s why I am writing this. My sexual behavior is not only controlled by my lioness. She owns it absolutely and isn’t going to return it to me, ever.

A reason I wrote about stricter caging is based on my realization that we need to avoid giving me any opportunity to sexually touch myself. Yes, I have excellent self control. But enforced chastity is a 24/7/365 practice. Opportunities to mess up need to be avoided. As I see it, the less possibility of a “mistake” the better for me and for us.

That means I probably shouldn’t have any time when my penis is available and I am not directly supervised. No more “wild” showers unless Mrs. Lion is watching me. No RV weekends uncaged. If I am uncaged to use the bathroom, direct supervision should be supplied. The reason we use a locked chastity device is to make unauthorized sexual touching impossible. Since the consequences of an “accident” would resonate through our relationship, that locked device is much more than a symbol. It prevents a problem that would be difficult to handle.

[Mrs. Lion – I can see Lion’s point about a lapse in concentration in the shower. However, that implies that if he were not caged, a similar lapse in concentration could result in his cheating with another woman. I’m not sure how I would handle that. It would certainly take him a long time to regain my trust. Cheating in the shower may not be as severe an offense as cheating with another woman, but with our relationship at stake, why take a chance?]

Another View Of Chastity Security

by Posted on 06/20/2015 Posted in Lion's Journal, Security 2 Comments

Most guys when the first think about enforced chastity, spend quite a bit of time thinking about getting a device they will be unable to escape. The word enforced is hyper-critical to them. Endless time is spent worrying about “security” (wish I could do air quotes around that word). So many men order devices with the smallest possible base ring. Then they spend time suffering the frictional consequences of this choice. Their reasoning? If the device is very tight it will be harder to escape. Maybe. But it will also be much harder to wear. Strangle your scrotum and suffer irritation, loss of circulation, and constant pain. That early morning erection will become torture. “Good,” you say. Erections should hurt. I don’t know about that. I want to be able to sleep through the night.

The objection I hear most often is, “What’s the point of being locked up if I can escape?” That rhetorical question shows that it’s owner simply doesn’t understand enforced chastity at all. You  haven’t been taken sexual prisoner by a tribe of Amazons. You  aren’t locked up against your will. You asked your keyholder to lock you up. You want to be locked up. So why worry about escape? That is clearly the last thing you really want.

My view of enforced chastity is that I agreed to turn over sexual control to my lioness. I like that I am locked into a device that prevents even the smallest transgression. I can’t get hard or come as long as it is on. I realize that any ball-capture device is escapable. I can pull my soft penis out of the cage and base ring. Then, once freed, I can jerk off to my heart’s content. The thing is, once I pull out, I can’t put it back so Mrs. Lion won’t know I was so naughty. That’s the real security. If she found out, I would be in serious trouble. Also, I don’t have to do the penis gymnastics required to pull out. I have my emergency key. Oh wait, it’s inside a metal case with a tamper-evident label. If I open the case, Mrs. Lion will know. She will want solid evidence there was a serious emergency that required my extraction.

The real inescapable device is the one that reveals any escape. I surrendered sexual control to Mrs. Lion. I take that very seriously. There is no way I will cheat. But hypothetically, let’s say I want to masturbate. The only way I can do it is going to require me to either pull out or use my key. Either method will be quickly discovered by my lioness. I don’t want to think about what would happen to me when she made that discovery. I won’t have to find out of course. I’m not going there because I made a promise to her. I’m not going to break it.

Some guys get PA (Prince Albert) piercings (Image). Special padlocks and adapted chastity devices can lock that piercing to the cage. You can’t pull out if you take this course. Of course, not everyone wants a piercing like this. I had a frenum piercing for many years. Chastity devices are made to work with these piercings too. Of course it still comes down to why it is needed. Some guys really want to feel that level of inescapablity, but it truly isn’t needed.

My advice to someone who wants to start enforced chastity is to carefully consider the inevitable tradeoff between “security” and comfort. If the device hurts to wear, the odds are very strong that you will stop wearing it soon after you start. If you recognize that the real security is your promise to surrender sexual control, you can get a device that is completely comfortable to wear and is still secure enough to prevent the stray erection or momentary impulse to jerk off. Your promise takes care of the rest.