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In: Spanking
Hairbrush-shaped spanking paddle

Mrs. Lion tried the over-the-knee spanking experiment on Friday night. Sadly, it didn’t work very well. Maybe we aren’t doing it right. Even if we were, Mrs. Lion said that she didn’t have the leverage she needed to bruise my bottom. Poor dear. She finished the spanking with me over the edge of the bed. She used the hairbrush-shaped paddle. The shape is its only resemblance to a hairbrush. It’s made out of three-quarter-inch thick hardwood. It packs a solid swat. Mrs. Lion is happier with the spoon-shaped paddle. It is also thick hardwood with a long handle. The spanking spoon has a smaller striking area than the hairbrush. [Mrs. Lion — I was curious so I just compared them. They have exactly the same area.]

The spanking spoon paddle has both weight and leverage.

There’s no question about it, spanking me is an emotion-free activity for Mrs. Lion. It’s just one more thing in her day. She seems unmoved by my distress. [Mrs. Lion — If I thought about it on an emotional level, I don’t think I could spank him so ferociously.] I’m not complaining that she’s become a heartless lioness. This is exactly what I asked her to do. An effective, educational spanking is going to hurt a lot. If I don’t react strongly, it isn’t going to make much of an impression. Mrs. Lion’s paddlings make a strong impression on me. When she goes all out, it hurts to sit for three days afterward.

When I think about this, I mentally shake my head. I genuinely hate those spankings. I try hard to avoid them. Yet, I encourage Mrs. Lion to make them more severe. It’s like there are two people inside me. One is the experienced BDSM top who gets pleasure out of effective administration of pain. The other is the bottom, who wants the top to shut up because his encouragement makes the next spanking more painful.

Actually, this contradictory behavior is normal among men who get spanked. I haven’t found a single male domestic discipline situation that the female partner initiated. The men ask for it. It’s one hundred percent male-initiated and consensual. We want it. Mrs. Lion knows that I want her to increase the length and severity of my beatings. Neither of us knows why, but I do. She’s kind enough to accommodate me. What a sweetie!

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In: Spanking

Lion suggested that we not go to the casino last night because I wasn’t feeling well. I could have pointed out that I wasn’t sure I’d be feeling any better today. In fact, I don’t know if I feel better or worse. It’s probably nothing some Tylenol can’t solve. The only caveat I have is that we don’t eat too late and we don’t stay too long. Luckily, Lion agrees on both points. [Lion — I’m not stupid enough to disagree.]

Here is the hairbrush-shaped paddle against Lion’s butt. I took it just before releasing this post. It left the bruises you see in this image.

I got out the hairbrush paddle last night and we tried to do the position Lion found on a video. In it, the man lays sort of diagonally across the woman with his legs between hers, I assume, to keep him from escaping. Dutifully, Lion got into position – sort of. He was diagonal across me but his legs were fairly straight out. I’m not sure how I would have gotten one between mine. So I did the next best thing. I grabbed him around the waist and started paddling.

While I wasn’t uncomfortable with his weight or the feeling he would simply roll off, two things stood out to me. I don’t think Lion was particularly comfortable. And I could have used a longer paddle for leverage. I don’t know how comfortable Lion is normally when he’s in spanking position. When he wiggles around he starts to fall off the bed. He does better when he can push his feet against the garbage can next to the wall. Once he kicks that out of the way, he has no more leverage and slowly slides down to his knees. When I’m standing next to him and I’m using a longer paddle, I can build up a full head of steam to give each swat more power. Even after we went back to that position last night, my arm got tired trying to do many whacks with the hairbrush.

The thought just occurred to me that our angle is off. The bed is pretty high. Lion is about six inches taller than me so it’s easier for him to get into and out of bed with it that high. I don’t think the answer is a kitchen chair. That wouldn’t give enough room for him to lay across me. I was thinking about the couch, but it’s lower and Lion might have a harder time getting up or down from it. I think we either have to abandon over the knee or keep trying until we hit upon the right position for us. It may very well be that the position we tried last night could work if we tweak it a little.

In addition to a successful over the knee position, I think we still need to work on his regular on the bed position. Maybe he needs to be on the bed further. That might keep him from escaping so easily. I still think the yoga pillow can work. We just have to continue our spanking experiment to perfect both.

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In: Punishment, Spanking

The other day I was working in my home office. I’m on a quest to get an agent. It’s a frustrating process that is unlikely to work out. Unsolicited submissions like mine are almost always ignored. Do you know a literary agent that might help me? Anyway, the doorbell rang, and Mrs. Lion answered it. She was home early from work. It was one of her friends who was stopping by on the way out of town. They chatted. I felt odd. I was, as usual, stark naked. Her friend knows me, and I expected her to say hello. I wondered if she would poke her head into my office. She didn’t say hello or poke. I was glad because it would have been embarrassing. I was also a little upset she didn’t say hello. I thought she liked me. [Mrs. Lion — I bet she thought it was a little odd you didn’t say hello to her.]

Saturday night was definitely not frustrating. Mrs. Lion gave me a huge oral orgasm after a nine-day wait. I loved it! In her post yesterday, she commented that I asked her to use her hand a different way when teasing me. I may have offended her a little. I didn’t mean to do that. It just didn’t feel very good, and I had a suggestion that improved things a lot. I hope that feedback wasn’t inappropriate. [Mrs. Lion — Not offended. I was trying to be funny in my post.]

We’ve been discussing adding dialogue to my spankings. Mrs. Lion isn’t sure she can do that. I understand. She had a very steep learning curve to give me disciplinary spankings. Adding scolding is another challenge that may be more than she wants to accept at this point. We received a very instructive comment on the subject from Julie of strictjuliespanks (one of my favorite blogs). Here’s what she said:

“Scolding during spanking and getting a response I find to be very useful as a way of gauging how much to spank that day. When his responses go from a bit surly to heartfelt, contrite, and pleading, it acts as a sort of “yellow” signal that he’s about done. Mind you, as lion says, that’s when you can announce the warmup is over and punishment will now start.

Scolding requires a bit of practice but is really pretty easy in the end. Just don’t be at all concerned with being repetitive. You can ask over and over again “will you ever do that again?”. Add in a few “I think it’s ridiculous that a man your age needs to be punished like a little boy” and you’re all set. Better yet, lion is a writer, and is obsessed, so ask him to print out a long list of scolding phrases that turn his crank. Each time you can pull out 2 or 3 new ones. Once you have a repertoire of a dozen or so, it’s more than enough as you can chain them together in so many different ways.”

It’s excellent advice. I can see how adding this to my punishment can be very challenging. Speaking of challenges, Mrs. Lion agreed that she would find ways to express her displeasure if I am a know-it-all or interrupt her. She can probably give me “the look” when I do it and follow up later. We discussed pre-spanking activities. Often, Mrs. Lion’s shoulder will be hurting, and she won’t feel up to beating me. We talked about her soaping my mouth or doing some other unpleasant, low-energy thing close to the offense and then spanking me when convenient for her. We both agree that spanking is the best way to punish me. The other activities serve as placeholders.

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In: Punishment, Spanking

Mrs. Lion seems proud of her ability to keep my bottom sore for three days so far. It is an accomplishment. She has moved up to lioness 4.0 when it comes to discipline. We’ve talked a bit about the verbal side of punishment. I wrote about it in this post. I think that requiring me to beg and verbally respond during the spanking will be almost as difficult for her as it is for me.

The sort of mid-spanking conversation is a technique used by disciplinarians from time immemorial. It greatly amplifies the punishment’s humiliation and underlines the fact that the activity is being performed for a reason. I think Mrs. Lion might be challenged for almost the same reason I resist this part of the punishment: it makes the disciplinary roles crystal clear. It also underlines the reason for the painful activity. It forces me to acknowledge my transgression and beg for forgiveness. The conversation might go like this:

[Mrs. Lion spanking hard and me yelping]

Mrs. Lion: “Why am I punishing you?”

Lion: “I didn’t set up the coffee pot.”

“Are you supposed to set it up every day?”

“Yes, Ma’am.”

“Why didn’t you?”

“I forgot.”

“You, what?”

“I forgot to set up the coffee pot.”

“Was that naughty?”

“Yes, Ma’am.”

“Do you deserve your spanking?”

“Yes, Ma’am.”

“Do you have something to say?”

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry! Please stop…”

You get the idea. It forces me to focus on why I’m being punished and makes me humbly admit what I did and beg for forgiveness and for Mrs. Lion to end the spanking. Both of us have avoided this critical part of the punishment. Similarly, when Mrs. Lion inquires on the days after about whether it hurts to sit, she might want to ask me if I know why I have a sore bottom. This reinforces the lesson I am being taught.

aren’t there other rules?

As far as I can tell, the only rule being enforced is requiring me to set up the coffee pot. We need to review this topic. I know that I’m supposed to wait for Mrs. Lion to eat before I start. I do that consistently, so enforcement is either unnecessary or Mrs. Lion has stopped checking. Since I don’t wear shirts or anything else when we eat, the no-spilling-food-on-my-shirt rule is moot. Mrs. Lion doesn’t enforce the no-interrupting rule.

If we are going to get better at our disciplinary relationship, I probably need more opportunities to be punished. I know that Mrs. Lion likes catching me breaking the rules. We probably need to look at what behavioral changes she might like me to make. The only way we will advance to the enforcement of things that annoy her is to make the formal disciplinary process automatic. We’ve perfected catch-and-spank for the coffee pot. Now maybe we need catch-and-spank-and-scold for more things.