Yesterday, Mrs. Lion wrote about our different points of view (post). We really don’t have a very different view of things. I suggested that while Mrs. Lion had her sexual training wheels and is getting her libido back, it would be a good idea that I stay locked while I gave her orgasms. I want to make sure she isn’t thinking about reciprocating. I want her focused on her own pleasure.

She wrote that she would like us to come together, or at least close together. I want that too, very badly. I hope it will happen once she has recovered her interest. As a practical matter, I will always get far fewer orgasms than she. It would be a giant treat to come with her. I know other keyholders and their males have delightful sex together. I am very hopeful we will too in the not-to-distant future. Speaking of the future, Mrs. Lion’s next scheduled orgasm is January 2nd. We will have a very hot New Year. I am due both New Year’s eve and New Year’s day. Mrs. Lion is the day after. That’s really great.

There has been talk in these pages about Mrs. Lion painting my toe nails, putting me back in diapers, and perhaps panties on non-diaper days. Because I mention these things, Mrs. Lion asked me if it is because I want them. That’s a tough question. I never saw myself with painted toe nails or wearing panties, but the thought has an element of excitement for me.

Mrs. Lion said she will definitely be doing my toe nails. She hasn’t so far. I really hate anticipating things that I am not sure I will like. It’s hard to explain. I guess it is like a punishment. It feels way worse waiting for it than just getting it done. Also, there is that little tingle of excitement.

I know this isn’t strictly chastity, and you may find this diversion uninteresting or even a turn off. For me it is forward movement in sexual control. It is physical evidence that I can’t ignore. It’s also totally irrational. I don’t get it; well more precisely, I don’t get how all this makes me feel. Are these hidden kinks that are emerging now? I suppose they could be. I just don’t know. But, as part of my decision to share everything with you, I guess you will end up reading about this new stuff too.

This new stuff might be puzzling Mrs. Lion. Am I becoming even more difficult to understand? Do these kinks drive her away or repel her? I don’t think she would tell me if they do. I’m just a mess of uncertainty and uncomfortable anticipation. Stay tuned.