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In: 2.0, diapers, Lion's Journal
diaper and painted toenails
Two of my least favorite challenges from Mrs. Lion, painted toenails and diaper wearing.

My libido seems to be returning. There isn’t a specific explanation for this, but the sexual weather vane is pointing in the direction of “horny”. It’s not that I’m sporting a chubby inside my chastity device. But I have those little feelings that usually signify an erection might be imminent. I’m also craving firm control. I haven’t felt this way in some time. I’m getting horny thinkingt about activities I know I hate. For me, that’s a sure sign I want action.

I know that there is a strong sexual component in my desire to surrender. It is certainly what ignited my desire to begin enforced male chastity, and later, FLR. I suspect that a lot of guys are like me. We are turned on by the idea of surrendering control of our cocks. The hardware is a big turn on. The fantasies are hot. I am lucky enough to be married to an amazing woman who was willing to play the game with me. So we played. And played some more. Somehow, during all that play, it ceased being a game. It became the way we live. The same thing happened with FLR. It started as a great turn on for me and is now the way we live.

Of course, you know all that. But here’s the thing: As an extraordinary life goes on, it can begin to feel routine. Those cool, FLR things that seem so admirable to others are automatic for us. The spark seems to fade. This is how things have been feeling to me. Mrs. Lion, a fledgling disciplining wife, is easily put off by my situational depression. Well, that’s  not entirely true. She wasn’t put off enough to skip punishing me when I interrupted her or got food on my shirt. So, she never faltered in her role. She has, however, been giving me space and hasn’t been pushing play or sex. That makes sense if the reason we play is for my entertainment.

What if some of the activities that I usually enjoy also entertain Mrs. Lion? What if she actually missed those things when, for one reason or another, we didn’t do them? What if she did them for herself, not me? Then it would be difficult for me to hide in my feelings. It would also mean that she would be letting herself look for other activities that she would like to try on me. That would be very cool.

I wonder if there aren’t things she isn’t doing that she would enjoy if she weren’t so concerned about how I would feel about them. We haven’t gone near diapers in ages, because, I assume, she knows I hate them. How does she feel about them? I hate her adventures with nail polish. Does she like doing that to me? I have no idea. We don’t talk about what she likes to do. We talk about how I react to things we do. I think it is time to find out what Mrs. Lion or 2.0 actually likes. I may hate the result, but I will love that she is doing things she wants. What do you say, 2.0?

By:
In: diapers, Femdom, Lion's Journal

The weekend is half over. Mrs. Lion’s diaper plan is diabolical. I have to wear the wet diaper for an hour after I pee, then I get to use a new one. It isn’t long after I change that I need to pee again. I am spending this weekend in wet diapers. Yuck. I asked her if she liked doing this to me. She said,

“I don’t care about the diapers, but I like that you hate wearing them.”

There you go. I can think of several adjectives for a person who feels that way. I don’t think that Mrs. Lion is a sadist, but she has grown a perverse sense of humor. I’m responsible for that. After all, I have asked her to make me feel her control. She correctly reasons that forcing me to do something I like is probably not an expression of control. It’s indulging me. So, logically, I have to dislike what I am doing for me to understand it is the force of her power that puts me into the predicament.

I do not have a diaper fetish. I don’t want to be an adult baby. And, I absolutely hate wearing a wet diaper. You try cooking dinner while this wet, heavy mass keeps trying to fall off. I was getting positively cranky trying to cook. Couple that with Mrs. Lion helping and the dog underfoot and I was softly growling the entire time. I have to face another day of this today. We may need to go shopping and I may get to go without a diaper. It will be a welcome relief.

This post is not about diapers. It’s about forced dependence. I’m an independent critter who can take care of himself. I avoid depending on others. It rarely works out well when I do. That doesn’t mean that I’m not devoted and absolutely in love with my lioness. I depend on her emotionally, but not physically or financially. So, make me wear diapers and magically I am physically dependent on her. I can’t change a wet one unless she agrees. If she wants I have to sleep in it as well as go shopping in one.

This may feel like an inconvenience to you, but it isn’t. It’s annoying and humiliating. It’s not a bit sexy and I don’t smell all that good either. The only redeeming value is that it shows my obedience to Mrs. Lion and it amuses her that I am so unhappy with it. I think she also likes the fact that she is standing fast in the face of my obvious discomfort.

I wish I could argue with this thinking. I can’t. She’s found an expression of pure dominance over me. It isn’t harmful, just hateful. It doesn’t inconvenience her, only me. No sympathy, no giving in, just another long day of soggy diapers. The last time she tried this, I whined a short time after peeing. This time I’ve shut up. Next time she probably won’t let me change until I am ready to pee again. I can handle it. I’ll just hate it like I hate what’s happening now.

Should others try this too? I have no idea. I think that there is a lot of value in showing dominance by making me do something that has no redeeming value to me. I will not get aroused looking back on this weekend. I won’t get a rush thinking about that she makes me do this. No redeeming value. Just two very long, soggy days learning that I do not control my destiny. That’s Mrs. Lion’s pleasure.

By:
In: diapers, Mrs Lion Comments

As instructed, Lion is in a diaper this weekend while we’re home. Anytime he would have been naked, he’s in a diaper. He’s been very good about informing me when he pees and asks if he can change an hour after he’s wet.

There were only a few times in his diaper-wearing adventures that I made him wear one while we were in public. It seemed to be too much. For both of us. I was worried people would see it or it would leak. Lion was just unhappy about wearing it. For now, I’ve limited it to in-house use. That can always change.

I’m not making Lion sleep in his diaper because sleep is a commodity that seems hard to come by for us under normal circumstances. I don’t want to make it any more difficult than it has to be. Lion likes sleeping nude and I like having a nude Lion sleeping next to me. So no diaper at night. That can always change too.

This weekend Lion will be playing with his drone outside. While he’s clothed he won’t need to wear a diaper. I don’t want him to have to worry about anything other than flying. If I distract him with wet pants he’s likely to crash. We don’t want that. So no diaper while clothed even at home.

Last night Lion said as long as he has to wear a diaper he might as well be unlocked. Oh yeah? Who made that rule? He waved his hand in the air and said,

“Me!”

Then I asked who gets to make the rules.

<softly>”Not me.”

That’s what I thought. Now, last weekend he was supposed to be wild and diapered, but our plans changed. I never said he would be wild this weekend. Maybe next weekend he’ll be wild with another trade off. I don’t know. You never know what’s going to happen in the Lions’ den.

 

By:
In: diapers, Female led relationship with discipline

In one of our email exchanges I asked Lion if he had any ideas for dinner. He responded with chicken parm, if that was ok. Yum! Definitely ok. It is a lot of work and, when I walked through the door, Lion apologized for not having any vegetable for the meal. I will never have a problem with no vegetable. Fruit either. I know I should eat better, but fruits and vegetables are not my favorite. Besides, it was a lot of food already. And spaghetti sauce counts as a vegetable, right?

While I was doing the dishes, Lion asked if he could lie down for a while. His back hurt and he wasn’t sure what he did to it. Well I’m not going to make him dry the dishes if he’s hurting, so I told him to lie down. I still needed to go to the camper for the food and Lion said he could help but needed to rest for a bit. When I was ready to go out he said he’d help, stood up, said “nope” and was back down again. So off I went, with the dog, to get the food. By the time I got back in the house my back had some twinges of its own. We make quite a pair. But I knew mine were just muscle spasms that would go away in a little bit.

That was pretty much our evening. He took some Tylenol and I just rested. Since he had had his awesome orgasm the night before I didn’t think he’d be looking for action anyway. And he hasn’t been sleeping well either. It was a non-punishment non-play night. Well it was punishment night but he had nothing on his list. And our not playing had nothing to do with punishment. It was just a day off.

Today we have some errands to run. As I drove home last night I was thinking about painting some Lion toes again. There’s really no reason why. I just want to. Well, yes there is a reason why. It makes him squirm. And he makes a funny face. And because I can. That seems like enough reasons to do it. It’s actually pretty funny that he would have such a distasteful reaction to something that isn’t very visible at all. He probably wouldn’t notice it unless I told him he had pretty toes. So, naturally, I point it out a lot. I could be worse; I could make him wear a diaper.