Why Don’t We Want Rewards As Well As Punishments?
Males are always in heat. It’s nature’s way of ensuring species reproduce. Most mammal females are only interested in sex when they are fertile and ready to conceive. Males have to be ready when the female goes into heat. This is less true of humans and some other primates. Females are receptive even when not able to conceive. They can be convinced to fuck at any time in their fertility cycle. Sex, for us, is a way to bond. It’s also a way to keep males close to home.
Women who understand this can use our constant heat to control us. Vanilla women use sex as a reward for obedience. It’s not always obvious; do this, and you can have sex. It’s usually a passive-aggressive action where sex is withheld if he pisses her off. No wonder so many men cheat.
Sex as a reward can be a very positive part of a relationship. I think the key is to be upfront about it. I’m a little surprised that Mrs. Lion is comfortable punishing me when I need correction, but very reluctant to provide rewards when I’m good. She never withholds sex for any reason other than she feels ill or I’m not due for an orgasm. I don’t need to deserve an orgasm in order to get one. I just have to wait until Mrs. Lion decides I should have one
A lot of male chastity fiction is focused on delaying orgasms as a punishment. Not much suggests an orgasm as a reward. It seems that a lot of guys are more turned on by the punishment than the reward. Domestic discipline doesn’t include rewards, either. It’s all about punishment. I haven’t seen any posts or comments from men wanting rewards as well as spankings. Maybe adding rewards makes the power exchange too real.
Mrs. Lion says that she spanks me because I want it. Yes, I do. We both like spankings more if they are connected to me failing to do something I should. “Just Because” spankings tend to be milder and shorter. We never agreed to this. It’s just what happens. Obviously, Mrs. Lion is more motivated when I break a rule. Speaking of which, I’m long overdue for punishments for interrupting and forgetting to get my pill packets. Mrs. Lion hasn’t been feeling well and has had to put off all punishments and sex.
I suppose you could say that doing my chores and being respectful is expected of me. Why should I get a reward for doing what I should? If that’s true, are we saying that positive reinforcement isn’t useful in domestic discipline? Even in male chastity, we don’t hear of earning orgasms sooner than expected. We always hear about delaying them as a punishment.
It’s also harder to set up a system of rewards, at least for existing rules. What if Mrs. Lion makes a new rule? Should she reward me if I follow it? She punishes me if I don’t. I can’t answer that. The question doesn’t compute. All the behavioral psychology books tell us that positive reinforcement works better than negative to change behavior. Yet, we never use it.
The reason may have nothing to do with power exchange. I want to be spanked. I need it. In the past, I left relationships because it wasn’t something my partner would do. I also need sex. All of my partners provided that. I think that both male chastity and domestic discipline are adult games. Sure, they both have real value in a relationship, but they are consensual activities a couple practices. Maybe the reward is the game itself. That’s why the idea of adding rewards for good behavior makes no sense in our context. What do you think?