By:
In: Advice for a new keyholder, Advice to caged males, Femdom, Lion's Journal, Male Chastity, Sex
Work in progress sign
Dreams and fantasies happen all at once.
Real progress takes time and very hard work.

I have been locked up for a while now. Each week I find that wearing the cage becomes more and more a natural part of my life. I am generally unaware that it is there between my legs. Other things are happening as well. I’ve stopped asking for sexual attention. Yes, I still get incredibly horny and I silently ask Mrs. Lion to relieve that itch, but I don’t ask out loud. I work hard to avoid asking for anything sexual for me or for her. It’s no longer something I should do. I find myself looking for ways I can help her. Most importantly, I am making a conscious effort not to argue or offer my opinion unless asked.

That might sound like my personality is dissolving into a bland, passive mush. I don’t think so. My nature is not passive in the least. I’m not fooling myself. I still contribute actively to pretty much everything except decisions regarding sex. That’s definitely off limits for me. Over time I am hoping that I will continue to become more and more attentive. I want to focus more attention on pleasing my lioness. It makes me smile to type those words. One of the premises of forced male chastity is always that the male becomes attentive and more and more interested in the keyholder’s pleasure. I admit it. I just never saw that as a natural process. I figured that it could happen, but probably needed the keyholder to provide the incentives needed to modify the caged male’s behavior.

Apparently those incentives aren’t necessary. It just seems to happen on its own. I’m sure that I have a very long way to go. On the other hand, I had a mental image of how my lioness would take charge and provide the control and discipline that I wanted. Now I realize that sort of expectation is as unrealistic as expecting me to become a fawning sycophant. While locking up my penis is a single act, the changes a male chastity lifestyle requires takes substantial time and cultivation.

Mrs. Lion is making wonderful progress. She is thinking (and writing) about sexual activities to heighten our enjoyment of this lifestyle. Even more significantly, she is growing more independent in her actions when we are together. Today is a case in point. We were out running errands. I asked if she wanted to get lunch; I was feeling hungry. She asked where I would like to go. So far, this is our normal conversation when it comes to deciding if we want to get a meal and if we do, where to go. I said that I didn’t care. Normally, she would throw out some ideas for me to consider. Not today. Instead, she drove purposefully to a local fast food restaurant without saying another word. That may sound like small stuff, but it isn’t. She took control and acted. She didn’t consult me; she just went where she decided to go. I, for my small part, kept my mouth shut and went along for the ride.

She made significant progress with that move. I’m sure it wasn’t easy for her to do that. What’s interesting is that this step had nothing to do with sex and everything to do with forced chastity. The little cage that follows me everywhere stimulated a change in a completely unrelated part of our lives. That change felt completely right to me.

If you had asked me how I would gauge our progress, I would have talked about tease-and-deny, ruined orgasms, spankings, milkings, extra time in the cage, and the other chastity-related sexual activities. By the way, there is progress sexually too. But today’s subtle change is a much more profound signal to me. It shows us changing some of our basic behaviors as a couple. When she reads this, Mrs. Lion may shake her head and say that there was no change, she asked me and since I didn’t say where I wanted to go, she simply went where she liked. That is an accurate description of what happened. But, Mrs. Lion, that has never happened before in the more-than-a-decade we have been together. Progress!

By:
In: Femdom, Keyholder, Sex

Here are my somewhat immediate problems. And these are only problems in that I know as a top they shouldn’t be problems. But for me it is a constant wrestling match in my mind about how I should act (i.e. what is expected of me as a top) and what I actually want.

I don’t mind when Lion suggests things. I don’t feel pressure to do those things. I used to. But now when he says he’s horny or this is what he’d like, I consider them and decide what to do. I am more likely now to laugh at him or tease him more if he says he’s horny. Poor baby!

My sex drive is still not where Lion wants it. On the one hand, who cares? It’s not what he wants that counts. On the other hand, he thinks he’s letting me down by not pleasing me. Not true. He is being more attentive. This pleases me.

I like to give Lion orgasms. Again, this is only a problem from the point of view of me as a top. Last night as I was teasing him, I said I was thinking about making him come every night. He said he would be thrilled with that. I know male chastity involves making him wait to come but damn it I like giving him orgasms. Then I said I might see how many times I can make him orgasm in a given day. Again he perked up. We discussed giving him a time limit and if he doesn’t have an orgasm in that time frame then he doesn’t get to have one at all. I’ll probably do all of that at some point in time.

So all of this leaves me with doubts as to whether I am making progress or not. Sometimes I feel like I am and other times not so much. I know I have an inner bitch but she is usually reserved for that idiot driver in front of me who can’t seem to do the speed limit. Lion wishes I would harness some of that road rage and put it to use on him. That’s not how I’m wired.

I just think we have to find our own way. Somehow we’ll figure it out. There is no one size fits all approach.

By:
In: Femdom, Keyholder

I do some of my best thinking in the shower. Yesterday I had some good ideas.

Ever since I moved in I have been the breakfast maker. Lion says he can’t function at that hour. If you could see me in my sleepy stupor bouncing off the hallway walls on the way to the kitchen some mornings, you’d know that I frequently cannot function at that hour either. And sometimes it’s difficult to come up with something other than the same old, same old. On Sunday, Lion made French toast. Yum! While I was in the shower I wondered why can’t he do this more often? Ding! Lion will be in charge of weekend breakfast! Yay me! Excellent idea.

Yesterday afternoon I had to do some manscaping. Lion likes to be bare down there. Actually he likes to be bare from his belly button down to his upper thighs all the way around. Not really sure why. So I took out the hedge clippers and sheared him. When I got out of my shower, I decided to shave my legs. And the thought occurred to me. If I manscape him, why shouldn’t he womanscape me? Ding! Another excellent idea!

Lion had no problem with making breakfast on the weekends. He knows it doesn’t have to be elaborate. Cereal is ok some mornings. He is nervous about womanscaping though. He doesn’t want to cut me. I have assured him that with the electric razor there is little chance of hacking off my limb.

I’m very happy with my ideas. And a little proud of myself too. It’s been difficult for me to wrap my mind around topping him. Perhaps I just need to take baby steps.

By:
In: Body Hair Removal, Femdom, Keyholder, Lion's Journal
View of the velcro "ties"that are wrapped tightly around lion's soft penis. Any attempt at erection results in pain as the "teeth" dig in.
View of the velcro “ties”that are wrapped tightly around lion’s soft penis. Any attempt at erection results in pain as the “teeth” dig in. To see lion model this painful wardrobe, click here

Sunday afternoon, Mrs. Lion unlocked me so that she could do routine hair removal. Every few weeks, my pubic hair is removed as well as the hair on my upper thighs and my butt, inside and out. She does this with a combination of tools: a Braun epilator that pulls hair out by the roots. She uses this on my main pubic region as well as my thighs and outer butt. That’s followed by an electric body shaver that takes care of my balls, shaft and crack. When she is done, I am as bare as a…well…lion’s bottom. After she finished she said that she wasn’t going to lock me up until my shower so that I can get a chance to wash without the cage. She said that she still didn’t want any unauthorized erections.

Having said that, she went to her cock and ball toy bag and removed some velcro cable ties we had purchased some time ago. She was drawn to them by their nice colors as well as the fact that they have very scratchy teeth on the inside. Over the years she has used these when we play. She takes the ties and fastens them tightly around my soft penis. She usually gets three along the shaft by stretching it as she applies the velcro. The velcro is tightly pulled, squeezing my shaft and the little teeth hurt as they bite in. Once she gets them on, she begins stimulating me, making me get very hard. The velcro doesn’t give. My cock is “strangled” by nasty hook-bearing strips. When hard, it looks like I have big dents in the shaft where the velcro digs in.

This really hurts! Wow does it ever. My lioness generally observes gently, “If it really hurt, you would be soft.”

Oh no! I am hard as a rock and hurting like hell. It’s a sexual irony. The pain is actually making me harder. Eventually she takes pity on me and releases the velcro. That is its own special brand of hell. When the velcro is released, the blood rushes into the dent the velcro made. That rush feels like my cock was hit by a hammer. She always smiles when she sees this reaction.

That is how she uses them for play. Today she put them on my soft penis quite tightly. She told me that if I try to get hard, I know what will happen: those little teeth will dig into my cock and hurt more and more the harder I get. They also hurt on my soft cock too. Every time I move in my chair, the hooks dig into the soft skin. I have to agree that this velcro cock bondage is an effective way to prevent lion erections. My lioness can certainly be diabolical when she wants. Another reason I love her so much!