Under The Surface
I’m three time zones away from Mrs. Lion. Jet lag isn’t too much of an issue because in order to make my flight, we had to get up at 4:30 AM. That’s two hours earlier than usual. It balances out at my end. This trip is topping off my memory bank for all the time I won’t be able to go anywhere.
I’ve always liked to travel and explore new places. Through many years of our marriage, I’ve had to travel on business. The last years have been travel free. We both enjoyed this continuous time together. My current job requires some travel, but nothing like it was in the past. I admit that my destination is great. But the empty space in the bed next to me takes much of the fun out of things.
During the long flight, I was thinking about how our power exchange travels. A lot of guys work hard to find chastity devices that will pass through airport security. I wonder if their keyholders are as concerned about on-the-road chastity.
Mrs. Lion never expressed any concern that I would cheat if unlocked and out of her sight. Think about it. Would you want to be married to someone who can only be trusted when under y0ur direct supervision? I didn’t think so.
The chastity device is a self-control aid, not a tool used by your keyholder to enforce her decision to make you wait to come. There’s nothing wrong with that. I think it is more fun to not be able to play with myself. Of course, I won’t without permission. Is the device necessary? No. At least not for me.
That isn’t the end of the story. I’m sure that a large number of keyholders, perhaps including Mrs. Lion, like seeing their men with a chastity device locked over their cocks. Both partners like it. It’s a potent symbol of possessio.
Wearing the chastity device may have less to do with preventing unauthorized sex than being an exciting form of full-time bondage.
If that’s the case, then both partners can focus on this exciting hardware and make wearing it more fun and interesting. I wonder if after considering this, Mrs. Lion will have some new ideas.
Trying
There’s not much going on around here. I put Lion on an airplane this morning. Well, I didn’t actually put him on the plane. I dropped him at the curb at the airport and went to work. As I write this he’s probably somewhere over Colorado. By the time you read it, he’ll have landed.
I think this time away from each other tends to make us sit back and contemplate things more. We can’t actually do anything when we’re on opposite ends of the country, but maybe we think about things we’re missing or not doing quite the way we want to do them. Some things are easier broached from a distance. I think that’s why the blog works so well for us.
If it weren’t for the blog, I don’t think we’d be where we are today. Sure, I agreed to lock him up in a chastity device, but it wasn’t until I read the blog that I realized how unhappy he was with our sex life. He didn’t feel comfortable talking to me about it. He didn’t want me to feel bad. I can’t say I didn’t feel bad, but it got us talking. And sometimes things are easier to digest when you read them.
When you’re not sitting face to face with someone who’s expecting an immediate response, you can mull things over a bit. Your first reaction may be that you could never do what is being suggested. Maybe it shocks you or turns you off. But maybe you reread it and think about it. Is it really that bad? Was your gut reaction fair? What happens if you try it? It’s not set in stone. It may turn out to be something you like.
As odd as it sounds for me to say it, given my distaste for change, I think you just have to give things a try. Rather than making my kids eat all the lima beans on their plates, I’d just ask them to try them. They couldn’t tell me they hated it without trying it. If they couldn’t stomach the lima beans, then they could say they didn’t like them.
Another example is sushi. I think it looks beautiful. I just don’t want to eat raw fish. I did try it once and did not like it. But was it just that particular type of sushi I didn’t like? There are so many different kinds, there’s bound to be something I can eat. Well, there is. I am at Lion’s mercy to point out what things are, but I can eat some sushi. You don’t know till you try.
Beyond The Paddle
I’m on my way south again for my last business trip before surgery. It will be at least two months post surgery before I can take care of myself well enough to travel alone. I’ll be back at the end of the week. It’s not a terrible trip by any means.
Yesterday, I asked Mrs. Lion whether she thought our FLR and male chastity would survive the long period of rule suspension while I recover. She said that she had been thinking about this too. She said that she didn’t plan to let me disregard her rules for long at all. She pointed out that she may put up with me interrupting me while stoned on the pain meds I will be taking in the beginning. But once I had better control, she expects me to toe the line. If I do interrupt her, for example, she will tell me in no uncertain terms.
Spanking and most other punishments aren’t going to be possible while my arm is in a sling. So stern words will have to do. While we didn’t discuss it, we both thought about other punishments that would work during my recovery. I could think of several. But I also realized that piling more misery on me, while trying to live with no use of my right arm, is probably too much.
My worry isn’t that I would go out of control because Mrs. Lion didn’t have me on a tight leash. It is that we would lapse back into our old patterns and my lioness would stop being the leader. I don’t want that. I can’t speak for her. We haven’t arrived at the point where our roles are fully assimilated into our personalities and our lifestyle. We’re getting there, but we have a way to go.
So, six months or more of less clear lines of authority could slowly revert all the work we have done. But with me in bed and clearly in pain, Mrs. Lion maintaining her authority is not a simple task. You might think that the solution is for her to be just as strict as ever. That’s reasonable in many ways, but there are a couple of problems with this idea.
First, I may not be aware that I am doing something wrong. Strong pain medication does reduce my connection with reality. I doubt I would even know what I am supposed to do when medicated. Second, I will be under continuous physical and emotional stress as I try to cope with my new disability. Wouldn’t adding punishment make things even worse? I know Mrs. Lion thinks so.
It seems to me that the only way to continue our FLR-in-training is for Mrs. Lion’s authority to be based on my desire for her approval. Showing disappointment when I forget or break a rule is about as severe a punishment as I can take. Actually, that is pretty severe. I already feel that I am putting her out way too much. To disappoint her as well is horrible. It may be too much.
Spanking is very painful; but when it is done, I’ve paid for my crime. Feeling that I disappointed Mrs. Lion will keep hurting for a long time. It’s a much harsher punishment than a beating could ever be. I think Mrs. Lion is aware of this. There’s a lot for both of us to learn when the paddle has to be left in it’s place.
One Step Forward, No Steps Back
Last night, I had a silly thought. Why can’t Lion view his sling as a form of bondage? Of course that’s very silly since there’s nothing sexual about the sling that’s holding his arm in place while he heals. But, technically, it is a form of bondage. OK. Serious up.
I decided we should do our errands early so I can get the laundry done early and Lion can pack and then relax for the rest of the day. He didn’t sleep well last night. His shoulder hurts today. It seems like the perfect time to test out his cryotherapy machine. The laundry is in and he’s getting things all charged up for his trip.
Lion’s rules are suspended so I didn’t really notice if he put on his training collar before we went out. I do try to sneak a peek at his dresser to see if he remembered, or I try to connect to it with my phone. But, as I said, the rules are suspended. However, he was lagging a little behind me when I got in the truck and he said he had to circle back because he forgot something. I asked if it was the training collar. It was. He’s still trying to follow the rules. He’s afraid we’ll let everything go once he has his surgery and we’ll be back to square one.
Obviously, he’s not going to want sex for a while. He’ll be in pain and in no mood for love. Enforced chastity will just become plain, old chastity. But even though the rules are suspended, he can still try to follow them. We decided that, assuming he’s not loopy from drugs, I should point out when he breaks a rule. He won’t get punished, but at least we both know he’s trying to obey and I’m watching him. I’m not enforcing the rules, but I am still paying attention. That way it won’t be as difficult to jump back in once the rules are back in force.
In addition to that, we’ll decide when each rule comes back based on his recovery. It doesn’t make any sense for me to catch him interrupting me when he’s babbling on drugs. But, let’s say in a month, when he’s mostly off the pain meds, he’s coherent enough to understand that he’s interrupting, that rule may come back. If he’s able to eat without spilling everything all over the place, maybe in a few weeks, that rule can come back. If we’re going out and he remembers the training collar but can’t put it on by himself, he can ask me to put it on him. Then maybe that rule comes back.
There’s no magic formula to when the rules come back. It will depend on his progress and recovery. Maybe a rule comes back and has to be suspended again. That’s fine. We’ll just deal with it as it comes. The main thing is to maintain some semblance of FLR and, more importantly, communication.
